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I am unsure of what I am supposed to do


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Posted

So I met this guy who I'd had a few dates with in the last few weeks.  To review, he'd been married 4x (yes, 4).  First 3 wives divorced, I knew his 4th wife who died of cancer around the first of this year.  We connected through Facebook.  I was feeling unsure about him, I didn't want to be the rebound plus he'd been married 4 times.  I mean, how can you not reference this?

We met at a video game place Dave & Busters.  We had dinner there and played a bunch of shootemup games.  I was ready for him to come by my house - I mean we'd been on a few outings and he could come to my house now.  Not inviting over for sex but just to take it to another level.   Instead he said goodbye in the parking lot and I went home alone.  I had said in conversations before in the past week that I would have him come over.  But no dice.

I drove home, took a shower and put on my pjs.  He texted me if I was still awake I said yes I was watching an adult cartoon on Netflix.  He said to me next "I am unsure what I am supposed to do. Sorry."  I texted back "Watch a cartoon? You just push play ha ha ha... Or are you talking about something else?"  No response.  I think I got the brush off.

Probably for the best.  Moving on.

Posted

He was at a bit of a loss , he was about to talk about something serious to him , most likely about you two and his situation, so probably bad timing for a joke.

Fact he hasn't come over as yet probably points to the same stuff. lf you are interested in him and things going any further , l think he needs a chat.

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Posted

After I posted that he texted again and said he is not sure about this whole dating thing.  I replied saying I am not either, plus his 4th wife died barely a year ago.  He said some days he wants to just stay in bed and cry all day, I said I understood (somewhat).  So I said we should cool this off, he said he enjoyed my company.  I said I liked his as well, but I know inside this is not right and I am going to move on.  

Posted

Yeah right , about what l figured.

lt's very understandable but at the same time why do so many people even go out there in the first place only to turn around later with this stuff .

Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, mortensorchid said:

 ha ha ha... Or are you talking about something else?"  No response.  I think I got the brush off.Probably for the best.  

Agree. Way too many red flags. Next time skip the in house dates or innuendos. 

Don't invite men for netflix and chill if just hooking up isn't what you want.

Screen better. Don't even bother meeting someone with this many red flags 🚩.

Edited by Wiseman2
Posted

He's still grieving his wife and he's not ready to date is what he was saying.  It really isn't you Mortensorchid.

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Posted

This one is just bad timing. He could be a great guy... but is still grieving his wife.   It will take some time.  BUT... I'm guessing he can use a friend. And that friendship could blossom. If you like him otherwise... contact him later today, and simply ask... "How are you doing today?"   No jokes, and nothing too serious.  He would probably appreciate it. 

As far as the being divorced 4 times... well... it could just be bad luck.  He could be a great guy... but he married too quick, and the girls were the issue. (Just looking on the positive side since I don't know the real story)  

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Posted
48 minutes ago, Blind-Sided said:

I'm guessing he can use a friend.

This 

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