NewYorkLove Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 So, after 3 1/2 years I am thinking of asking my boyfriend about going on a "break". I don’t want to totally breakup with no hope of getting back together; I just need some time to myself to figure out what’s going on with me. Here is a little back ground: My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 1/2 years and I am now 21. He and I lived together for two years, but I am back living with my parents now so that I can go to college full time and not have to work and moving home to my old town was not easy! We see each other almost every day, if not everyday. I am a little interested in meeting and hanging out with other guys but I don’t want to date anyone. I never really had the college "experience" and don’t have many girlfriends because he gets a little jealous if I don’t invite him along. I just really need this time to find out more about myself what I want, and make new friends. Is there anyways possible way for me to approach him about this without him feeling like I am totally dumping him? Is a break even a realistic idea? I have never been on one... help?
westernxer Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 Just break up with him... don't give him mixed messages, either. He's going to hurt regardless, but that's why they call it breaking up.
gridiron Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 Just dump him. You DO want to date and see what else is out there, who you can attract. Make a clean break. Don't give him false hope that he clings on to while waiting for you.
downcydeguy Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 OMFG!!! Please look through many of the posts on Loveshack (namely some that I've responded to). You are 21 - period. I have good news and I have bad news....The good news is that you are gonna experience your freedom and "college" life. The bad news is that your boyfriend is about to become a regular on this site because he is going to be completely heartbroken by you. You are going through the same thing that EVERY girl goes through at 21. Not 20, not 22 - 21. I've been trying so hard to figure out what happens but I know this will forever be a mystery. Do yourself and your b/f a favor and don't give him the "I just want a little space right now" speech. You and he are over. Trust me on this one. I don't even know your b/f and I feel really bad for him now. Again, before you respond to this, please read through many of these posts and you're gonna find that EVERY girl magically changes when they turn 21.
Tangerina Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 AHHH.... my BF (ex BF I mean) tried to do that to me, and everyone from me to his mom told him he needed to be straight with me about whetehr it was a permanent break or not but he wouldn't because he wanted to have the possibility of getting back together... result??? the most painful thing either of us has ever gone through.... after a month and a half of being heartbroken and asking to get back together I decided that he wasn't coming back and started to move on... then he did want to come back and I said no way so now he is heartbroken.... I say figure out what you really want and stick with it otherwise it can only end badly.... Hey, I am 20... what is going to happen to me next year?? Now I am scared... I don't think I am that type of person though... who knows, I will let you know next year.....
Milo Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 Your boyfriend gets jealous if you don't invite him along with your girlfriends? Ha. I actually pulled that one once. But at the time, the girl I started dating was friends with another female friend of mine. So my female friend was dissin' me! No, really, you have the right idea. The two of you need to have some time to yourselves. Go make some new friends, both girls and guys. If he is smart, he will do the same thing. Isolating yourselves in a self-absorbed relationship is the fecking pits. Now knock that off and go make some pals.
looneytunes Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 Breakup with him. If you end up staying with him and miss out on the college experience you will only resent him. If you stay together you will resent him and miss out on making some lifelong friends. Or.. you will end up breaking up in a few years anyway and resent him anymore when you graduate without making any college friends. I've seen that happen with a coworker and she sits at home with her mom...
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