JadeStar Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 How long could you go without sex from you spouse or s/o? This is just a hypotheitcal situation. I'm sure it would depend on the situation and if there were other factors involved as well. However, lets say your spouse or s/o either cut you off completely or it became alot less than before. How long could you go without sex before you would say, you know what, I have had enough, see ya? Jade
glittergurl Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Hard to say. I can't imagine my life without my husband, so if I really had to sacrifice the sex part, I would. Although I can imagine we'd end up watching A LOT of porn I wouldnt leave him because of that though, I mean, unless he purposely said he doesn't want to touch me anymore; then that's a different story. But for example, a car accident or whatever that would make sex impossible; that wouldn't make me leave.
slubberdegullion Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Depends on the situation, of course. IMO, one of the basic fundamentals in a relationship is the physical aspect. One could argue whether it's #1 or #2 or #3, but for a man it's pretty much always in the top 5. With that said, there are circumstances which may lead to a sexless marriage for a long period of time. One man I know very well was without any intimate contact with his wife for nearly two years , but that was because she had been involved in an accident and was in pretty much constant pain. But if both partners are physically healthy, and the other aspects of the relationship are reasonably OK, then there's no reason that I can see that a couple shouldn't be intimate with each other on a regular basis. How "regular" is obviously dependent on the couple; some may be OK with once a month, others may get antsy if they're not getting it a few times a week.
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Hypotheitcally speaking if a dry spell continued to persist I would make it known that she either needs to hold up her end the bargain or I will find a young and attractive woman who will. Then I will proceed to f*ck my young mistress as often as I like. Reality version, once the norm of your routine is broken whether that is longer than few days, 2 weeks, a month, etc you have to stop and find out why. I can work with a dry spell so long as I know why it is happening. But I would keep trying as long as it took until I was told no matter the effort on my end that our sex life was over then I would cash in my chips. But I think after 6 months of no sex and no good reason as to why....then TUDOR will be seriously thinking of leaving. The problem with dry spells is it makes people start noticing other "options" that they never thought of before because they were content with their spouse. Some thing to keep in mind!
augur Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 My 2 cents. For starters I must state that I truly don’t know how long I could go in this situation as I am currently discovering that myself. ((Nutshell version)) In my relationship, moving sex down on my list of priorities with my SO has helped in many ways. (once I got past the kicking and screaming time period). It has forced both of us to address other areas of our relationship. The comedy of errors that lead us to this point has helped to strengthen us. That said, I can not stress the importance of communication enough in regards to this matter and the importance of a mediator (counseling/therapy) as well. If you would like me to elaborate more on this, Jade, please let me know – just trying to keep things brief and offer another POV .
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I think I like TUDOR's version...Makes sense. It depends on the reasonings behind the dry spell. IF it was just because life got in the way (that happens) and no effort was being made I'd be very upset, especially if it lasted for afew months. If it's other things, possibly ED or an illness, then it would still bug me, but not enough to leave or start looking elsewhere. I would become a chronic masterbator and probably buy every dildo in sight!
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I would become a chronic masterbator and probably buy every dildo in sight! Come on...like you really need a dry spell to constitute this!
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Come on...like you really need a dry spell to constitute this! Have you been peakin' in my window again???
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Have you been peakin' in my window again??? You know me better than that WWIU, if I were close enough to peak I would certainly pop in and ask if you needed a hand!
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 You know me better than that WWIU, if I were close enough to peak I would certainly pop in and ask if you needed a hand! True...That and maybe abit of tongue, too? ....
Author JadeStar Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 True...That and maybe abit of tongue, too? .... LOL
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 You think I'm kidding? LOL! See what I mean....a dry spell will make you consider options that you never would have before. *Tudor's tongue is twitching with curiosity!*
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 See what I mean....a dry spell will make you consider options that you never would have before. *Tudor's tongue is twitching with curiosity!* Thinking is one thing...Doing is another... Maybe I should get into writing erotica or something parttime!
augur Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I should get into writing erotica or something parttime! I think that you would have some bestsellers if you where to pursure this venture, whichway
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Thinking is one thing...Doing is another... Maybe I should get into writing erotica or something parttime! I think it all goes back to the OP though. It isn't just about dry spells of sex. For some it is not getting their cock sucked in ages or for a women not having their kitty licked. It all matters and as long as you want something you are not getting it leads to wondering thoughts which is not healthy in a committed relationship.
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 LOL, thanks. ON a sidenote...MENTALLY for you all...How long could you go without exploding? I mean no sex affecting you. For me, I DO go rangy after about a week. I really DO need to have sex atleast every other day - When I don't it takes about 2 weeks for me to get used to not having it. But, by then it's happening and all is fine.
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I think it all goes back to the OP though. It isn't just about dry spells of sex. For some it is not getting their cock sucked in ages or for a women not having their kitty licked. It all matters and as long as you want something you are not getting it leads to wondering thoughts which is not healthy in a committed relationship. And accepting things as they are is very important. If a spouse isn't comfy with oral sex, as much as it drives the OP NUTS - Why think about it and desire it if it isn't going to happen...Again, acceptance. Deal with it, learn to realize that it isn't part of your life and move past it. Too many these days will walk out because of those little factors. It's not the most important thing in the world... I miss it but I'd miss my hubby alot more...
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 And accepting things as they are is very important. If a spouse isn't comfy with oral sex, as much as it drives the OP NUTS - Why think about it and desire it if it isn't going to happen...Again, acceptance. Deal with it, learn to realize that it isn't part of your life and move past it. Too many these days will walk out because of those little factors. It's not the most important thing in the world... I miss it but I'd miss my hubby alot more... I'm not saying you have to walk out just because you aren't getting it but I do think you shouldn't have just to give up on ever getting it again. It is a very reasonable request unlike letting you f*ck him in the ass with a strap-on. It doesn't have to be deal breaker but if something is important to you then you should keep talking it out and working threw it and not give up on it. Today it is oral sex, tomorrow it is what TV shows he would rather watch at the expense of you loosing yours....before you know it there is no you and only the version of you that you are left with because you don't want to loose your spouse. Not healthy! Some sacrifice yes but there should be a line!
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I'm not saying you have to walk out just because you aren't getting it but I do think you shouldn't have just to give up on ever getting it again. It is a very reasonable request unlike letting you f*ck him in the ass with a strap-on. It doesn't have to be deal breaker but if something is important to you then you should keep talking it out and working threw it and not give up on it. Today it is oral sex, tomorrow it is what TV shows he would rather watch at the expense of you loosing yours....before you know it there is no you and only the version of you that you are left with because you don't want to loose your spouse. Not healthy! Some sacrifice yes but there should be a line! I see your point, but at the same time, when you've had the conversation for like 10 years on and off, nothing changes, eventually one has to give up and realize that it ain't gonna happen. I haven't completely closed to the door, but I'm getting close to it. That is the only real issue we have - A big one, but that's really the only one. Maybe I make it seem worse than it is because I've posted about it, but honestly I don't concentrate on it much offline. Life goes on... Hey, if I don't like what he is watching on TV, I head upstairs and watch it in bed. Suits me fine and I have no problems doing that at times. He doesn't like what I am watching, he heads upstairs. No big deal.
TUDOR Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I see your point, but at the same time, when you've had the conversation for like 10 years on and off, nothing changes, eventually one has to give up and realize that it ain't gonna happen. I haven't completely closed to the door, but I'm getting close to it. That is the only real issue we have - A big one, but that's really the only one. Maybe I make it seem worse than it is because I've posted about it, but honestly I don't concentrate on it much offline. Life goes on... Hey, if I don't like what he is watching on TV, I head upstairs and watch it in bed. Suits me fine and I have no problems doing that at times. He doesn't like what I am watching, he heads upstairs. No big deal. Don't give up, people do change. I didn't use to like cottage cheese now I love it. One day he may find he likes eating p*ssy after all. And I'm not comparing your p*ssy to cottage cheese just came out that way!
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I'm giving up for now...But, me being me I know eventually it will cum up in conversation again at some point. I like cottage cheese too...And no, my pus isn't like cottage cheese...More like strawberry shortcake.
lilmoma1973 Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 It don't really matter to me but when h hasn't got none from me his testosterone levels go up and he is ill and hard to get along with !!! I guess when im not getting what i want i feel no need in it .. lol
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