O.L.D - more face pics

[Otter2569]

44 minutes ago, Girl Fade Away said:

There are two different ways of seeing this.  There are women who have no issue posting and sending tons of pics, they thrive off it.  They invite you to view their IG, and other SM.  These women lead by their looks and many are attention seekers.

Their real life appearance may tell a completely different story too.. From the men I know, I wish you luck with these types of women

Then there are women who post one or two pics.  They view on line dating as a quick impersonal introduction and place more value on the actual MEET.  These are  higher quality women from the men I have spoken to about this. 

And when a man asks them for more pics, they might next that man, it goes both ways.  Not because they are hiding something, they might be a knockout.  But because it is shallow and they might feel they have very little in common with such a person. 

Great points and you are right on about the attention seekers.  If this were a single quality pic I would be fine.  The baseball hat and shaded face seemed odd. I will roll with it:  if conversation progresses I may ask or roll the dice and ask for a coffee date.

[Wiseman2]

5 hours ago, Otter2569 said:

You are right on about the pics but it is a way to filter / identify people you may have an interest in (or not).  The only true way is the in person date.

I can see both sides. Why bother having a dating profile if pics are not recent, accurate and varied? 

On the other hand, it's not eBay where you ask for different angles/shots of a product.

Lets put on our tin hats for a moment:  Much older? Married? Drag queen? Butt ugly?

Just nix those with incomplete profiles including obscured photos.

Edited November 20, 2021 by Wiseman2

[Otter2569]

23 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

I can see both sides. Why bother having a dating profile if pics are not recent, accurate and varied? 

On the other hand, it's not eBay where you ask for different angles/shots of a product.

Lets put on our tin hats for a moment:  Much older? Married? Drag queen? Butt ugly?

Just nix those with incomplete profiles including obscured photos.

LOL yeah it's anyones guess!  I will tell you, from what I gather from the photo it was a chilly morning to be outside  

[Otter2569]

21 hours ago, glows said:

I would skip that and ask her out to coffee. It would be less than an hour of your time and you'll verify in person.

It would make for an interesting dating story if nothing else.  Of course if I tell people that she was unattractive looking they are gonna say  "why the hell didn't know you ask for a recent pic"  

[ShyViolet]

I would not even consider meeting up with a person who only has one picture on their profile, where their face cannot be seen clearly.  That's not normal and it's shady... it's like they have something to hide.  The whole point of having an online dating profile is putting yourself out there, having some pictures so people can see what you actually look like.  You shouldn't have to play games and ask for more pictures just so you can see if the person would be your type physically.  I wouldn't even waste my time with this person.

[Trail Blazer]

I was chatting to this girl once on PoF who only had one photo.  She was on a snowboard, with beanie, goggles etc so she couldn't be made out.

I asked her what the deal was with her photo and she said she didn't want people to recognise her.  I told her that it sounded very suss.

She sent me a link to her Facebook account and told me that she was a legit person.  I checked out her Facebook and she seemed legit, but I'm unsure of her intentions.  She wasn't bad looking at all, but we never ended up going on a date. 

I guess if the body is all right, what have you got to lose?  At worst she could be a butter face.  However, that might not even be her reasoning for not posting up more photos.

Ask her out, what have you got to lose?

 

[divegrl]

Just go on a date with her. Most pics are photoshopped or filtered anyways. So even if someone has a ton of pictures, you still won’t really know what they look like until you see them in person. 

 

Take care. 

[chillii]

5 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

I would not even consider meeting up with a person who only has one picture on their profile, where their face cannot be seen clearly.  That's not normal and it's shady... it's like they have something to hide.  The whole point of having an online dating profile is putting yourself out there, having some pictures so people can see what you actually look like.  You shouldn't have to play games and ask for more pictures just so you can see if the person would be your type physically.  I wouldn't even waste my time with this person.

Yeah , same , it's bs.

Back in the day l use to just ask if need be, anyone sensible didn't mind at all it's common sense you'd like to know what you ea look like.

[glows]

12 hours ago, Otter2569 said:

It would make for an interesting dating story if nothing else.  Of course if I tell people that she was unattractive looking they are gonna say  "why the hell didn't know you ask for a recent pic"  

It won't be interesting because it's not unusual or unique. Most meet ups don't result in instant chemistry or attraction. Some of that is a mix of other qualities that are attractive and discovered over time. 

Who are you telling about your dating stories? It's more attractive being discreet.

[Alpacalia]

16 hours ago, Otter2569 said:

It would make for an interesting dating story if nothing else.  Of course if I tell people that she was unattractive looking they are gonna say  "why the hell didn't know you ask for a recent pic"  

I guess in the initial stages dating stories are interesting. Certain milestones with someone you've been dating for a bit and not sharing certain details makes more sense. 

On 11/19/2021 at 1:51 PM, Otter2569 said:

In it she is wearing a hat that shades her face.  It's also a full body shot (which looks good)

If her initial pic she's trying to hide her face maybe she just wants to appear mysterious where you're like "ooh, your body looks good, now I wonder what's underneath the hat."  

Edited November 21, 2021 by Alpaca

[elaine567]

11 hours ago, Trail Blazer said:

she said she didn't want people to recognise her.

I think for some people that is  very valid.

Yes it could be iffy but higher profile or well known people do not want others to know their business.
They do not want to be the butt of jokes or the subject of gossip, about their need to find a date.
 

[Happy Lemming]

I tried on-line dating (briefly) many years ago and even back then the women were using older pictures from when they were younger and thinner.  I also met one woman who admitted her Mom had "photo-shopped" her pics.  This woman looked NOTHING like her pictures.

I agree with @ShyViolet if you are going to put yourself out there, then don't play games with your pics.

I still say you'll be happier if you try to meet women in "real life" situations.

[Gaeta]

1 hour ago, elaine567 said:

I think for some people that is  very valid.

Yes it could be iffy but higher profile or well known people do not want others to know their business.

 

Every dating app gives you the option to send your contacts pictures in private. 

[5kgatorgirl]

This girl sounds like me when I was OL dating. I didn’t have the hat, but only had one face pic and one of me running in a race. I wasn’t sure about online dating and was embarrassed about someone I knew seeing me. But, I wanted to dip my toes in. I did have some guys ask for more pics and I declined. I had many that were also fine with it. A couple of months in, a guy asked if he could call me and we spoke for an hour. Lots of laughs. We set up a date and had an amazing time. He told me I was one of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen and was totally ready to be catfished based on my profile pics.  We have been very, very happily married for 5 years now. We are both grateful he picked up the phone and asked me out. Maybe give her a quick call and see how the conversation goes?

[Alpacalia]

I can see that being a reason.

But I think the general rule is never put anything on the Internet you’re concerned people will judge you for.

If someone is going to judge another person because they're out there dating, well, that's just silly.

Most likely, people are more interested in who will win tonight's basketball game or what Kim Kardashian just did.

[Alvi]

There is nothing wrong asking someone for a photo on a dating site. If someone has good, clear 3-8 photos, then you don't need to ask for anymore since you can see what the person looks like. But if there is no pic or very unclear pic, it is not wrong to ask whatsoever. As long as you are not asking for any inappropriate  photos, it's fine. There is no excuse as to why a person at this day and age cannot produce a photo of themselves. If a person is too sensitive or gives you a whole speech as to why he or she cannot send you a pic, NEXT him or her. Clearly, something fishy is going on there.  Of course, there is no quarantine that the photos are recent. That's just a chance you'll have to take if you decide to meet. But there are no guarantees in life.

[Wiseman2]

56 minutes ago, Alvi said:

There is nothing wrong asking someone for a photo on a dating site.

That's true, however 'do you have more pics?' could easily be misconstrued as an attempt to get nudes or sexting. Too much of that out there.

Therefore if someone's appearance is obscured from an otherwise decent profile the other three options seem more clear. 

1.Meet asap for coffee.

2. Move on 

3. Ask for a video chat.

Edited November 22, 2021 by Wiseman2

[Alvi]

24 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

That's true, however 'do you have more pics?' could easily be misconstrued as an attempt to get nudes or sexting. Too much of that out there.

Absolutely! I usually have good, clear 3-8 pics on a dating site. So any time a when a guy is asking for more pics, I can guarantee he means naked pics. But I was referring to what OP wrote. If a woman (or man) has no photos or very unclear ones, then it is not wrong to ask to see one more clear one. He can even make a joke to diffuse a situation (and to let her know that he is not asking for the nudes) such as to say that he would love to see her lovely face more clearly. 

 

27 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

1.Meet asap for coffee.

2. Move on 

3. Ask for a video chat.

That works. But I would say either meet her or move on. Don't waste too much time with phone calls or video chats. They will not give you a very good idea of what a person is like.

[Girl Fade Away]

45 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said:

That's true, however 'do you have more pics?' could easily be misconstrued as an attempt to get nudes or sexting. Too much of that out there.

Therefore if someone's appearance is obscured from an otherwise decent profile the other three options seem more clear. 

1.Meet asap for coffee.

2. Move on 

3. Ask for a video chat.

Agree with Wiseman2.  Either schedule a meet or just delete.  If someone is uncomfortable posting pics on line and that would include sending to a random stranger, that is their right.  We should all respect that, they have their own reasons. 

Not everyone who does OLD places so much value on pics, many times they are enhanced or even fake. 

If it bothers you, or you think  they are hiding something, NEXT them.  It is THAT simple. 

An in person coffee meet is 15 minutes out of your life.  

Edited November 22, 2021 by Girl Fade Away