Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 Can you confirm this 100%? you sure she did not leave him PADA?? not a good sign... if she left him then he may be usuing you to make her jealous and come back...be mighty careful.\ I am taking it slow and having my eyes as wide open as I possibly can. Why would someone pay big $$ for a matchmaker if they weren't serious about moving forward and finding a lasting relationship. this service told me that if they get negative reports or feedback on me and thought I was playing games, using people, or just using the service for casual dating I could lose my priveledges and still be stuck with the fees. I have to give him the benefit of the doubt and pray that he is being honest and true. If I find out he has lied and manipulated me then it's his loss more then mine. there are other fish in the sea.. I still have8 more matches if I need them. heheheh.
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 His kids confirmed that she is freaky, moody, that they couldn't trust her. One day she was nice then the next three she was a bitch, she woiuld change plans all the time, she would ruin everyones plans or day. She was crazy. I have a gutt feeling that what he has told me is the truth. My gf and her bf feel the same thing.. None of us are that nieve. All of us have lived a lot of life and I think that makes us more sensitive to picking up vibes.
Mz. Pixie Posted October 27, 2005 Posted October 27, 2005 Pada- When I met my now husband, he'd been through almost a similar experience with his ex. He was still healing. If your guy is like mine he was so happy and excited to have someone who was into him as much as he was into them that he didn't know how to act. They hadn't been together as long as the two of them were but it was pretty terrible. One night she made a scene in a bar and everything. She got the picture it was over but here is the thing- You've got it going on, you're a great catch. Even if this guy ends up going back to this woman as the guys here have suggested he might- then it's his loss, not yours! Just keep that in mind.
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 You've got it going on, you're a great catch. Even if this guy ends up going back to this woman as the guys here have suggested he might- then it's his loss, not yours! Just keep that in mind Yes, I know it will be his loss and someone elses gain. I know I am a good catch for the right man. I am multi-faceted, have a big-heart, He calls me everyday, hasnt missed one yet, he sees me as much as possible even if its only for an hour. If he goes back to her then he wont be allowed to come back to me. I don't do seconds or take-backs.. I am a woman scorned you don't get to burn me twice... That is where I become a Biatch and stand my ground! Once burnt by someone I wont allow myself to be subjected to it again.. It doens't matter how much in love I am with the man... I have become hard in this area. I am no ones DOORMAT... Mr. Landscaper has a chance and so far he is using every moment availabe that I know of for me. He works all day, spends time with his kids then the rest is with me. Now that I have met his kids and they like me and were begging to come back my house this weekend. If we don't spend time together with the kids I will see that as red flags. Our familys have met and its all good. There is hardly a reason why we cant spend time ALL together. I told him he is going to have to go get Ice Skates for all of them because that is one of my goals is to get back on the ice this winter.. It's been 3 years I need to skate again. He said OK.. I am praying that we have lots of fun in the snow this winter and we draw closer and continue to build. He is a great guy and treats me very well. I could fill my head with lots of doubts and concerns because of being scorned in the past. But how fair is that. He is not any of my ex's.. He is Mr. Landscaper.. He deserves a fair chance. It is not right for me to make haste based on my past experiences.. I have to take what he says to me and chose to beleive him till I am proven wrong. I am not blinding my eyes so as to not pick up red flags but I am not going to take out on him the scorning I got from past relationships.. Do you understand that Mr. Alpha? Why play devil's advocate? Why place doubts and tension in a situation where you have no reason to... Until I have justifiable cause to doubt I need to be fair..
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 Ha, he just called me to say hi. He was heading for lunch at McD's. YUCK.. Man he needs some real home cooked food.!!! Might be due time to have him over for supper again. hahaha.. I know I'm on his mind..
alphamale Posted October 27, 2005 Posted October 27, 2005 Do you understand that Mr. Alpha? Why play devil's advocate? Why place doubts and tension in a situation where you have no reason to... Until I have justifiable cause to doubt I need to be fair.. Let me get my can of whoop-ass out here PADA. Chances are if he was engaged to a whacko nut-case then he is attracted to whacko nut-cases....that's all I'm saying.
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 Let me get my can of whoop-ass out here PADA. Chances are if he was engaged to a whacko nut-case then he is attracted to whacko nut-cases....that's all I'm saying. I understand what you are saying. BUT I use to be attracted to nut-cases too. I don't want them anymore. When I find myself in that situation I back out.. I have had enough. I am one who has made a choice to not journey down that path anymore.. Don't you think people can change directions? You apparently are trying to find some gap in your ways! Whose to say he isn't doing the same thing..
alphamale Posted October 27, 2005 Posted October 27, 2005 Don't you think people can change directions? the can change PADA but it is very rare especially when people get older. we are much more set in our ways and past behaviour predicts future behaviour 99% of the time. i just don't want to see you get hurt cause you mean so much to me (actually i don't know who the hell you are, but it sounded good) no but seriously, all i'm telling you to do it be careful and be a love detective. take little at face value and do your homework and research. most men are vile, filthy liars (which I can attest to!)
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 the can change PADA but it is very rare especially when people get older. we are much more set in our ways and past behaviour predicts future behaviour 99% of the time. i just don't want to see you get hurt cause you mean so much to me (actually i don't know who the hell you are, but it sounded good) no but seriously, all i'm telling you to do it be careful and be a love detective. take little at face value and do your homework and research. most men are vile, filthy liars (which I can attest to!) AHHHHHHHH U CARE ABOUT ME.. :love: sweet... {giggles} u do remind me of a guy I know... Well what I do hear about him/from him is he has had 2 serious relationships in the last 17 years. 12 yrs of it he was married to a gal he says is needy, clingy, insecure, whiney, weak, need to be taken care of woman, she cant make decisions for herself. She is the mother of their 4 kids. she is short, very petite, blonde and shy Then the last one was 3 years off and on with someone who is stubborn, strong minded, opinionated, loud, outspoken, rude, overly flirtatous with men, overly independant, moody, cold, distant, very flakey, undependable, over powering and can be controlling. She is tall, build like a brick-shyt-house, brunette, obnoxiously loud. So I see a man who has been on both ends of the spectrum and puts up with a lot of shyt from women.. I beleive I am the balance of these two women on a much healthier level.. (As time goes on the investigative side will come out in me. Im not a Scorpio Woman for nothing..... ) my curiousity kicks in and then look out world...
Mz. Pixie Posted October 27, 2005 Posted October 27, 2005 Just a thought here Pada- I'd be very careful of a man who only has negative things to say about his ex's.
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 Just a thought here Pada- I'd be very careful of a man who only has negative things to say about his ex's. He has given both possitve and negatives about them. He talks about them in balance and never calls them names.
Mz. Pixie Posted October 27, 2005 Posted October 27, 2005 Big thumbs up!!!!! That's one way I knew my husband was over his exwife. Even though she cheated and left him for someone else he never really trashed her. He made no bones about the fact that he was over it and that he'd done what he could to save the marriage but she thought the grass was greener on the other side. At no point did he ever call her a whore or anything like that.
Author basscatcher Posted October 27, 2005 Author Posted October 27, 2005 Mr. Landscaper has never called any of his ex's bad names. He has spoken about their faults. He has told me as best as he knows why he stayed and tolerated bad treatment. He still has some soul searching in that area to understand himself. He has shared with me what he endured in both relationships. I know he still has more healing to do.. I let him take the reigns as move as slow as he wants. I am a little hyper sensitive to this situation because of my past so I am on guard but I am also enjoying and cherishing what we are building.. I do feel confident in him but I am still cautious because the last relationship I was in I was lied to for months there was another woman pining away after him (his exlover) and that is who he went back too. So I am cautious but that was him and he is not Mr. Landscaper. They are two different men. So I need to be fair and not judge one for anothers actions.
Recommended Posts