jazzlover321 Posted November 20, 2021 Posted November 20, 2021 I met this girl a few weeks ago on a dating app. We were flirting a bit before meeting and she seemed very keen already planning our first three dates and saying she was hoping I was as funny and cute in person as I am over chat. She was telling me she was thinking about me in the shower and imagining our first (potentially hot) kiss! We got talking about travel and she said she was a great travel buddy and we need to accelerate our first three dates and suggested we start with hot tea as she was recovering from a cold. We met for tea and held hands a bit in the cafe and she wanted to see photos of my mum's dogs and said she'd love to meet them and was generally very chatty. I dropped her home and half an hour later she texted me saying she had a great time and it was very nice to meet me live and then started talking about our next date suggesting cinema or iceskating. We tried to plan a movie for the weekend but I had plans Friday she had plans Saturday so just did brunch in the end. She seemed quite nervous but we ended up in a pop up art exhibition in dark room and at one point our eyes met and I pulled her towards me and laid a kiss on her and she kissed me back enthusiastically. And then again when I said goodbye to her. The next evening I suggested we do the movie for Friday (yesterday) and she agreed and we got chatting about Christmas and Christmas movies and she hadn't seen my favourite "White Christmas" and said we could watch it together. I said I'd love that and she said let's do it. Next day she said she coudn't wait until Friday and maybe we could do a home movie night at hers midweek and watch "White Christmas". She said she had some training to finish for work but maybe Wednesday. But then Tuesday she said she still had a lot of training modules to finish and Friday was safer and we could plan a great date for then. Thursday evening she asked what we should do tomorrow. I was a bit bemused because we'd already talked about dinner and a movie. So I said I was still up for a movie but what did she feel like She said maybe a nice dinner or iceskating and then started looking at various iceskating options one was fully booked but then before we could agree anything said she was feeling sleepy and disappeared. Next morning I texted her suggesting I book somewhere for dinner and we can see what we feel like doing after and take it from there. She suggested a restaurant in her area but it was booked so I sorted something else out. But an hour before we were scheduled to meet she texted to say she was feeling tired sleepy from her week and better to do the movie another time. We met for dinner and she seemed a bit off. She kept repeating things she had told me on previous dates and didn't really seem that interested. She was mostly talking about her Christmas plans and travel plans and apparently she is going back to her country for 3 weeks from the 12th december and has a friend visiting next weekend and generally is starting to sound undateable. We finished dinner and she said we should get going and I walked her home and laid a kiss on her at the door. She kissed me back but without much enthusiasm and then after a few kisses said goodnight. I texted her an hour later saying it was lovely to see her and hoped she'd get some good rest. She said thank you same and she loved my choice of restaurant and I replied glad you enjoyed and have heard nothing from her since. I'm not entirely sure what is going on. Maybe she just had a busy week with work and is distracted with all her social plans over the Christmas period and was genuinely tired and not in the mood for romance. But it seems strange that at the start of the week she couldn't wait to see me and wanted me to come over for a midweek movie at hers and by the end of the week she can only be bothered to have dinner with me and ended the evening at 9pm on a Friday night and only seemed to have texted me back after the date out of politeness.
Killian898 Posted November 20, 2021 Posted November 20, 2021 (edited) You’ve seen each other an awful lot in a very short amount of time. In addition to that you have been very keen by texting her a lot and setting up further dates before the ink is dry on the last one. She has not had much time and space to miss you, and there has been no thrill of the chase. Its either this or she has another man or ex on the scene. Either way if you want to rescue this I’d suggest pulling back, not texting her again and letting her come to you. If she does become reinterested then only see each other once a week and don’t do a lot of texting in between. That is your only real option in my view. Edited November 20, 2021 by Killian898
chillii Posted November 20, 2021 Posted November 20, 2021 Sounds like it's only been a day , what part of her having a big week and being so tired don't you understand ? Give her a bit of time.to rest up and get her bearings first of all. As far as is there anything else going on, who knows , but you need to give her a bit of room and stop being such a nag.
Author jazzlover321 Posted November 20, 2021 Author Posted November 20, 2021 She was the one talking three dates in advance before we'd even met and unable to wait until Friday and wanting the midweek home movie date. I was only texting to try to make arrangements for Friday after she cancelled the midweek date because she hadn't managed to finish her work training online course. But I guess it might just be that she was tired from work and wasnt in the mood and best thing to do is leave her and hope that when she is feeling less tired/busy she will get in touch and I can then suggest something. It feels as though she had second thoughts about the movie idea perhaps because she realized it would involve cosying up and perhaps more but she seemed keen on iceskating which is innocent and romantic so maybe when she gets back to me I can suggest that Also the restaurant last night wasn't ideal. I didnt have many options as she left it so late to confirm. But it was a bit crowded and a bit loud, we had mezze and the portions were huge so our table was crowded with food so that created a distance and Anyway I assume better to wait to hear back from her? Or should I maybe hit her up on Sunday. She mentioned she is going to see a landmark with some girlfriends so could maybe ask how that was.
Wiseman2 Posted November 20, 2021 Posted November 20, 2021 10 minutes ago, jazzlover321 said: She was the one talking three dates in advance before we'd even met Anyway I assume better to wait to hear back from her? Maybe too much too soon. Yes scale back. The only red flags are her overzealous planning ahead and a bit of last minute chaos as far as getting together. Keep in mind that you are both still talking to and meeting others.
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