meltwithme Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Well I can't take this ‘no contact’ anymore (2 months). The only reasons I haven't broken it tonight: I'm a little tipsy and the advice I got to do the opposite of whatever you want to do. So I'm not really interested in being convinced to stick with the NC anymore, I've read so many posts about it and have prepared myself for more pain. I made a lot of changes over these months apart, I’m stubborn and have decided I just have to try this. I figure if she ignores me I didn’t lose anything more than I’ve already lost and will then be forced to get over it. So I just want advice on anything to change/add to this text. So far I have this: I guess it was for the best we broke up, I matured and learned a lot. I regret smothering you, that was so wrong, I hope you dont resent me for it. I’m much wiser with the girl I’m seeing now and won’t make the same mistakes. I’m a new man and you meant a lot to me so I want to keep in touch. If u still need space it’s cool, but you can call a friendly voice for any reason. I’m happy and hope your doing well.
scobro Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Do you have another girl?If so why do you want your ex to contact you anyway?If you don't and are just saying that do you really think she will come running back to you anyway?I would just keep going no contact if she doesn't contact you then you know she doesn't want you anymore.I would just move on and see what happens but don't contact her.
westernxer Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 I’m much wiser with the girl I’m seeing now and won’t make the same mistakes. Then don't send it to her.
Author meltwithme Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 I've gone on a few dates with her and we fooled around some, but it's not going to be a committed relationship, we both agreed to that. I have to give it another shot with the ex, if she doesn't even want my friendship atleast I will know theres nothing left. Now I'm a little more than tipsy so I will sleep on it for a few nights.
Valentinia Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 Don't mention your new girl - trust me that will just piss her off. Nothing is more annoying than a man who tries to brag that he's got other women after him. It doesn't make us jealous it just makes us wanna barf. Profess your love to her and tell her that you want no one else. If my ex did this right now I'd dive back into his arms.
Author meltwithme Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 do you really think she will come running back to you anyway? In a word, yes. Wow I've already changed it: I guess it was for the best we broke up, I matured and learned a lot. I regret smothering you, that was so wrong. I’m a new man and you meant a lot to me so I want to keep in touch. If u still need space it’s cool, but you can call a friendly voice for any reason. I’m happy and hope your doing well. I feel so bad about smothering her and want to let her know so bad but I guess doing so only makes me look more attached (and the same mistake I made earlier good point westernxer). I finally accepted that she didn't want me anymore to the point where I could feel comfortable talking to her again without letting my emotions get the best of me. I just came out of the depression and felt re charged and want to share that with her and now I can't stop thinking about her again. Booze got to me, I gotta stay off it. This place is awesome, i guess if enough people tell me not to send it it will eventually stick in my head.
J dub Posted October 24, 2005 Posted October 24, 2005 In short, dont do it. She should already know you are aware of the mistakes you made, youre not together anymore right? That should be a lesson in itself. also, I had similar pangs of interest in sending my (then) ex a letter, but decided not to do it because I got some awesome advice here and it made sense -- what if she doesnt respond? How shytty will that make you feel? All this time you gained confidence every single day you managed no contact with her, and now you want to break it all for some text about some stuff she probably already knows? No sense in beating a dead horse, I dont mean that to sound harsh but really...she knows how to contact you. If she wanted to give you a chance to apologize for something you did, she will find you. here's my thread regarding that: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t66568/
Author meltwithme Posted October 24, 2005 Author Posted October 24, 2005 I went out with some buds and feel a little better, my one bud gave me some good advice: time will wash away the bad and let her remember the good. If you don't let that happen it will stay fresh and she won't forgive or forget. She was my first love & my first real heartbreak so it has been a deep struggle. I'll always regret it took losing her for me to learn from it but it's making me get over many of my insecurities. I think the fact that she won't get to see that is whats getting to me now. I don't want her to remember me as the emotional wreck I was at the end. I hope she will remember the good and it tears me up not being able to do anything about it. Man I ****ed up bad, just got to try to get over it and force myself to mature from it.
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