reader Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 I'm writing this for a friend. He is a young guy who was/is engaged to a girl he met in high school. They have dated for 5 years. They were engaged and lived together for 2.5 years. She moved back home and stated that she wanted their relationship to be what it was in the beginning - with lots of romance. She wants a bigger engagement ring - at least a carat. She wants him and told him (!) that she wants him to pay all the bills. They have rescheduled their wedding date. She spends the night, but won't live with him. He has given her ultimatums, but she won't tell him anything. He is a basket case. He asked us - his coworkers - what he should do. I said that she should just love him, who cares about the size of the ring or whatever. It's obvious that she is too young to be in this relationship. He is very much in love with her. He says he is just taking one day at a time. I told him that realistically, most people who date in high school don't get married and if they do, they don't stay married. I try not to say too much, because really, this is one of those things where he is just going to make himself miserable until he gets tired of it. I would walk away, but I would like to know what you think. We like this co-worker, he is like our little brother. What do you think? Reader
westernxer Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 I guess he'll have to find out the hard way...
Author reader Posted October 28, 2005 Author Posted October 28, 2005 I feel kind of badly for being so direct, but jeez, asking for a bigger ring? I can see that for maybe a 20th wedding anniversary, but what does it mean that she wants to spend time with him, but not live with him? Why not? I think that's just weird.
whereismylifegoing Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 you can be married to your high school sweet heart it's not hard.......just have to learn to adapt to each others changes in life. this girls sounds like a physco though.......
Author reader Posted October 28, 2005 Author Posted October 28, 2005 Yes, you are right, and that is what it takes for any relationship. However, if she is already acting like this, what will it be like in 5 years? Can this situation get better?
westernxer Posted October 28, 2005 Posted October 28, 2005 Can this situation get better? Probably not. But if he's in love with her, no amount of reasoning will change his mind. It's gonna come down to experience or some sort of epiphany. Hopefully it's the latter, and soon.
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