Jump to content

Why [did he] do this ?

Emma7897

By Emma7897
in Dating

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
Posted (edited)

[Our] contact ended then he begged to talk to me again. Then [our] contact ended again. Why do [people] beg for you back just to let the contact die?

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted

Who are you talking about? A BF? A date you went on? Someone you chatted with online? And what exactly do you mean by on/off contact?

The best thing to do is talk to trusted adults about appropriate dating and appropriate online communication . You also need to research dating safety and appropriate boundaries with men.

 Get a good, well written (and clear) profile and recent pics on quality dating apps and start meeting men in a public place, in your own vehicle, in the daytime for a brief coffee.  Delete and block anyone who won't meet in a timely fashion and on your terms. Do Not Chitchat endlessly or date people from a distance.

Girl Fade Away Established Member

Girl Fade Away

Posted
Posted (edited)
8 hours ago, Emma7897 said:

[Our] contact ended then he begged to talk to me again. Then [our] contact ended again. Why do [people] beg for you back just to let the contact die?

He may be the type of person who wants what he cannot or does not have.  When you are in contact, he "has" you and becomes restless and bored.  When contact ends, he no longer "has" you, and he becomes excited about you again.   Lather, rinse, repeat.

Stay away from these types is my best advice.   Go no contact and STAY no contact.  Block him if you have to, it's exhausting playing that game.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
  • Like 1
Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted

You might be Plan B or Plan C.  He wanted to keep you on the back burner while he went after his Plan A.  If his Plan A fell apart, he would pick back up with you.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
  • Author
Posted
2 minutes ago, Happy Lemming said:

You might be Plan B or Plan C.  He wanted to keep you on the back burner while he went after his Plan A.  If his Plan A fell apart, he would pick back up with you.

What if you never initiated anything he always did ? 

glows Established Member

glows

Posted
Posted

I do not know why people do this. I usually leave them begging. It is ok to walk away.'

Ignore any messages from individuals you can't trust or don't like overall.

  • Like 1
Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted
8 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

What if you never initiated anything he always did ? 

So? You deleted and blocked him, no?

Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
5 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

What if you never initiated anything he always did ? 

So he was attempting to communicate and/or date you and (at some point) he just fell silent?? Is that what happened??

Again (it is possible), he was keeping you as a plan B (or plan C)... keeping up just enough communication to keep you on the hook.  If his "plan A" woman worked out, then he would just go silent with you.  If his "plan A" woman didn't work out, then he starts communication back up with you and starts to reel you in.

smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
Posted

easy, he's juggling girls he talks to. When one isn't available, he moves onto the next etc. or his GF isn't around so he chats you in secret.

  • Author
Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
  • Author
Posted
1 minute ago, Happy Lemming said:

So he was attempting to communicate and/or date you and (at some point) he just fell silent?? Is that what happened??

Again (it is possible), he was keeping you as a plan B (or plan C)... keeping up just enough communication to keep you on the hook.  If his "plan A" woman worked out, then he would just go silent with you.  If his "plan A" woman didn't work out, then he starts communication back up with you and starts to reel you in.

Well I told him we were just friends ??? 

smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

Well I told him we were just friends ??? 

Well maybe he is crushing on you and hopes you will change your mind. Maybe he is struggling to let go, pushes away but can't help himself.

Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

Well I told him we were just friends ??? 

Was this a dating app? Why did you tell him this? Are you friends?

Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, Emma7897 said:

Well I told him we were just friends ??? 

OK... so you released him to go attempt to find someone to date and have a relationship with. 

And as a friend, his communication with you is now sporadic??  Have you changed your mind and now you wish to date him??

I'm a bit confused... can you clarify??

  • Like 1
Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted (edited)

[ ] 

Is this the same man?:

 

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
civility
  • Like 4
  • Author
Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
  • Author
Posted
6 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

Are you going to want to delete the thread after 5 pages of good responses? 

Is this the same man?:

 

Nope different 

  • Author
Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
  • Author
Posted
13 minutes ago, smackie9 said:

Well maybe he is crushing on you and hopes you will change your mind. Maybe he is struggling to let go, pushes away but can't help himself.

He would always ask me what we are and I would say idk ? 

Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

He would always ask me what we are and I would say idk ? 

So if you don't know, how would he??

It appears you have changed your mind about being friends and now you wish to date him... so communicate your intentions to him and see if he follows through.

For me... I don't date someone who is "wishy-washy".  If the woman says "no" to dating me, I move on. 

  • Like 1
stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Emma7897 said:

Are contact ended then he begged to talk to me again. Then are contact ended again. Why do men beg for you back just to let the contact die?

I though you blocked him?

  • Like 1
Wiseman2 Established Member

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted
8 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

Nope different 

Ok but it seems like a recurrent problem, no? You wonder why a man ceases contact after you friendzone them, right?

  • Like 2
  • Author
Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
  • Author
Posted
2 minutes ago, stillafool said:

I though you blocked him?

This is a different guy 

  • Author
Emma7897 Established Member

Emma7897

Posted
  • Author
Posted
5 minutes ago, Happy Lemming said:

So if you don't know, how would he??

It appears you have changed your mind about being friends and now you wish to date him... so communicate your intentions to him and see if he follows through.

For me... I don't date someone who is "wishy-washy".  If the woman says "no" to dating me, I move on. 

Well I’m guessing he didn’t care to label it. He kept asking me what are we? How was I supposed to know 

stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted
15 minutes ago, Happy Lemming said:

So if you don't know, how would he??

It appears you have changed your mind about being friends and now you wish to date him... so communicate your intentions to him and see if he follows through.

For me... I don't date someone who is "wishy-washy".  If the woman says "no" to dating me, I move on. 

OP this is exactly how you were with the other guy.  Why do you get involved with guys that you don't show that you are interested in?

  • Like 1
Brian1223 Member

Brian1223

Posted
Posted (edited)

[ ] Probably would help to take the time to provide all information if you want a helpful and accurate response, instead of a bunch of randoms on a forum taking a stab at the dark with the limited information you have provided. 

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
civility
  • Like 6
Happy Lemming Established Member

Happy Lemming

Posted
Posted
22 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

Well I’m guessing he didn’t care to label it. He kept asking me what are we?

He was attempting to ask you out and although he wasn't doing it properly, you didn't help by being "wishy-washy" in your "I don't know" response.

As a woman, you could have said "I'd say yes to a date if your asked me out" at that point, I'm sure he would have asked you out.

stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted
27 minutes ago, Emma7897 said:

Well I’m guessing he didn’t care to label it. He kept asking me what are we? How was I supposed to know 

So you're saying you don't know if you consider him just a friend or a romantic partner?  Did this guy end the date early too?

While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...