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Is he interested or just being nice?


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Posted

A few weeks ago I met a guy in a bar who I had a one night stand with. But in the last week and a half we have gone to the cinema, out for dinner and out drinking together- each occasion I've asked him out qnd he's said yes straight away.
Nothing has happened  like no holding hands, kisses etc just a hug hello and goodbye. I just invited him over on the weekend for drinks and a takeaway ( I said he's welcome to stay over)  after he finishes work at midnight and he said he would come.
He is 10 years younger than me.
But is he showing an interest or just being nice?

Posted (edited)
14 minutes ago, siany666 said:

A few weeks ago I met a guy in a bar who I had a one night stand with. But in the last week and a half we have gone to the cinema, out for dinner and out drinking together- each occasion I've asked him out qnd he's said yes straight away.
Nothing has happened  like no holding hands, kisses etc just a hug hello and goodbye. I just invited him over on the weekend for drinks and a takeaway ( I said he's welcome to stay over)  after he finishes work at midnight and he said he would come.
He is 10 years younger than me.
But is he showing an interest or just being nice?

He's agreeing to spend time with you.  That's literally the most obvious indicator that he's interested.  Is there a deeper meaning that you attach to "interest?"

Edited by dramafreezone
  • Like 1
Posted
1 hour ago, siany666 said:

A few weeks ago I met a guy in a bar who I had a one night stand with. But in the last week and a half we have gone to the cinema, out for dinner and out drinking together- each occasion I've asked him out qnd he's said yes straight away.
Nothing has happened  like no holding hands, kisses etc just a hug hello and goodbye. I just invited him over on the weekend for drinks and a takeaway ( I said he's welcome to stay over)  after he finishes work at midnight and he said he would come.
He is 10 years younger than me.
But is he showing an interest or just being nice?

I’m interested in a booty call too……

 

he realizes the age difference and is just having fun.  I don’t seeing anything more happening.

  • Like 2
Posted
1 hour ago, siany666 said:

A few weeks ago I met a guy in a bar who I had a one night stand with. But in the last week and a half we have gone to the cinema, out for dinner and out drinking together- each occasion I've asked him out qnd he's said yes straight away.
Nothing has happened  like no holding hands, kisses etc just a hug hello and goodbye. I just invited him over on the weekend for drinks and a takeaway ( I said he's welcome to stay over)  after he finishes work at midnight and he said he would come.
He is 10 years younger than me.
But is he showing an interest or just being nice?

All that is interest.  He may be more hesitant on the public displays of affection, may just be him or the age gap or not wanting to send "boyfriend" signals so soon.  

If he hangs out with you he does enjoy your company and/or is interested in sleeping with you again.  On those other nights just may have had to get up early etc.

He may be tired, having worked until midnight, but with that in mind you probably can readily seduce him :)  The key to such seduction in my mind is he comes over and can just relax, with a drink and food handed to him...that's an aphrodisiac after a long days work.

Posted
11 hours ago, siany666 said:

He is 10 years younger than me.
But is he showing an interest or just being nice?

It seems like he likes you however it's hard to tell if he's just along for the ride because you are pursuing so hard.

  • Like 3
Posted

Let go of the steering wheel here and give him the chance to initiate, OP

Otherwise you’ll never know if he’s actually interested or just going along with it.
 

  • Like 5
Posted
15 hours ago, siany666 said:

A few weeks ago I met a guy in a bar who I had a one night stand with. But in the last week and a half we have gone to the cinema, out for dinner and out drinking together- each occasion I've asked him out qnd he's said yes straight away.
Nothing has happened  like no holding hands, kisses etc just a hug hello and goodbye. I just invited him over on the weekend for drinks and a takeaway ( I said he's welcome to stay over)  after he finishes work at midnight and he said he would come.
He is 10 years younger than me.
But is he showing an interest or just being nice?

This sounds like an fwb. It lacks spark and romance but there’s enough physical chemistry for sex (he agrees to come over and spend the night).

I don’t really see anything here that suggests he’s deeply interested in you. Does he ask you questions about yourself, seems interested at all in your life, any similar interests, is he passionate about anything? If he’s 10 years younger he may not even know how to connect with you emotionally and so he seems uninterested. You’ll have to see for yourself whether this is worth your time.

  • Like 1
Posted

He's interested enough to go somewhere when you invite him.  Doesn't seem like he's making any romantic or sexy moves though.  

If you're enjoying it, nothing wrong with having a new friend to go to movies with etc.   If you want romance it's probably a good idea to step back.  Whether or not he takes initiative will tell you what you want to know.

  • Like 3
Posted

The way to find out if he's actually interested in being with you is to fall back and wait for him to contact you and ask to see you.  Stop chasing him because he may just be going along for something to do.  He isn't making romantic moves on you which is telling.  Let him lead next time.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

OP, you're getting a wide range of answers because you haven't really defined what "interest" means to you.  The way you've used that word is ambiguous.

To me interest is the bare minimum to go out on a date, so to me it's apparent that he's interested.  Interest to me meets a very low standard/threshold.  Do you mean interested as in a sexual relationship, an exclusive relationship, possibly marriage?  There's a possible wide range of interest, so it's difficult to really help you unless you're more specific.

Edited by dramafreezone
  • Like 1
Posted

You say that each time, you were the one to ask him out.  Now stop chasing him so hard and see if he asks YOU out.  You shouldn't be the one to always initiate.

Posted

Look, instead of waiting to see if he does anything, why don't you tell him straight 'I really like you and would really like to see if we could have a relationship'. You will know then and there if he wants the same thing or not.

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