Amanda92 Posted January 13, 2022 Posted January 13, 2022 How to be optimistic after several bad experiences and months on dating apps? I am a young pretty girl, but I feel that I start behaving like a cranky old lady that has 10 cats and hates men. Instead of thinking "maybe he is a nice guy", I think about things that may be wrong "maybe he is addicted to an alcohol, maybe he smokes cigarettes, maybe he is shorter than me"... I am sure guys may feel that energy... I would like to be in a relationship, but I think even if I meet someone I push they away... 1
BaileyB Posted January 13, 2022 Posted January 13, 2022 In moments when I felt like this, I took a break from dating. I spent time doing the things that I enjoyed doing. I spent time with friends and family. Sometimes, you just got to let go and take care of yourself - 4
Author Amanda92 Posted January 13, 2022 Author Posted January 13, 2022 2 minutes ago, BaileyB said: In moments when I felt like this, I took a break from dating. I spent time doing the things that I enjoyed doing. I spent time with friends and family. Sometimes, you just got to let go and take care of yourself - How long are usually your breaks? I think I got addicted to dating...
ccas93 Posted January 13, 2022 Posted January 13, 2022 I agree, let go and focus on yourself. I call the apps mediocrity apps now. If you are a young and pretty woman, you can meet men as just a byproduct of living your life. 2
Weezy1973 Posted January 13, 2022 Posted January 13, 2022 Yes, breaks are good. Online dating really is a numbers game so you have learn to roll with it. If you start getting jaded, it’s time for a break. 1
Author Amanda92 Posted January 13, 2022 Author Posted January 13, 2022 I think y'all are right, but it's so difficult because I got addicted to dating during last 2 years and I think that maybe one more week and I will find someone... Maybe I should focus more on my friends. 2
Gaeta Posted January 13, 2022 Posted January 13, 2022 (edited) I took several small breaks, about 1 month each time. When l got back online the crowd had time to change and you discover new prospects. If you are always online then you over expose yourself and men don't see you anymore you're like a flower on a flower paperwall. Delete everything for one month. The first days you'll feel you may be missing an opportunity, it passes. Edited January 13, 2022 by Gaeta 1
Foxhall Posted January 13, 2022 Posted January 13, 2022 12 minutes ago, Amanda92 said: because I got addicted to dating during last 2 years and I think that maybe one more week and I will find someone.. No thats like the gamblers mentality- one more week and what happens they lose all their money, or in dating terms grow more frustrated, as you say, you are a young pretty girl, give the dating apps a break for 3-6 months and let them (the guys) come to you. 2
glows Posted January 14, 2022 Posted January 14, 2022 I don't have much experience with online dating (have not used it for long, about a month recently in 2020). I would think shrinking the age range and adjusting the settings to a narrower search might help. Don't answer all the messages and screen using phone calls. You can tell a lot through a single phone call before meeting. Aim for one potential match a week. I didn't feel burnt out or upset using it. But I don't think it's for me.
Author Amanda92 Posted January 14, 2022 Author Posted January 14, 2022 24 minutes ago, Foxhall said: No thats like the gamblers mentality- one more week and what happens they lose all their money, or in dating terms grow more frustrated, Omg... you are so right! 1
Ami1uwant Posted January 14, 2022 Posted January 14, 2022 3 hours ago, Amanda92 said: How to be optimistic after several bad experiences and months on dating apps? I am a young pretty girl, but I feel that I start behaving like a cranky old lady that has 10 cats and hates men. Instead of thinking "maybe he is a nice guy", I think about things that may be wrong "maybe he is addicted to an alcohol, maybe he smokes cigarettes, maybe he is shorter than me"... I am sure guys may feel that energy... I would like to be in a relationship, but I think even if I meet someone I push they away... look at the positives when you date not the negatives. Anyone you date you can find these negatives, or hypothetically think of negatives that don’t 3cidt. if the date goes well…have a second on3 before you judge.
smackie9 Posted January 14, 2022 Posted January 14, 2022 I went through the same thing....I took about a year and a half off. I was just so sick of it.
vla1120 Posted January 14, 2022 Posted January 14, 2022 20 hours ago, Amanda92 said: I think y'all are right, but it's so difficult because I got addicted to dating during last 2 years and I think that maybe one more week and I will find someone... Maybe I should focus more on my friends. Don't do this to yourself. You might end up "settling" for someone who's not really what you are looking for. This is what my daughter kept doing and she was settling, overlooking red flags, hoping to make it "work." Now, she is so jaded by the process that she won't do online dating and has resolved herself to either meeting someone organically, or spending the rest of her life alone with her cats. Yes, focus more on your friends, for now! 1
Recommended Posts