Woggle Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Does anybody here have a spouse or boyfriend or girlfriend with different politics? If so does it cause problems in your relationships? Do you argue a lot about it? During last year's election did it cause tension in your relationship?
lindya Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Does anybody here have a spouse or boyfriend or girlfriend with different politics? Political differences with the ladyfriend, Woggle? No two people share the same views about everything. I'm pretty liberal with my politics, so the only thing I get wound up about is what I view as blinkered extremism. Most guys I've gone out with have veered to the left, and though that generally sits pretty well with me sometimes I've had pretty vigorous debates with them if they're preaching policies that - to my mind - it wouldn't make practical or economic sense to implement. People's politics are in some ways reflective of their basic principles, but often they're also simply a habit (some people will vote a certain way because their parents did)...or they may have been shaped by the particular publications that person reads. If you and your girlfriend are having disputes about politics, the positive way forward is probably to see this as an opportunity to open eachother's eyes and explore different perspectives rather than to get into heated arguments.
Author Woggle Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 I am a registered democrat liberal on most issues but I am pro-gun rights and I hate political correctness. I also think Hoaward Dean would make a great president. My girlfriend is a registered republican that has voted democrat since the 90s. She voted for Reagen in the 80s but everybody makes mistakes.
megabit15 Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Woogle, I have very strong beliefs about many of the personal freedom of choice, morality, and philosophical control issues that extreme right wings try to legislate - but strong beliefs against the extreme left wing fiscal handout policies. If my guy had an equally strong opposite viewpoint against the social issues I am very passionate about, it would - and has - caused problems in my personal intimate relationship (not necessarily a friendship). But only because I am passionate about them. However, isn't there a couple in congress that has been married a long time where one is a democrat and one is a republican? I really don't know how they do it. I guess I have a lot to learn from them. I like Lindya's take on it that it's better to explore the philosophy behind the belief and to explore each other's viewpoints individually rather than to look at a political registration at face value. I think it depends on how passionate the individual is about their stance on the issues involved, not whether they are Democrat or Republican. It also is good to see how respectful and open minded you can remain of each other while expressing differing viewpoints. Sometimes, that is more important than the actual issues you're discussing.
Author Woggle Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 I don't know about congress but james carville and Mary Matalin are happily married and he is hardcore liberal while she is a hardcore conservative. In fact he worked On Bill Clinton's 92 campaign while she worked on Bush sr's 92 reelection campaign. I don't know if I could be with a hardcore right winger. Somehow I couldn't picture myself marrying Ann Coulter.
RecordProducer Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 My BF and I have opposite views on politics; we have completely different feelings about the global political happenings. We had one HUGE fight concerning this and I didn't manage to explain to him how personally I was offended by his views. Anyway, we never discuss it anymore and we accept that our minds differ in that respect. Neither he or I will change the world political scene so arguing about it would be just that - arguing. I try not to take it personally anymore. I don't raise the subject and he doesn't either. If it's raised somehow, we try to agree on the parts we agree on anyway, without mentioning the moot points.
Outcast Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I also tend to think that a person's political viewpoint reflects core values. That's why I wouldn't even bother dating a hard-core right-winger. And I think private gun ownership is stupid.
tanbark813 Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I'm registered as a Republican. On social issues I lean a little to the left but I lean to the right on fiscal issues, the latter of which I consider more important. My last ex was a hardcore liberal. She was so liberal she was actually socialist and believed the U.S. should change to communism. Our differing political views did cause some fights but it wasn't so much because of the differences but moreso how the differences were handled. She would ask me questions or start little debates about issues and if I disagreed with her she would just assume I was stupid or ignorant of the issue or flat out wrong. After a few fights--especially after sitting through Michael Moore's tripe--I finally just told her that I'd discuss politics with her if she was willing to at least listen to the other side, but not if she's going to just sit there and call me an ignorant redneck (I live near S.F. and dress more metro than hick for chrissake ). Eventually our political debates lessened in frequency. We never had an official agreement to stop or anything, but I think both of us just realized that it wasn't worth it to debate with each other. Her friends were all liberals too while most of my friends are conservative. I've also learned that hardcore liberals are some of the most close-minded people on the planet. We were together during W's reelection. That most certainly caused tension. I tried to console her after the election was over until she went off on another one of her "all republicans are retarded hicks" tirades. Anyway, I don't think a person's political beliefs are what is going to cause or not cause friction in a relationship. I think the ability to listen to your partner with an open mind is more important than where you lie on the political spectrum.
glittergurl Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 My husband and I don't always have the same opinions about politics; but politics bore me so much, I just act like an airhead and smile when he starts. I really don't care Those ugly people are so not worth fighting over. It's not like arguing with my husband about it will make the world a better place; it will only mess up our relationship.
Mz. Pixie Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I don't know about congress but james carville and Mary Matalin are happily married and he is hardcore liberal while she is a hardcore conservative. In fact he worked On Bill Clinton's 92 campaign while she worked on Bush sr's 92 reelection campaign. Can you imagine some of the arguments that THEY have had??? I personally could only live with James Carville if someone had removed a large chunk of my brain. Just listening to his constant dribble would be enough to have me commit spousal abuse (just kidding Craig). I'm heavily Republican and have worked for every major campaign since I could vote. The last two years though my interest in that area has waned. When I met my now husband, he never discussed his political likes and dislikes but I could tell he was conservative. When later I asked him he told me he'd voted Republican the last several elections. I have some friends who are liberal. I also have a friend who is gay and is a republican- ironically but I can't imagine being married to someone that was liberal. I just feel too strongly about some issues........
whichwayisup Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Agree to disagree, respect eachothers' visions and thoughts but don't get into discussions about it - Period. It's like doing income tax returns with your spouse! Will cause arguements and put ya in bad moods!
Author Woggle Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 We got into a little debate last night when I said that Ronald Reagen is the most overrated president ever. The funny thing is she hates Bush as much as I do but she thinks Reagen was a good president. I don't get that but we will have ti agree to disagree. Nothing that will hurt a relationship.
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