apertures Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 When my boyfriend adn I first started going out, I was the one who needed space. I felt like it was too much, too fast. Now, 5 months later, I have fallen so, so, so, in love with him. He is the best part of my day. I cannot imagine life without him. So when he said he "needed space", I was crushed. The reason I don't understand it is because of his description. He said that he needs to start spending more time at home, helping out, because he lives with just his (disabled....slightly) dad, and they have a pretty low income. He also says that he can't afford to drive half an hour to see me on the weekends. We do go to the same college, and so we have similar class times, and one class together. I was trying to respect his space and so i asked him, so should I find another ride home tomorrow? and he said no, i will take you home. But i replied with no, really, it is no trouble for me to find some other way...but he got sort of agressive and said, NO, I WILL TAKE YOU HOME. He also spoke of making Friday night our date night. My question is, does him saying that he "needs space" mean that he really does need to spend more time at home, with his family, etc, and that he just used needs space for lack of a better word? Or is he beating aroudn the bush, or what? I asked him if we were okay, and he has reassured me several times, yes, we are good, and that he loves me. I want to give him space, but how? I haven't called him...and I will try very ahrd not to...but I do NOT want to lose touch with him completely. He is faaaaaaar too special for that. He is part of the air that i breathe. Would the occasional surprise, like a short cd compilarion (of NON lovey dovey songs, of course) hidden in his car somewhere for him to find, be too over the top and crowding? I need serious help, I WILL NOT lose him!
expos Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I remember times in my relationships that I had where I kind of wanted to be left alone. I have question for you...is this guy an introverted character? Does he like to spend his weekends completely alone sometimes? I think this might be a normal thing for him to want space. If this guy is a social animal and can't spend a moment by himself....I would be worried if I were you. He might a loose cannon that will hurt you.
impuls3 Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 he may just need his space... the cd idea isnt bad, to show him that even though he has his issues, you are still there for him... i wouldnt be too worried... if this continues for an extended period of time u should try talking to him and be straight forward, dont play guessing games with him
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