Ive broke with my GF and still cant believe its really happens

[PinkFlamingOnCharge]

We met on facebook, Ive typed to her. We were chatting for three months, then I decided to come to her to kenya for several weeks. (Im white btw) We were dating for 3 months, she took me to the city Voi to introduce me to her family. Ive met her parents, grandma, siblinngs, cousins, aunts and uncles. We agreed to go to one place (mombasa) by a train and stay there for 5 days... So... We entered to train, I joined her little later, like 1-2 minutes coz Ive had bags. There were 4 places as usual. When I came and sit, she already spoke with two guys who sitted on their places across us. They spoke all the time in suahili so IDK what was about. She usually spoke with other people in matatu(bus) so I saw it as normal, but there were always short conversations like maybe 5 minutes. That conversation took whole 75 minutes of our trip. She only once asked me "is everything fine?" Ive been such shocked by that situation and couldnt believe it really happens, that I only said silent "YES" and didnt say even one more word.Its not abt jealous, seriously. I felt like a trash. She ignored me totally like I was invisible. She didnt touched me even, those 2 guys could think I dont know her I let them enjoy. Is that normal? I felt totally ignored and it was just.. sad...
Am I paranoid and made a big deal from small thing? Ive broke with her after we left the train coz I didnt wanted argue in train and stopping their conversation. Ofc she cried, sorry me, explained thought Ive been busy by my phone, didnt wanted to hurt me, that I should correct her at the moment etc
If she would kiss me, hug me or take my hand, I wont be angry even. I swear.
How do you see that ladies and gentlemans?
Ps-She never did to me any bad action, we have been in great moods in our way to train. I really couldnt believe it really happens. Plus using swahili she blocked me to join their conversation and also I couldnt understand them. No, they didnt knew each others, they were two totally stranger guys. I told her we are over cause every random strangers guys are more important than me. And to dont touch me, coz she should touch me at train, and to dont calle me honey, coz she should call me honey at train. But she treated me like I was not there.

[Wiseman2]

31 minutes ago, PinkFlamingOnCharge said:

 When I came and sit, she already spoke with two guys who sitted on their places across us. They spoke all the time in suahili so IDK what was about. She usually spoke with other people in matatu(bus) so I saw it as normal, but there were always short conversations like maybe 5 minutes. That conversation took whole 75 minutes of our trip. 

It sounds like you don't understand the local culture and it caused misunderstandings. However she was quite kind to you throughout, except for chatting in local languages on the train. Mombasa is wonderful. Hopefully you didn't spoil the trip because she spoke with fellow passengers on a train? 

[PinkFlamingOnCharge]

Ive typed in my message I broke with her right after we left the train

[Wiseman2]

1 minute ago, PinkFlamingOnCharge said:

Ive typed in my message I broke with her right after we left the train

It's my opinion that you overreacted especially since 99% of the trip was her inviting you to meet her family, being hospitable and kind, etc. even apologetic that a random train conversation freaked you out. 

[PinkFlamingOnCharge]

For whole 75 minutes trip she spoke with them from 1st to last minute. Didnt touched me even once. Only once said something to me like "are you okay?" or "is everything okay?"
So no, random train conversation didnt freaked me out

[basil67]

While she was rude to not try and include you, breaking up seems like an overreaction on your part.  In your shoes, I would have perhaps smiled and asked what they were talking about to try and get involved in the conversation.   Or I might have stayed quiet and when we got off the train, I would have told her that I felt very left out during the conversation.

Now that you've broken up, where do you plan to stay in Mombassa for five days?  Obviously, you can't stay with her now that you've dumped her.

[PinkFlamingOnCharge]

Ive broke with her right after we left the train

[FMW]

I understand how you felt disrespected, that's understandable.  

I think looking at what happened as part of the larger picture of your trip, and your relationship is important.  I understand how you were feeling, but I believe breaking up was premature.  The relationship was important enough to both of you for you to travel to meet her family.  I think having a discussion where you each try to understand the other's point of view as well as giving things a little time to cool down would have been a better option.  

Edited September 23, 2022 by FMW

[PinkFlamingOnCharge]

Her explain was "you were busy on your phone thats why ive said let me leave you to read" come on thats totally idiotic. Ive took my phone from pocket after 15 minutes when understood something is not right. Plus my roaming didnt work so I havent had internet which she knew. I spent that time by watching my pics....

It was a month ago but I still cant believe it really happens and what exactly was that...

Edited September 23, 2022 by PinkFlamingOnCharge

[bab05]

On 9/22/2022 at 7:31 PM, PinkFlamingOnCharge said:

We met on facebook, Ive typed to her. We were chatting for three months, then I decided to come to her to kenya for several weeks. (Im white btw) We were dating for 3 months, she took me to the city Voi to introduce me to her family. Ive met her parents, grandma, siblinngs, cousins, aunts and uncles. We agreed to go to one place (mombasa) by a train and stay there for 5 days... So... We entered to train, I joined her little later, like 1-2 minutes coz Ive had bags. There were 4 places as usual. When I came and sit, she already spoke with two guys who sitted on their places across us. They spoke all the time in suahili so IDK what was about. She usually spoke with other people in matatu(bus) so I saw it as normal, but there were always short conversations like maybe 5 minutes. That conversation took whole 75 minutes of our trip. She only once asked me "is everything fine?" Ive been such shocked by that situation and couldnt believe it really happens, that I only said silent "YES" and didnt say even one more word.Its not abt jealous, seriously. I felt like a trash. She ignored me totally like I was invisible. She didnt touched me even, those 2 guys could think I dont know her I let them enjoy. Is that normal? I felt totally ignored and it was just.. sad...
Am I paranoid and made a big deal from small thing? Ive broke with her after we left the train coz I didnt wanted argue in train and stopping their conversation. Ofc she cried, sorry me, explained thought Ive been busy by my phone, didnt wanted to hurt me, that I should correct her at the moment etc
If she would kiss me, hug me or take my hand, I wont be angry even. I swear.
How do you see that ladies and gentlemans?
Ps-She never did to me any bad action, we have been in great moods in our way to train. I really couldnt believe it really happens. Plus using swahili she blocked me to join their conversation and also I couldnt understand them. No, they didnt knew each others, they were two totally stranger guys. I told her we are over cause every random strangers guys are more important than me. And to dont touch me, coz she should touch me at train, and to dont calle me honey, coz she should call me honey at train. But she treated me like I was not there.

Personally I think,  please don't take offence,  you judged her too soon, don't get me wrong speaking in suahili probably made you feel excluded,  but if she went that far to introduce you to her family,  that means alot. Jealousy is a killer in relationships 

[PinkFlamingOnCharge]

Yeah thats why I have doubts about whole that action. She introduced me to whole family, even aunts and grandmother-for me its very serious then.  I dont believe you./me/.her/anyone doing it to a random guy. But action in train for me shown she dont care or something like that. Maybe she really wanted to ask for something for example but conversation went so far that she really lost a time or how to call it.  Similar situations are in casino if you ever been-there are no watches on the walls. You going for a while but staying for hours.
So Im wondering if she really coulod dont know she "hurting" me coz just forgot/lost a time. Many people says Im looking for an excuse/justification for her. Anyway Im lost. I feel lost, have a brainwash.
Its not jealously-I dont think they spoke abt date/s** etc. Its about excluding me and treat me like invisible. If there were girls instead guy, I would be sad and angry too. When we met any her friend by accident usually they starting in swahili and I introduced myself in english.