its_me_123 Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 Hi there, I have been getting to know a woman over the last month and she has stated that she knows what she is looking for in a guy, being moral and lifestyle wise. I kind of get the moral side of things, but what does the lifestyle side of things mean? Could this be to do with work, or religion (She has never mentioned religion), or something else? Or maybe that the lifestyle would have to evolve around seeing her often? No idea! Any suggestions or ideas as to what "lifestyle" could relate to would be useful :) Many thanks!
Wiseman2 Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 How many dates have you been on? Are you interested in her and more dates? "Lifestyle" and "moral" are very vague ubiquitous terms. Maybe she has baggage from cheaters or underemployed previous BFs, who knows? Are you from the same culture, religion and socioeconomic background? If you like her, get to know her better. That's the only way to find out if you are a good fit.
giotto Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 It's the style of life you lead... lol... but which style does she prefer? This is the question...
Author its_me_123 Posted June 25, 2022 Author Posted June 25, 2022 Thanks for the reply. Not been on any dates yet. We've spent a bit of time chatting/texting. That's what I thought, I have no idea what she means by those terms, but they seem to be very important to her. We are from the same culture, I'm not sure of her religion, but I would guess it's the same as mine if any. She said she doesn't want anyone to change who they are to "fit"
basil67 Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 Well yes, it is important to have lifestyles which work well together - and changing someone never works. Lifestyle is very broad because so many things make us who we are. Could be anything from how many hours you work to how much you drink. Could be whether or not you enjoy substances. From camping to 5 star hotels. Alternate or mainstream. Music festivals or small jazz bars. From whether you're an introvert or love a good party. All in all, it's a combination of all the different things which make you who you are.
Wiseman2 Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 56 minutes ago, its_me_123 said: Not been on any dates yet. We've spent a bit of time chatting/texting. She said she doesn't want anyone to change who they are to "fit" A month of texting/chatting is a bit of a red flag. If she is unwilling to meet for a brief coffee/drink in a timely fashion, say a week or so after contact, she may be a time waster. At this point she may be a catfish, scammer, dating tons of others, be in a relationship, just bored, etc. Meet and You decide if you want a second date. It's the only way to find out if you're even interested.
Gaeta Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 (edited) Why haven't you met yet? To me life style is how you lead your life, are you active or sedentary, are you up early or you're a night owl that sleeps all day, do you watch what you eat or you're a junk food addict, is alcohol important, etc. She doesn't need1 month chatting to figure out if you have smilar life styles. On your end, when she mentionned life style you should have asked her to explain what she means, or what is HER life style. You missed an opportunity to get deeper in the conversation. Not too late though. Ask her. Edited June 25, 2022 by Gaeta 2
smackie9 Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 (edited) So vague. Why not just ask her to elaborate more on what "lifestyle" she's talking about. Edited June 25, 2022 by smackie9 1
Ami1uwant Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 (edited) 4 hours ago, its_me_123 said: Thanks for the reply. Not been on any dates yet. We've spent a bit of time chatting/texting. That's what I thought, I have no idea what she means by those terms, but they seem to be very important to her. We are from the same culture, I'm not sure of her religion, but I would guess it's the same as mine if any. She said she doesn't want anyone to change who they are to "fit" morals… values snd beliefs….no stealing, no cheating. Religious views, being a good person lifestyle….what your interests are and how you are as a person. Lifestyle are things like are you a morning person or a night owl. Are you neat freak or is your place cluttered. Are you vegetarian/ vegan/ don’t eat read meat. Are you someone who drinks alcohol. Do you like to go to dance clubs. Can you live with the person. Do you have enough similar interests like listening to the same music, like same movies/ tv shows. Are there activities you share interest in and value. Someone might have some places they like to visit or hang out. Edited June 25, 2022 by Ami1uwant
poppyfields Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 I don't envision this going well if you are unable to communicate with her what she means. You missed a great opportunity to discover more about her. Don't be afraid to ask questions. That's how we learn whether or not someone is compatible. 2
ShyViolet Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 I'm not sure why you think we can tell you what she meant by that. Don't you think SHE would be the person you should ask? 2
Lotsgoingon Posted June 25, 2022 Posted June 25, 2022 Go out with her if you want. Ask her out. The whole point of going out is that you will figure out what she means, you can ask what she means. She'll elaborate on what she means, and you can explain your own qualities you're looking for in a partner. You go out to see if you are compatible, to see if you are interested. 1
Author its_me_123 Posted June 25, 2022 Author Posted June 25, 2022 Thanks for the advice, really apricate it. Will see how it goes 1 1
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