Gaslighting or was I wrong?

[BaileyB]

1 hour ago, Thunderburst said:

This implies that he's a narcissist?

You missed the moral of the story.

Don’t be the mouse. When he tires of playing with you or when you eventually become overcome with exhaustion, pain, etc… he will walk away because he doesn’t care… Why does it matter why he doesn’t care - the important thing is to accept that he doesn’t care and get yourself away…

[Thunderburst]

1 minute ago, BaileyB said:

You missed the moral of the story.

Don’t be the mouse. When he tires of playing with you or when you eventually become overcome with exhaustion, pain, etc… he will walk away because he doesn’t care… Why does it matter why he doesn’t care - the important thing is to accept that he doesn’t care and get yourself away…

So you think by deleting her number yet still talking to her, hes playing games?

[stillafool]

6 minutes ago, Thunderburst said:

No he didn't and he didn't need to considering how hes behaved.  He could easily say he has nothing to talk as he had already deleted her number.

He probably has told you a million times he doesn't want to talk but you continue to run him down requesting to talk to him.  It does him no good to delete you number because you are constantly chasing him.  Girl find someone who actually wants you.

[Thunderburst]

3 hours ago, stillafool said:

He probably has told you a million times he doesn't want to talk but you continue to run him down requesting to talk to him.  It does him no good to delete you number because you are constantly chasing him.  Girl find someone who actually wants you.

He never said he doesn't want to talk. [ ] 

Edited November 25, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[stillafool]

29 minutes ago, Thunderburst said:

He never said he doesn't want to talk. You like to cook up imaginary scenarios don't you

And you like to pretend you're someone else to get the same answers to questions that have already been answered, don't you?

[Calmandfocused]

Can someone post a link to the 1st thread please. Help give us a clue what’s going on. Thank you. 
 

Op even though I don’t have the foggiest what’s going on with you, I gather that you are desperately searching for a ray of hope that a man you are into is also into you? You want to analyse every little nook and cranny of everything he said/ did to prove to yourself that he wants you?
 

Lovershackers have basically told you he’s not into you, you’ve refused to accept it, now you’re continuing the journey  to find that “little ray of hope” ? 
Is this correct? 
 

If so, I don’t need to see the original thread; 
 

If you’re questioning and analysing whether a man is into you, the answer is No. 

There are no mixed signals. If a man is into you it’s an obvious Yes. Anything else is a No. 

Stop lying to yourself op. The biggest issues you have here is you. 
 

Let him go. 

[Wiseman2]

29 minutes ago, Calmandfocused said:

Can someone post a link to the 1st thread please.

 

[poppyfields]

[I read] the previous thread and I agree with @Calmandfocused.

7 hours ago, Calmandfocused said:

If you’re questioning and analysing whether a man is into you, the answer is No. 

There are no mixed signals. If a man is into you it’s an obvious Yes. Anything else is a No. 

Stop lying to yourself op. The biggest issues you have here is you. 

OP, forgive me but your issues (with this person AND yourself) go way beyond what anyone here can help you with.

You are in the throes of an extremely unhealthy obsession and if you don't seek professional help soon, you are going to have a breakdown, the beginnings of which are happening already.  BTDT so I know.

No one here has the ability to answer your questions, the ONLY person who can answer is HIM.

And he's not talking, apparently he doesn't want to talk to you.  That's how it appears anyway. 

It's important you stop telling yourself stories to fit your perception of things which is skewed as facing the reality that's he's not interested is too painful. 

I understand it. 

Please get help for your own emotional well being and sanity. 

Good luck to you. 

Edited November 26, 2022 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
removed quote

[Lisa]

This thread has been closed as the question has been thoroughly answered.  

[Thunderburst]

My fwb and the girl he wanted for a year fell out last month because he disrespected her and denied having any feelings for her even when she told him that she has feelings for him.

 

They never had sex but my fwb seemed like he kind of had developed feelings for her. She used to wear white cardigans and shoes and ever since she started wearing white, he became buying white shirts and started wearing them a lot.

Eventually, she texted him ending their association and he was hurt and upset by it. He deleted her number but kept saying hello to her in person to which she also responded. He stopped wearing white completely after this incident.

 

However, it was clear he actually didn't want to say hello but was only doing it for some weird reason.  However, she texted him again saying she is finished with uni so might not come and would like to see him but later on when she asked to chat, he agreed but said he had archived her chats with him so didn't receive her text. He didn't say whether he deleted her or not.

 

Eventually, she told him how she liked talking to him and was only trying to find a solution for their issues. He initially said that once you bake a cake it can't go back to how it was and how he has no problems with her but wants to move forward as he feels stagnated. She still maintained that she does not want to stay on bad terms or act like strangers and he agreed. 

 

However, almost 2 weeks, he was not really himself and even yesterday, he was miserable. 

 

However, last night he made a fake Instagram account (from my laptop) to check hers which he quickly deleted by morning. And all of a sudden, from today onwards, he began wearing white again.

 

When I reached uni in the afternoon, he kept going outside campus to smoke (4 times) and on the 4th ocassion declined taking me with him even though we were looking for his lost book together. I saw them together and he was asking her about football, telling her how he doesn't like his home team because they have obnoxious and bad mentality who think they know everything. He told her about his holiday plans and when she was coming along with him, he didnt stop her. 2 weeks ago, he did tell her hes going inside and she didnt accompany him but this time he didn't. He also didn't tell her that he's still seeing me.

 

She also told him that she got her library card extended and he said that's good and how she can use the library etc. 

 

After 15 mins of their encounter, he left.

 

Does this mean he has finally move on? Considering he started wearing white and it seems like she no longer bothers him anymore like she used to?