Confusing Relationship---or is it a relationship? HELP ME

[SaddEyes]

Hello All, I am new to the forum, my name is Matthew and I am 23 years old.

You see I got a new job not too long ago and training was two weeks long. Sept 19-Oct 1. So i saw a girl there named Mary. I thought she was flirting with me and she is extremely nice to everybody, so a week after training started I asked her in a note "can i buy you lunch tomorrow". And she said "yes Matthew I suppose" with a smile. So i bought her lunch and we talked. After that lunch though I was so nervous I never really asked her to do anything else.

A week later when training was finished on Friday everybody was leaving and she came over to my car and gave me her number and said call me. So I did and we agreed to get together and I would go to her house and I bought some beer. We wathced some movies and talked and she wouldnt let me drive home because I was drinking so she took my keys and I said I'd sleep on the couch then and she said I could sleep with her. So we kissed and I offered to cuddle her and she said "i feel so comfortable with you".

 

So every few days I end up going to her house after work ( 3AM) and sleeping with her and cuddling her. But it came up she said that she doesnt want a commitment.

 

One night she said "you have a two year old daughter matthew but I want you to know that it wont affect us"

then one night she said " I was with Andrew for two years and we broke up 11 months ago and I never had anything like "this" (cuddling...etc) since then.

 

"i dont know what I want " she said one day

 

One day she called me babe

 

Then she said She doesnt know what she wants but she enjoys hanging out with me and she likes being friends with benefits.

 

When I left work the other day early before her I put a rose under the windshield wiper on her car and she said thats so sweet. Then I sent her a poem on the email last night and she said thats really really nice, call me tomorrow.

 

But these past few days I havent gone to her house because she said her roommate broke up with her boyfriend and they share a room and her roommate doesnt really like me too much.

 

What does this girl want? SHould I break it off? Every time I think about telling her I cant do this a voice in my mind says No because all I can think about is this girl.

 

Matthew

[whichwayisup]

She likes you. Right now her focus is helping her roommate out so just give it afew days... Don't panic yet.

 

Maybe in afew days when you call her, take her out somewhere nice for dinner. Get away from spending alot of time at the apartment until the roommate is feeling better. (Why doesn't she like you, just curious...)

 

Be honest with her and let her know you like her and care for her, but you won't get into a relationship with her until she's feeling ready.

[SaddEyes]

keep the opinions coming! Well her roommate called me at the apartment one day and said that she needed to be picked up and i said yes...then Mary called and said that they would pick her up because her roommate is a big pain in the butt and i shouldnt have to. So later on when Mary picked up Susan the roommate I guess on the way over she said " is matthew like staying here EVERY NIGHT now?" and Mary took offense to that. She barked at Susan about it or something. Then later on Susan mentioned to someone that "The like have sex in the bedroom while im trying to sleep and me and my boyfriend just broke up". (completely untrue, never had sex with her in the room, dont know why she lied about that).

 

But....the first night Mary and I were together she said I was the most caring guy and shes attracted to me and I am sweet, and she said nobody has ever been this nice to her before. She never had "this" before (im assuming cuddling and stuff). She said she feels comfotable with me but she wants no committment. But that dont make sense does it? Like we had sex and it was while we were drunk and I asked her if she regretted it and she said she dont regret it she just wishes she would have waited. But then before we had sex the other day she said "no strings attached?"

 

Do you think this will turn into be more than friends with benefits? It doesnt make sense...We go days without seeing eachother and when I say I missed you she doesnt say she missed me, but she says she has a hard time. she said that the two days she never saw me though that I crossed her mind and she thought "oh I wonder what Matthew is doing"?