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How do you go from spending all your time together to no contact?


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Posted

I was seeing this guy for about 4 months and the last 2 months, we were seeing each other every day. Because of certain games we played, we got to the point where we don't see each other anymore. He doesn't call me and I don't call him, but I miss him like the devil.

 

How do people go from seeing each other every day to not even talking anymore? I find that so peculiar. Though I'm not in love with him, I find the loss devastating. I miss him like crazy.

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Posted

I cannot call him. He doesn't want anything from me other than a casual, nonexclusive dating arrangement. I see him everyday but he won't agree to commit to being my boyfriend. He was being evasive and secretive so i created a profile on a friends site and asked him out pretending to be a different gal and he responded and even pursued the gal, while not telling me about it (though he didn't lie, he lied by omission). I told him about it and he was angry about it, mostly i think because i caught him and made him look like a fool.

 

I really can't call him anymore. There has been too many things done by me and by him towards me.

Posted

he has told you he does not want exclusivity with you - He is open for another relationship and what you did made him look a fool!

 

You really need to just tell him EXACTLY how you feel and see his reaction. If you dont try you will never know.

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Posted

I don't think there is anything left to know. I wanted exclusivity. He does not. He's not into me. End of story. What is there left to know? What's left is to move on, but I wonder how people do it? I know all it takes is time, but why does time seem to move so slowly?

Posted

I am in the same situation - But i told HIM i didnt want a relationship, just casual.

Now my feelings have changed but his havnt so i have to let go too. Its hard isnt it

I do think i want him more because he doesnt want me though. If he was keen i probably wouldnt be!

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Posted

Btw Lishy, how are you doing with that guy of yours? Has he contacted you? I just don't understand it sometimes. Why are men so able to spend so much time with someone and not feel attached to them? Whereas we gals get attached so deeply. I just don't get it.

Posted

He came around last week and we had great sex - I realised that all i would ever want from him is sex and cuddles so i havnt called again and i wont!

 

I wont hanker after him missing me and calling - If he was interested i wouldnt have to play games with him and daydream that all of a sudden he will miss me and contact me (If he did i probably wouldnt want him)

 

We all want what we cant have - and we want it NOW!

Posted

I got very confused because when we had sex he was SOOOOOO loving - stroking my face holding my hands and cuddling me all night until morning!

 

How can i guy do this with someone who they cant even be bothered to call? BUT THEY CAN, and they do! Most of my confusion was based on that - I really miss cuddles and he was great at it!

Posted
I don't think there is anything left to know. I wanted exclusivity. He does not. He's not into me. End of story. What is there left to know? What's left is to move on, but I wonder how people do it? I know all it takes is time, but why does time seem to move so slowly?

 

I'm in this same situation, only we dated for almost a year. You move on by putting one foot in front of the other. Sometimes you will literally be just going through the motions and you'll feel down and sad and depressed. Then one day you'll realize you hurt a little less. My ex and I have been apart for 3 months now; we haven't seen each other at all in that time, though we have spoken on the phone and emailed. We're currently in our second round of NC...it's been 5 days so far (the record was 28 days). This time I'm going to make it because I'm stronger and more determined. It WILL get better, trust me. Besides, why would you want someone who doesn't want you (other than maybe just for sex)? We are strong women. We deserve better. I'll find better and so will you. Just hang in there...take one day at a time, one step at a time.

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Posted

Gals, I fell off the wagon. yesterday was his birthday and i sent him an e-card. he responded saying that it was a hard birthday this year and so I called him last night. Well, of course, he hasn't responded and now I feel like an idiot.

 

How do men do that? Be so intimate and so loving and then don't even bother calling you back. I think it's just plain rude. Why am I pining away for someone so rude? It's time to move on! I wish it would go faster than this.

Posted

I SOOOOOO know how you feel - They give a little, just enough to keep you hanging and then POW they are gone!!!!!!!!

 

It hurts but all the clues are there - We just decide not to pick up on them!!!!

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Posted

Good luck to you Allegro. It's very hard, I know, but we can do it.

 

Lishy, this feeling really sucks. I wish it would go away soon... :(

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