RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 I keep repeating the same songs over and over again to no end. I'm sure my neighbors are bothered by the same music that may sound mechanical to them due to the endless repetitions. But these songs remind me of her and our love for each other. As I'm about to decide to propose to my current girlfriend, I still remember her as my one and only truest love there has ever been. I don't know what's with her but I was surely smitten by her beauty and humor that I didn't care about the rest --- that she's a single mother, that she had a bad reputation in the neighborhood, that my mother (whom I also love) detests her, that my other relatives don't like her, that we fight often, that she's not that smart (oh I really don't care about that). But every time I hear a love song, especially the most romantic ones, I remember our times together (I'm crying now as of this moment that I'm writing this). All I know is that I feel at home with her, and she feels the same way with me too (again, I'm crying now). At this moment, When Love & Hate Collide has just ended but I'm replaying it again. There is this line that strikes my heart so much. It's coz I'm crazy bout you baby... There are so many things that I don't like about her. However: I love her so much, and there's nothing sweeter than our love for each other. There's something about her magnetic stares, her soft, tender hands, her beautiful face, her voluptuous body. I've seen many beautiful women before. In fact, I've met pretty and smart women propose to me to be their boyfriend, but I don't feel anything with them. There's this beautiful and wealthy commercial model who seems to be attracted to me too... but I don't find her personality charming. This girl, my one and only true love, is different. Oh, I don't care anymore. My girlfriend just sent me the same message all over again. While I'm happy with her when we're together, something just doesn't seem right. She's a lawyer too, has a high-paying job, and my mum loves her. Am I going to marry her because we don't have problems and I'll have a stable, peaceful life with her? Or am I going back to the one whom I can't control staring at? If her beauty fades, will I still love her? But I find my mum to be beautiful still even at an old age of 68. There are just women whose beauty do not fade. There are just women with whom I naturally feel comfortable with no matter the age whatsoever. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 I think she's my twin flame, actually, that other women (more beautiful, funnier, and smarter) simply fade in comparison for the oddest of oddest reasons. @_@ Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 12 minutes ago, RoroHare said: I think she's my twin flame, @_@ Which one? The one you're playing songs about or the one you have to marry? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 The one I'm playing songs about Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 I'm just playing 3 songs now. I could not ask for more When love and hate collide Tale as old as time Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 Just now, RoroHare said: The one I'm playing songs about Is this an arranged marriage? Why are you pining for someone else? Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 This is not an arranged marriage but my mum wants me to marry my current girlfriend because she's smart, successful, and has a high-paying job. But I think I'm still in love with my ex. I love my mum so much too. That's why I feel like I'm being torn apart by the two of them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 When I was younger, I just wanted someone funny. But over time, I realized that I like attractive women too. She's both. Maybe this is the reason I'm in love with her. But everything comes with a price. Everything else about her is not good. But right now, I'm feeling this intense passion that I don't care anymore, and in fact, her imperfections make me feel more deeply and passionately about her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 I'm not sure if these are just emotions. Every time these three songs end, my emotions fade, vanish, and boom, gone. But whenever I hear them again, I'd check on her FB timeline and stare at her face. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 Currently playing this song... You're still the one Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 Always be my baby Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 I'm sorry for flooding this thread. This is very personal to me 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author RoroHare Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 One thing my current girlfriend admitted to me is that she's not being honest with her emotions to me. She said that she's trying to be perfect to me. Knowing that I have bipolar disorder, she wanted to be my happy pill. Now I understood why we rarely fight. I still remember that one glimpse of her smiling at me, fifteen minutes after meeting her for the very first time. I told myself that she's the one. Our first date lasted for seven long hours. Unfortunately, that emotion vanished. I know why. She's not being honest and sincere with me, and almost all her messages are cheery but shallow. Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 11 minutes ago, RoroHare said: .Knowing that I have bipolar disorder, she wanted to be my happy pill. It's hard to tell who or what you are talking about. There is a thread for favorite songs. But you seem to be taking about someone you used to know and someone you're proposing to? What exactly is it you would like to see happening? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 So if I’m reading this correctly your ex is funny and beautiful and you’re still in love with her when you listen to three songs but you’re about to propose to your current gf whom your mother likes but seems insincere. It seems you’re not quite in love with either women but trying to make things work or settle down. Take your time and don’t give in to outside pressure, even from family, marrying someone you can’t trust. Are you being treated for bipolar disorder? Link to post Share on other sites
Rider on the Storm Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 I'm new here because I have relationship questions of my own (sort of). After reading your thread, I feel somewhat lucky in comparison (and that isn't intended to be sarcastic). It does not sound like you are in love with your current girlfriend. Just because she has a good job and your mum likes her is no reason to marry her. Take it from me .. a 40-something divorced guy, only marry someone if you are in love with that person, not because your mum likes them or because they have a good job. I guarantee you here and now you will either wind up miserable or divorced. Put the wedding on hold and really get your thoughts together. I don't know how being bi-polar will play into something like this, but I would sincerely suggest counseling. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 Serious question - are you drunk/high or something? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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