kleaners Posted August 22, 2022 Posted August 22, 2022 I'm on vacation and I had someone reach out to me through Hinge. We've been chatting the past couple of days and I gave her my number this morning and she texted me back. During the conversation I jokingly said if I wasn't on vacation I'd ask you out to dinner. She mentioned she had already eaten, so I said I owe her a dinner, lunch, or beverage when I return (if she's interested). She said yes. I won't be available until Friday and I know a lot of you are against dragging out a first day with texting and phone calls beforehand. So what exactly am I supposed to do between now and then to keep her interest, yet still allow for things to talk about on our date (should it actually happen)?
ShyViolet Posted August 22, 2022 Posted August 22, 2022 Ask her out for an actual date, perhaps for this coming weekend. Set a specific day and time. Let's say Saturday. Once it's scheduled, I would leave her alone for a few days, and then message her a couple days before the date to confirm and establish some friendly conversation again. 2
Maldives Posted August 22, 2022 Posted August 22, 2022 9 hours ago, kleaners said: I'm on vacation and I had someone reach out to me through Hinge. We've been chatting the past couple of days and I gave her my number this morning and she texted me back. During the conversation I jokingly said if I wasn't on vacation I'd ask you out to dinner. She mentioned she had already eaten, so I said I owe her a dinner, lunch, or beverage when I return (if she's interested). She said yes. I won't be available until Friday and I know a lot of you are against dragging out a first day with texting and phone calls beforehand. So what exactly am I supposed to do between now and then to keep her interest, yet still allow for things to talk about on our date (should it actually happen)? I do think you need a level of communication to show your interest. Don't go overboard maybe just say hey. How's your day? Keep it light 1
BreakOnThrough Posted August 22, 2022 Posted August 22, 2022 Keep it light, let her set the pace in texting, 4 days isn't that long, just go with the flow until you meet. 2
glows Posted August 22, 2022 Posted August 22, 2022 9 hours ago, kleaners said: I'm on vacation and I had someone reach out to me through Hinge. We've been chatting the past couple of days and I gave her my number this morning and she texted me back. During the conversation I jokingly said if I wasn't on vacation I'd ask you out to dinner. She mentioned she had already eaten, so I said I owe her a dinner, lunch, or beverage when I return (if she's interested). She said yes. I won't be available until Friday and I know a lot of you are against dragging out a first day with texting and phone calls beforehand. So what exactly am I supposed to do between now and then to keep her interest, yet still allow for things to talk about on our date (should it actually happen)? I’m not sure how old you are but depending on age I find the interim chatting unnecessary. Do as Shyviolet points out and it’s enough. Don’t overinvest in someone you haven’t even met. Enjoy your vacation and be present.
Author kleaners Posted August 22, 2022 Author Posted August 22, 2022 1 hour ago, glows said: I’m not sure how old you are but depending on age I find the interim chatting unnecessary. Do as Shyviolet points out and it’s enough. Don’t overinvest in someone you haven’t even met. Enjoy your vacation and be present. I'm 44, she's 35. The suggestion makes sense, I just worry the interest will wane between now and then. But, yeah, I don't want to invest all that time for nothing.
glows Posted August 22, 2022 Posted August 22, 2022 3 hours ago, kleaners said: I'm 44, she's 35. The suggestion makes sense, I just worry the interest will wane between now and then. But, yeah, I don't want to invest all that time for nothing. Impossible. A person worth their mettle will show up when they say they’re going to show up. No ifs and buts. Expect that of your dates. Save all that love and attention for the right person once you’ve actually met her and have a solid thing going. 2
Author kleaners Posted August 23, 2022 Author Posted August 23, 2022 8 hours ago, glows said: Impossible. A person worth their mettle will show up when they say they’re going to show up. No ifs and buts. Expect that of your dates. Save all that love and attention for the right person once you’ve actually met her and have a solid thing going. We've agreed to meet for lunch Friday, but haven't settled on a place to meet yet. 1
Clarity1 Posted August 23, 2022 Posted August 23, 2022 Don't feel the need to text her every day. A day or two before, message her to confirm your date details. From then, if she confirms, cool, you can get to know her in person, and if she declines, then no love lost right 2
Wiseman2 Posted August 23, 2022 Posted August 23, 2022 On 8/21/2022 at 11:45 PM, kleaners said: I won't be available until Friday. Ok. Mention this and ask if she would like to meet this weekend. The key is to stay on the radar but not seem desperate. That means scale way back on all this banter. Texting is not dating and does not build rapport. 2
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