Ex wife still contacts me

[Johndan123]

Short story, we've been together 13 years in total, 4 years married.

 

4 years ago she found someone and dumped me (she left the house, etc) and I was begging to come back for a month or so, she never did. After a month or so, her new relationship didn't worked and tried to come back but I made my mind and I initiated the divorce. Meanwhile she found another one ( after 2 months from the events stated above) they were taking their relationship like it wasn't tomorrow ( moving together after a few weeks being together, buying a car with credit) and we finally divorced soon after.

This breakup and divorce affected me so much at the time that I was thinking to end my life. However, I started to travel solo, going to concerts, etc, focusing on myself and doing my best to heal my wounds. I've been single since.

All these 4 years she was in contact breadcrumbin me, I stated clearly couple of times that this chapter has finished for me and I don't want to be contacted. ( I never initiated contact with her). That didn't happened, she still texts me once in a while, while being with that guy ( i thought it will be only a rebound relationship). 

Why she still does that? I was thinking that's the end and we ( as I did ) are going different ways in life and close this chapter.

Edited June 21, 2022 by Johndan123

[FMW]

Sounds like she wants to keep a foot in the door, just in case she needs or wants you later.  My ex-husband does the same.

Since you made it clear you don't want any contact with her, block her number so you don't see her texts.  

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, Johndan123 said:

, she still texts me once in a while, while being with that guy.

Sorry this happened. Continue living your life enjoying your freedom.

A divorce is final and the end. Delete and block her and all her people from ALL your social media and messaging apps. No need to stay in touch.

[laylafortheride]

On 6/21/2022 at 5:48 AM, Johndan123 said:

Short story, we've been together 13 years in total, 4 years married.

 

4 years ago she found someone and dumped me (she left the house, etc) and I was begging to come back for a month or so, she never did. After a month or so, her new relationship didn't worked and tried to come back but I made my mind and I initiated the divorce. Meanwhile she found another one ( after 2 months from the events stated above) they were taking their relationship like it wasn't tomorrow ( moving together after a few weeks being together, buying a car with credit) and we finally divorced soon after.

This breakup and divorce affected me so much at the time that I was thinking to end my life. However, I started to travel solo, going to concerts, etc, focusing on myself and doing my best to heal my wounds. I've been single since.

All these 4 years she was in contact breadcrumbin me, I stated clearly couple of times that this chapter has finished for me and I don't want to be contacted. ( I never initiated contact with her). That didn't happened, she still texts me once in a while, while being with that guy ( i thought it will be only a rebound relationship). 

Why she still does that? I was thinking that's the end and we ( as I did ) are going different ways in life and close this chapter.

Ah, this is textbook easy.

She does that because she does not want you to move on and find yourself a gf. 

It feeds her ego knowing that she can have you back if she ever finds herself single again, obviously because she can't handle being single (and if she does get you back, she will replace you soon again).

Probably she is also a narcissist and wants attention.

All scenarios above have nothing to do with lingering love or anything else.

You were plan B once, you will remain always. A plan yes, but a B plan.

You are handling it very maturely, but make sure you cut off ALL contact.

Edited July 1, 2022 by laylafortheride

[stillafool]

If you have no kids together go ahead and block her from contacting you.  I agree she just wants attention because she's probably not getting any right now.  Keep moving forward with your life.