The Online Dating World is so Fake

[Heartbreat]

The fact that you have to be Don Juan for a girl not to block you, and even then she might not even want to meet up, only confirms that most of these attractive girls only want a guy with pushback, who has options, a lot of friends, blows them off occasionally, isn't always agreeable, is flirtatious, held in high regard by her friends, etc etc etc. They don't want a cultured nice guy; they want a guy who has the potential to start yelling at them or ordering his boss around.

In my experience, girls tend to love obnoxious guys who "put themselves out there", even though they are doing so because they are actually insecure because they know they're not the most intelligent, so they have to market themselves as fun and sociable while wearing suits to give the appearance of success. Unfortunately, women invariably fall for this because the people who are actually successful and don't feel the need to prove themselves to the world come across as boring and predictable beta males. 

Another issue with online dating is that the girls operate off of groupthink (social validation from their friends) and they think by association. Also, anything innocuous that you say gets turned into something completely different because they aren't very smart and think that you just want to sleep with them. But the most annoying thing is how they come up with these preconceived notions of who you are without really knowing you. My dental situation has proved all you need to know about online dating. I get porcelain veneers in a month and upload some new photos of me at interesting events and watch how quickly the tides turn. Total joke

I wish girls those sites were legit and not just window shopping, but I guess that's what you get on a site based on superficial premises. Thoughts on online dating?

[Foxhall]

43 minutes ago, Heartbreat said:

They don't want a cultured nice guy; they want a guy who has the potential to start yelling at them or ordering his boss around.

I dont know really if what you say is true,

I assume you know better than me,

I disagree with your statement above (thats a curious one, though I can actually relate to an experience that suggests there is a grain of truth in it) but not dwelling on it.

In my experience, I found online to be broadly reflective of society in general, they came in all shapes and sizes,

one thing I found and I think even posted here about it was that generally the women online appear quite confident in themselves or at least fake that confidence,

in essence, they or a lot of them anyway, have that barrier or initial guarded nature up ,which can make them appear a little cold particularly for a shyer guy to gel with,

its really all about having a thick skin, coming back for more after knockbacks and staying in the game,

I suppose where some guys have more success, they are better at breaking the barriers down, better at talking, putting the lady at ease and helping her to open up,

with practice every guy can become successful though at the dating.

(I speak particularly about aged 30 + ladies- the younger scene I imagine is more carefree now)

[Gaeta]

3 hours ago, Heartbreat said:

 They don't want a cultured nice guy; they want a guy who has the potential to start yelling at them or ordering his boss around.

Then you're attracted toward toxic dysfunctional women. Before making such a ridiculous general statement on women about revising why you are attracted to these women.

[SoulCat]

3 hours ago, Heartbreat said:

But the most annoying thing is how they come up with these preconceived notions 

 

Oh, the irony. 

[LuckyM]

What you say has been said many times on LS over years and there's no definite answer.

Personally, I gave up long ago even with an excellent photo. They will find a reason to ignore you. Anything.

We can't change online dating...people's attitudes have to change and that is highly unlikely. It was this way 10, 20 or more years ago.

Before  computers people actually wrote letters to a post office box, and that was unreliable and iffy too. Judging from LS comments, it is not optimistic

but I have known couples who met and married from online. Older. Plenty of Fish is notorious. Well, you could try foreign-born ladies

who have a different outlook on this. Such as Asian. Or search in a wider geographic area.

 

[Trail Blazer]

The fact that I dated many women who were very attractive and are nothing like you describe tells me that you're frustrated and projecting, rather than speaking with any scientifically varified data.

There are plenty of attractive women out there who do not want to date or are in any way attracted to douchebags.  I treat women with respect and its appreciated.  I've never been knocked back for a second date, and never been short of a first date, either.

I may have just got real lucky, it's possible, but I met the most intelligent, caring, gorgeous woman in 2019 on Bumble.  She highly educated, comes from a great family and cannot stand the kind of guys your sweeping generalization suggests she'd be into.

You've got to stop indulging in the Red Pill, bro.  It's no good for anyone.  Get your teeth fixed, fix any other areas of your life and focus on your own goals.  I'm not saying that it will happen, but it did for me; when I least expected meeting someone special, that's when I did...

[BaileyB]

11 hours ago, Heartbreat said:

Thoughts on online dating?

It’s not an opinion of online dating, but I do think you make a lot of assumptions… about a lot of different things.