How do you take a better pictures for a dating sites?

[Alvi]

I don't know if this is a right place in a forum to ask but seriously, how do you take good pics to put on a dating site?

Let's face it. I am not very photogenic. I've been told thousands of times that I look a lot better in person rather than in picture. I look shy, tense, nervous for some reason in my pics. If  I smile, it looks forced.  The pictures don't capture my mood. I post outdoors pic, me doing hiking but  they don't look that great either.  I took some professional pics for my work but I look even worse in them. Mostly, I ask my friends or relatives to take a pic of myself.

I am considering going to a professional photographer to perhaps capture a softer side of myself. Would  that help I wonder? But on the other hand, it would not represent the real every day me. Is there a perfect angle that you can look better in your pics for your face and your body? I am not thinking about selfies, I look even worse if a take a selfie. Honestly, can't figure out how some women look so beautiful in their selfies pics. Mostly, I want to get few good pics to improve my dating life. 

 

 

[Happy Lemming]

I don't know about a professional photographer, but it seems the pictures "V" and I take look better when taken outdoors. 

Have you tried taking various pictures of yourself outside??  One of my favorite pictures (of me) was taken in my back yard, next to a tree.  It was a sunny day and the light was just right.  I took one of "V" next to this giant boulder on a trail one day and that one came out perfect, as well.  It was a beautiful sunny day and the light/angle was just right.

Before spending the money on a professional photographer, perhaps have a friend take various pictures of you from different angles on the next sunny day (outside with a nice backdrop).  I'll bet you'll find some nice shots you can use.

 

[vla1120]

If you Google it, you'll find some good tips on taking a better selfie, like extend your head away from your neck, hold the camera to your side, etc. 

[Calmandfocused]

Just a word of caution. 
 

make sure that your pics accurately reflect what you actually look like. 
 

I can’t tell you the amount Of times I’ve been disappointed by guys who look much better in their pics than in person. 
 

Don’t be them. 

[glows]

If you have full length and proper photos of your face I doubt it's you. No need to try too hard. The person you click with will see you as you with your hobbies/interests listed and be inclined to chat with you or meet with you then. And when you meet in person it's about your chemistry.

Do a half smile or gentle smile like you would at something amusing if you don't regularly smile and it feels forced. Whatever feels more comfortable to you, do. I wouldn't worry about what others are doing.

Edited December 8, 2021 by glows

[Happy Lemming]

Are you also trying to meet people in "real life" situations/venues??

[Weezy1973]

14 minutes ago, Calmandfocused said:

make sure that your pics accurately reflect what you actually look like. 

Yes and I’d say you’re better off looking better in person than in your pics than the other way around. 
 

If you need to resort to special techniques for taking selfies then I’d just use the pics you have now instead. Or take more pics.

[Sun Seeker]

If you look better in person then why not stick to meeting people in real life? Much better than OLD anyway.

[smackie9]

You go online to your dating sites, and see what photos of others appeals to you. You have lots to compare ...what works and what doesn't. Take it from there.

[ironpony]

I took photography classes, and women often kept telling me how they liked my dating site pictures.  I would take photos with a 50 to 85mm focal length, because they make a faces look a lot more attractice compared to the focal lengths on cell phone cameras or cameras that have similar focal lengths.  'Selfies' make a person's face distorted and the noses, foreheads or jaws look big and more protruding as a result for example.  They also make people look significantly thinner than they are to the human eye focal length, in person.

So I think this is a big step to making oneself look more attractive in photos.

Edited December 8, 2021 by ironpony

[basil67]

As an add on to @ironponys comment above - if your only camera is your phone, ask someone to take your photo.  Have them step back a few feet and zoom in on you - this will also help remove distortion.

[ironpony]

Yes that's a good point, too I should have mentioned that as an alternative.  Just too use to doing it myself.

Edited December 8, 2021 by ironpony

[basil67]

@ironpony I'm on a few FB sewing groups.  One woman took a selfie in a mirror to get some opinions on her dress.   She was bothered about how fat she looked in the middle....and someone replied "the camera never lies".   To this day, I regret not running that photo through photoshop to remove the distortion of wide angle lens to show the OP that the camera can  indeed lie 

@Alvi the selfie pics which look good are the result of taking 40 photos and choosing the best.  Then cropping and at the very least, a light edit through an app.   When it comes to how to present yourself, there are loads of photography sites which can advise how to position the subject of a photo.  Things like angle, using a prop, what to do with hands.

You say that your smile looks forced.  Does smiling for the camera feel forced?  Or do you feel natural and then look at the photo and wonder what went wrong?

Edited December 8, 2021 by basil67

[Girl Fade Away]

1 hour ago, ironpony said:

'Selfies' make a person's face distorted and the noses, foreheads or jaws look big and more protruding as a result for example

I agree with this. My nose is on the smaller size (although average for my face) but in some selfies it looked quite large. I also have high cheekbones and in some selfies they protruded out like a chipmunk! 

I can take 20 selfies and only find one or maybe two that are "acceptable" and even those aren't that great.   I look much better in photos and more like myself when someone else is taking the picture.  Even better when I don't know they are taking the picture!  It's spontaneous and natural.

So Alvi, try that.  Have someone else take your picture without you knowing. That way you avoid looking tense and nervous which I understand as I used to be quite camera shy but I got over that pretty much as I got older.

Edited December 8, 2021 by Girl Fade Away

[chillii]

 

Just get a friend to take about 100 pics of you stick them on the pc and go through them . Out of all those you should be able to find at least a few that look like the real you and that you like.

lf you don't first try, do it again , just be natural , doing whatever, wouldn't go professional pics. Back when when l was on a date site as a guy, l use to think it was pointless so many of the women having professional pics when they really looked nothing like that in their other pics or real life. Just go natural.

[Lotsgoingon]

Definitely go to a pro photographer. The best really talk to you and find out about you and they take pictures that don't just try to make you look good but more that capture the best of who you are and your interests.

Professional photographers work all the time with people who just don't have natural smiles or who look mean even if they're pleasant and so on ... they exactly know how to make you look your best and still real and honest about who you are. And again, they try to capture your interests as well. 

 

[Girl Fade Away]

28 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said:

Definitely go to a pro photographer

The thing about professional shots is that they often look like a professional took them, and THAT in and of itself could be a turn off to some people.  When I did OLD and a man sent me pro shots, they went straight to trash.   Also, they are often touched up with right lighting and angle and while of course it's going to be a beautiful picture, when they meet in person, the person might look strikingly different!    Is that not what many people complain about?

I reiterate my advice about having a friend take a few pictures spontaneously without you knowing.  You will look less tense, more natural and in an environment you are comfortable in which adds to the energy you portray through the pictures.

 

Edited December 8, 2021 by Girl Fade Away

[Gaeta]

I don't like when men put up professional pictures so I won't suggest you do that. I want to see pictures of men in their environment, in their home, their yard, at their local park etc. showing picture of them sitting on a photographer's couch or taken in the middle of a corn field doesn't talk to me about them. 

The Internet is full of suggestion on how to take better pictures.

[Lotsgoingon]

 

@Girl Fade Away if you got pro photos you wanted to throw away, the problem wasn't that you hired a pro. The problem is that the particular pro you hired was apparently robotic and didn't know what they were doing. They didn't start with rule #1, which is to figure out the context and what they client needs and wants.  And everyone knows the gimmick these days: look good but not too good. 

The kind of photographer the OP wants will literally want to talk to the OP for 15 minutes or more to  understand the OP and the context of online dating, even the site the OP wants to post the photos on. 

And given how fantastic smart phone photos can be these days, the pro photos should just look "good" to a casual viewer. The viewer will be intrigued and feel like they know something about the person--not that the person is gorgeous or that the photos are fake. 

 

 

 

 

[Girl Fade Away]

16 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said:

 

@Girl Fade Away if you got pro photos you wanted to throw away, the problem wasn't that you hired a pro. The problem is that the particular pro you hired was apparently robotic and didn't know what they were doing. They didn't start with rule #1, which is to figure out the context and what they client needs and wants.  And everyone knows the gimmick these days: look good but not too good. 

The kind of photographer the OP wants will literally want to talk to the OP for 15 minutes or more to  understand the OP and the context of online dating, even the site the OP wants to post the photos on. 

And given how fantastic smart phone photos can be these days, the pro photos should just look "good" to a casual viewer. The viewer will be intrigued and feel like they know something about the person--not that the person is gorgeous or that the photos are fake. 

@LotsgoingonI was talking about the pictures I received from men that were professional shots.   Those went into trash because it was clear they were professional shots and I am into more organic natural looking pics from men where I can sense their energy.  But maybe you are right, the pros they hired didn't know what they were doing so the pics looked forced and contrived, that's possible.

I have had some awesome pics taken professionally but when I did OLDing, I always sent natural organic pics taken spontaneously that depicted my energy, one face, one full body (clothed lol) much more my style than sending professional pics.

Edited December 9, 2021 by Girl Fade Away

[Lotsgoingon]

Some people don't have that imagination that you had in taking photos. And again, the real pros make the photos look like they were casually taken. I have never looked at great photos of a woman and thought "too professional." As long as there was a mix of photos, I was fine. 

[chillii]

5 hours ago, Girl Fade Away said:

The thing about professional shots is that they often look like a professional took them, and THAT in and of itself could be a turn off to some people.  When I did OLD and a man sent me pro shots, they went straight to trash.   Also, they are often touched up with right lighting and angle and while of course it's going to be a beautiful picture, when they meet in person, the person might look strikingly different!    Is that not what many people complain about?

I reiterate my advice about having a friend take a few pictures spontaneously without you knowing.  You will look less tense, more natural and in an environment you are comfortable in which adds to the energy you portray through the pictures.

 

Yep , found exactly the same.

Anyway , that's an even better way to go.

[Grey40]

There’s a site called “photofeeler” where you can post photos and women will vote on them based on attractiveness and intelligence and then you get a score. That will help you find out which if your pictures is the best and the top 3-4 is what you should use on the apps. Pro pictures are ok, but you should really only have 1 of them if at all because as others have mentioned, it makes you seem ingenuine..trying to hard, or like a catfish/scammer. People want to see what you actually really look like in a normal setting. 

[chillii]

Haaa , l like that , intelligence yep l'm sure they think of that while they're looking at the pics.

 

[bene]

You could ask a good friend to take time and photograph you in the middle of some activity when you’re not consciously posing for camera. These are the best pictures in my opinion when someone just takes time to observe and capture a moment, a facial expression, an emotion. Shoving a camera to someone hand, freezing and taking one shot doesn’t work  Most people, myself included, make a certain face when posing and it can look forced, not natural. Photo is two dimensional while real life is three dimensional so it’s no wonder that a photo might be different than you in person. 

There are professional photographers as well who would do photoshoots in a  relaxed outdoors setting.

 

Edited December 9, 2021 by bene