Shining One Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 I read the thread about the girlfriend being jealous of her boyfriend's attractive female personal trainer and it made me think about this. If a personal trainer is enough to spark jealousy, I wonder how women would react to my situation. Over the course of the pandemic, I've added four local female Twitch/OnlyFans content creators to my client list. I provide IT services to them. I do not utilize any of their services. The work does involve me spending time alone with them at their homes. Women, how would you feel about dating a guy in this situation? While I haven't dated anyone long enough in recent years to reach the disclosure stage, I expect this will come up at some point.
Alpacalia Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 (edited) It's your business but no, I wouldn't be interested in dating you. As with anyone else, I understand sex workers need IT services as well. No relation to you; too much room for potential conflict, and I wouldn't want to be in such a position voluntarily. Edited April 5, 2022 by Alpacalia 4 1
introverted1 Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 I don't see this as analogous to the guy who sought out a bikini model as his trainer. He could just as easily have selected a male trainer. In your instance, these women came to you (presumably); you didn't seek them out. That said, I would be curious to know how/why your business managed to be on the radar of 4 local 'sex workers.' 3
Author Shining One Posted April 5, 2022 Author Posted April 5, 2022 19 minutes ago, introverted1 said: That said, I would be curious to know how/why your business managed to be on the radar of 4 local 'sex workers.' Word of mouth. One of the women attended a party at an existing client's house where some of my work was showcased. She contacted me, I did some work for her, and she then recommended me to the other three women. The vast majority of my client base is from word of mouth. 2
introverted1 Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 3 minutes ago, Shining One said: Word of mouth. One of the women attended a party at an existing client's house where some of my work was showcased. She contacted me, I did some work for her, and she then recommended me to the other three women. The vast majority of my client base is from word of mouth. Ok, this makes sense. I probably wouldn't love it, but it wouldn't be a deal-breaker, either. 2 1
stillafool Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 It wouldn't bother me because business is business. As long as you charged them and they paid you with money ONLY. 3 1
flitzanu Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 that might be a tricky sell. i mean, they are still just "girls" and you're doing IT service. it's not like you're their photographer or editor right? you're helping with tech issues and interacting with them fully clothed like normal humans 1
glows Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 I don't have any issue with the business aspect of it but may have another opinion about you (I don't and this is just hypothetical as I don't know you). Why people are turned off or upset usually doesn't occur in a vacuum or isn't mutually exclusive of other issues. It may be an accumulation of behaviours or events that eventually give the read that someone isn't trustworthy or not someone you'd want to spend time with. 4
Wiseman2 Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 1 hour ago, Shining One said: I've added four local female Twitch/OnlyFans content creators to my client list. I provide IT services to them. I do not utilize any of their services. I would not view this any differently if you were a store clerk, accountant, plumber, whatever. People need certain services and that's that. You're not bartering so, what's the difference? 3
Els Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 (edited) Twitch...? I mean, I get that there are "sex workers" on Twitch who dress up in bikinis and do ASMR and hot tub streams, but it doesn't allow explicit sexual videos or even nudity, right? Anyway, I'm 100% fine with it. Sex workers go to the hospital, after all, and H has to see them because you can't just refuse to treat a patient. As others have mentioned, they are just people who need services, and even if it was an option I wouldn't WANT him to refuse them treatment anyhow. Now if you were partnering with them, business or otherwise... Edited April 5, 2022 by Elswyth 1
SingFish Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 1 hour ago, Shining One said: I provide IT services to them. I do not utilize any of their services. The work does involve me spending time alone with them at their homes. Women, how would you feel about dating a guy in this situation? While I haven't dated anyone long enough in recent years to reach the disclosure stage, I expect this will come up at some point. Why would it come up? Shouldn't your professional work be basically confidential? Best not to discuss other people's business too much! 3
Els Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 1 minute ago, SingFish said: Why would it come up? Shouldn't your professional work be basically confidential? Best not to discuss other people's business too much! I think it would look super dodgy if he didn't talk about it at all even months down the road, and she found out that he was paying them a visit. "Confidentiality" just means that you can't disclose their names/addresses/other personal info. It doesn't prevent you from saying "one of my clients is a sex worker".
SingFish Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 31 minutes ago, Elswyth said: I think it would look super dodgy if he didn't talk about it at all even months down the road, and she found out that he was paying them a visit. Why?
Weezy1973 Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 Doesn’t make sense for this to be an issue. You’re in business and have to take clients. How attractive they are is irrelevant. If you only accepted attractive women as clients then that would raise some eyebrows, but how could a business even survive if that was a thing? 2
glows Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 Some disagree with that line of work and that’s the gray area. It’s not based on logic so much as opinion or personal belief. His partner can make the decision whether she wants to continue seeing him. 1
SingFish Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 1 minute ago, glows said: Some disagree with that line of work and that’s the gray area. It’s not based on logic so much as opinion or personal belief. I can't imagine why it would even come up as a discussion. I know loads of people's private business in my work and don't discuss it with anyone! 2
glows Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 1 minute ago, SingFish said: I can't imagine why it would even come up as a discussion. I know loads of people's private business in my work and don't discuss it with anyone! I can see both sides and am not for or against this aspect of it. What you’re not realizing is that some individuals have different opinions as you. If he senses it’s an issue (I’m talking about the OP) then discuss it with his partner. 1
Els Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 33 minutes ago, SingFish said: Why? Because couples that have been together for a long time (and potentially see each other every day) typically talk about their workday after they get back home? If it didn't come up even once it would just seem like he's trying to hide it. 1 1
SingFish Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 21 minutes ago, glows said: What you’re not realizing is that some individuals have different opinions as you. If I had a judgmental opinion of sex workers ( or someone ) I just would not do the work. My work tends to be confidential @Elswyth so I don't discuss it. 3
glows Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 8 minutes ago, SingFish said: If I had a judgmental opinion of sex workers ( or someone ) I just would not do the work. The question was how would you feel if you were dating a guy in the OP's situation. Not what would you do if you were presented potential business in this line of work. I think we might both agree though that if his partner took issue with his work or clients and he disagrees then there's incompatibility. They're free not to date one another.
Els Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 12 minutes ago, SingFish said: My work tends to be confidential @Elswyth so I don't discuss it. IT typically isn't, though. I mean, yeah, like I said, you can't disclose specific details, but talking about an anonymous client is almost certainly fine unless you're working for the military or something. 1
Alpacalia Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 1 hour ago, glows said: I don't have any issue with the business aspect of it but may have another opinion about you (I don't and this is just hypothetical as I don't know you). Why people are turned off or upset usually doesn't occur in a vacuum or isn't mutually exclusive of other issues. It may be an accumulation of behaviours or events that eventually give the read that someone isn't trustworthy or not someone you'd want to spend time with. Yes, I agree. Everybody has deal breakers. Some males are attracted to women who are dramatic and enjoy the babe in the woods tropes. Don't really consider those men too trustworthy. 3
poppyfields Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 (edited) Shining, I wouldn't have a problem with it unless you shared with me how attractive and HOT they were, like the OP in the other thread did. But other than that no, you have a business, you need clients and they came to you. Different from specifically seeking them out, like the OP in the other thread did with his hot, bikini model PT. Which I found a bit suspect, but I can be jealous and territorial sometimes when in a relationship so nevermind me. Edited April 5, 2022 by poppyfields 1
SingFish Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 16 minutes ago, Elswyth said: IT typically isn't, though. I mean, yeah, like I said, you can't disclose specific details, but talking about an anonymous client is almost certainly fine unless you're working for the military or something. There's so much more interesting to talk about than work!
poppyfields Posted April 5, 2022 Posted April 5, 2022 2 minutes ago, SingFish said: There's so much more interesting to talk about than work! I agree and I think mentioning it would be asking for trouble, I mean why would you? That would be like announcing there should be cause for concern, when in truth they're just clients like any other client or should be. 1 1
Recommended Posts