Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 I believe that in any relationship honesty should be the order of the day but I don't know if I should be honest about this. When I first met my girlfriend I just looked at her as a conquest. I wanted to brag that I got an older woman into bed and then I was going to dump her when I got bored. Instead of this I fell in love with her and I truly do care about her and I feel like sh-t for even thinking about treating her like a conquest. I can honestly see myself marrying her in the future and this will come up one day. Should I admit this to her and or is it better left unsaid? Women how would you feel if a man admitted this to you?
lindya Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Women how would you feel if a man admitted this to you? I'd feel incredibly hurt and disappointed, and I'd probably shoot through pretty soon after hearing it. The first few months of a new romance can bring out the best in a person, but I really don't believe that love or infatuation alters who you are fundamentally. When someone falls in love with you, or becomes infatuated with you, then for a short while you become perfection personified. That never lasts. To get a good idea of how that person will treat you in the long term, it makes a lot of sense to consider how they perceive and treat the opposite sex in general.
JS17 Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 When I first met my girlfriend I just looked at her as a conquest. I wanted to brag that I got an older woman into bed and then I was going to dump her when I got bored. Do you honestly think she doesn't know this already Woggle?
laRubiaBonita Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 somethings, like this, are better left unsaid. It just proves to you, that you cannot be soo quick to judge.
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Do you honestly think she doesn't know this already Woggle? I don't know. She knows what my views are but I don't know if she knows this.
Art_Critic Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Why be mean or cruel to her and diminish the love you feel for her and she feels for you.. don't tell her.. Why you started to date really has no meaning now.. what matters is how your feel about her now..
JS17 Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 I don't know. She knows what my views are but I don't know if she knows this. All men are only looking for the conquest. Any older woman getting involved with a man that much younger who doesn't know that they're in it for the challenge is pretty thick.
933KJL Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Should I be honest about my original intentions with GF? No--absolutely not!
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 All men are only looking for the conquest. Any older woman getting involved with a man that much younger who doesn't know that they're in it for the challenge is pretty thick. All men do not feel this way. I know I never did until my divorce when I decided that women were only good for one thing until I met her.
JS17 Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 All men do not feel this way. I know I never did until my divorce when I decided that women were only good for one thing until I met her. That's BS. I don't believe it for a second. She knows. The older woman younger man thing is so played out. There's no need to tell her.
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 That's BS. I don't believe it for a second. She knows. The older woman younger man thing is so played out. There's no need to tell her. So you believe that every man just looks at women as a conquest? That is crap. Men are more complex than that. It has gotten to the point in our relationship where we don't even notice the age difference anymore. I have never connected with a woman like this ever.
JS17 Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 So you believe that every man just looks at women as a conquest? That is crap. Men are more complex than that. It has gotten to the point in our relationship where we don't even notice the age difference anymore. I have never connected with a woman like this ever. My views are not the point. The point is you don't need to tell her because she already knows. Younger men only get involved with older women for one reason.
Hot Coco Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 This is funny, am I the only woman who would be FLATTERED to hear this. Speaking for myself I'd be deeply touched. It would be the ultimate compliment for me to know what you're original intentions were and that when you got to me as a person that plan was out of the question for you and that you fell for me. I guess I'm just weird then. I really think it depends on how you put it to her...but my hunch is that she'll see it as the ultimate compliment.
Hot Coco Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Don't most older woman get involved with younger men for just one thing? Wouldn't it be funny if she admitted to you that HER original intentions were the same as yours and that she also fell for you for who you are? I don't think that's so farfetched!
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Don't most older woman get involved with younger men for just one thing? Wouldn't it be funny if she admitted to you that HER original intentions were the same as yours and that she also fell for you for who you are? I don't think that's so farfetched! Might be and I would not be offended. Funny things is that both say we relate to each other so much better than most people our age. Most women outlive their husbands anyway so it would make sense for a woman to marry a younger man. She is the type I can be honest with so she might take it the way you would.
slubberdegullion Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Better to keep your mouth shut. Generally, a man gets in less trouble by remaining silent than by opening one's yap. Besides, your original intentions are in the past. Look to today and tomorrow; living whilst looking in the rear-view mirror is no way to live.
lindya Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 This is funny, am I the only woman who would be FLATTERED to hear this. Speaking for myself I'd be deeply touched. It would be the ultimate compliment for me to know what you're original intentions were and that when you got to me as a person that plan was out of the question for you and that you fell for me. Would you not be more flattered to attract the love of a man who actually liked women? I'm always comparing love/sex to food - make of that what you will - but I see men who use women for sex as junk food addicts. Men who genuinely like women are more akin to gourmets. Tasteful, and appreciative of the finer things in life. If I were going to cook my best dish, I have to say I'd be infinitely more flattered by the compliments of a discerning gourmet than by anything a Big Mac connoisseur might have to say on the matter.
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Better to keep your mouth shut. Generally, a man gets in less trouble by remaining silent than by opening one's yap. Besides, your original intentions are in the past. Look to today and tomorrow; living whilst looking in the rear-view mirror is no way to live. I would not be with a woman if I had to keep my mouth shut to keep the peace. That is a reason why I like this woman so much.
RecordProducer Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Women how would you feel if a man admitted this to you? I would be very disappointed in his personality. Imagine if she told you "I was sent to murder you for money, but I fell in love with you." It would indicate that at one point your intentions were mean and you unscrupulously wanted to use her for sex and brag about it afterwards. You better keep your mouth shut. You are not obligated to tell her EVERYTHING. The truth is you feel bad about it (hopefully!), you had bad experiences, and didn't have the strength to love women after what your ex did to you. Even if she understands this, she will figure out that at one point you were weak and bitter. Women don't like these features in men. You don't like drama queens and we don't like drama kings! She cured your soul from the previous defeat so don't bring the past as a relevant part of the present, when it's not.
JS17 Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Would you not be more flattered to attract the love of a man who actually liked women? Yes but she is as evil a human being as he is so she probably won't care. She laughs at other people's misery as does he. It's a match for sure.
RecordProducer Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Would you not be more flattered to attract the love of a man who actually liked women? I'm always comparing love/sex to food Lyndia, I recognized your style of thinking before I got the chance to see who wrote it. I like your analogies very much, but in this case, this woman's logic is the opposite. If a guy thinks that all women are ugly and only you're beautiful, you would be more flattered, right? If someone loved all women and you were just one of them, you wouldn't be so happy. In any case, I support your theory and share your taste - I prefer to be with a guy who doesn't hate women. I wonder if Woggle's GF hates all men and if yes, I wonder whether he is happy about it.
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Yes but she is as evil a human being as he is so she probably won't care. She laughs at other people's misery as does he. It's a match for sure. How do you know she is evil?
JS17 Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 How do you know she is evil? Because I'm brilliant
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Also she does not hate men. Most of her friends are male. She gets along well with men and that is a good thing.
Author Woggle Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Because I'm brilliant So you can sense her evil even though have never met her and she doesn't even post on this forum?
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