PA1983 Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 I fell in love with a girl once. I was in the service and she was in college. I really really loved this girl and to make a long story short she eventually broke up with me and I was ruined. My problem is that the break up really screwed my head up for a good year after the break up. For some reason I just couldn't get over it. I haven't even talked to the girl since. It's been almost two years now and time has helped me accept things and I'm over the fact we're not together. I just started college and there are more than enough girls around to take my mind off the past. You'd think I'd get over everything but I don't feel any emotion anymore. I have been attracted to a few girls and their have been some girls attracted to me but I just don't care. It's like I'm incapable of feeling. What's up?
westernxer Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 You're probably just being cautious. Just give it some time and keep your eyes open.
johan Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Fear of being hurt causes this. You can't be with someone else until the fear goes away. And it can keep you from even approaching people. It's mostly subconscious. If you find a decent girl who is patient, it will go away when you learn to trust her.
Yamaha Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 You have become one of the walking wounded. You will get tired of keeping people at a distance and let you heart start to feel. It is inevitable.
scobro Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 You have become one of the walking wounded. I hear that.I am a foot solidier for the walking wounded.I just hope one day I heal because walking wounded is not fun.
JS17 Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 There are people who never heal. I think there are even some on this board. I'm at this healing crap for 9 months already so I'm starting to wonder whether this is permanent for me. You've only been through heart break once though and you're still really young so I think you have a good chance at recovering when the right girl comes along.
scobro Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 I'm at this healing crap for 9 months already so I'm starting to wonder whether this is permanent for me. What are you doing to heal?
JS17 Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 What are you doing to heal? B!tching uncontrollably on LS:laugh:
fudge_cake_89 Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 hey, i know almost exactly how ur feeling, and its good to know that someone else is feeling the same way. my situation is kinda different tho..my heart fell for a guy on holiday, and we shared some pretty special moments just staring into each others eyes. by the end of the holiday i had realised it was something special, but the coach i was on drove away from him and it was too late to do anything..the thing is, i never spoke to him, and so i duno if im ever gona see him again. my mind is completely screwed up, im really confused about what to do next and i cant seem to figure out whats going on in my life. ive 'fancied' a couple of guys at school, but its nothing compared to what i felt on that holiday, and if u say ur still like it 2 years on, im a little scared!
sparticuss Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 The nearest physical analogy that I know of is that if you are shot or seriously injured you dont feel pain casue the body just goes into shock. There was a notable case of a serious burns victiim who tried to get up and leave the hospital not rreasising that he was close to death. The burns had burned out the nerve endings under his skin and he coudn't feel any pain. Freud was the first shrink to demonstrate that emotional damage can cause physical symptoms and this lack of feeling is just one of those symptoms. And you sure aint alone either. Look through any womens trash rag and you will get a whole pile of grizzling about unfeeling and insensitive boyfriends. These guys, like you , have been so badly damaged by past relatioships that they can't feel for new ones. It's serious stuff too with one in thirteen divorced men so badly damaged that they suicide. And there's no garantee that you will get over it.
helena abadi Posted January 9, 2006 Posted January 9, 2006 do you have unhealed wounds over the breakup? they will stop you from opening up your heart again. no harm in seeking a bit of professional advice on what's happening. sounds as tho you would like to test the waters again. that's a great first step. after my most significant breakup, i felt nothing for years. and fear of being hurt again kept me closed off. if you WANT to get over it, you will.
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