Emma B Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 I decided that I'm officially done with dating apps for good! Its just filled with too many time wasters and guys who just want casual sex. I rather just meet men in person, the organic way. While I'm not really a fan of social media. I cant deny that it could be a great way to virtual meet someone. I actually met my last boyfriend that way lol (he slide into my dm's)...anyhoo, I decided to take the plunge and do it my damn self...but I wanted to get a different perspective from the men and women on this forum. Also what should i say? lol...also I'm talking about Instagram P.S this may sound ludicrous but I decided to start sliding into the guys from the New Bachelorette dm's lol. Their successful and cute so why not?...or better yet generally any guy who's successful and cute P.P.S. I don't actually watch the show, as I think it's very fake lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 The tactic typically can work so yes it's a good idea.. I'd open it up to other guys than just the bachelorette guys whose heads will be spinning with their newfound fame and other DM sliders Link to post Share on other sites
dramafreezone Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 (edited) 1 hour ago, Emma B said: P.S this may sound ludicrous but I decided to start sliding into the guys from the New Bachelorette dm's lol. Their successful and cute so why not?...or better yet generally any guy who's successful and cute This is pretty much where I was going to go. Women don't normally slide into regular guy's DMs, it's usually celebs or anyone that has 15 minutes of fame. Any normal guy would love it though. I have this beautiful woman pursuing me and I didn't have to risk anything at all? What's the downside? Oh she only wants me for sex, the horror. This is one topic where most men and women just live in different worlds and both sides would be best served to just accept that truth. Yes most guys want casual sex. Main reason being that we don't have easy access to it. The average woman can get laid far more easily than the average guy. The average guy has to put in a lot of effort and time into getting laid. So yeah we value what we have to work to get. Edited October 21, 2021 by dramafreezone Link to post Share on other sites
Wiseman2 Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 (edited) 3 hours ago, Emma B said: . I rather just meet men in person, the organic way. . I actually met my last boyfriend that way lol (he slide into my dm's)..., Unfortunately, dming randoms on social media is not "in person the organic way". It's simply a different type of online dating, except contacting men who aren't necessarily on there for dating. What happened with the last BF? Since that didn't work out why try that approach again? Are you in school? Are you involved in clubs, groups, sports, fitness, volunteering, taking classes and courses, working full time as well as a side job? Those would be realistic opportunities to meet men "in person, the organic way" Scanning social media and sending random flirty messages to men is no different than online dating apps. Try broadening your horizons and use virtual as well as real life ways to meet men. Edited October 21, 2021 by Wiseman2 5 Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 (edited) What's a dm ? At any rate , if l was single and had a dm and someone slid into it , however they do that to whatever a dm is , the mind boggles haha, but it sounds kinda sexy of you have a dirty mind like me. Anyway , l wouldn't mind at all. Edited October 21, 2021 by chillii Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emma B Posted October 21, 2021 Author Share Posted October 21, 2021 5 hours ago, Versacehottie said: I'd open it up to other guys than just the bachelorette guys whose heads will be spinning with their newfound fame and other DM sliders Lol yeah that's true, But honestly reality fame is different from movie fame. also this girl dm'd one of the old bachelors and now they're together lol. But your right, i'm going to open my dm to other men to 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 4 hours ago, chillii said: What's a dm ? I was wondering the same thing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 (edited) The expression "slide into your DMs" implies that it takes someone who's very smooth and bold to privately message a stranger or acquaintance online. Sounds like something a smooth operator would do, someone on the prowl looking for a hook up. I guess it depends how old you are. If you're in your 20s it might be perceived as cool to do that. Edited October 21, 2021 by Gaeta 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Foxhall Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 Its nothing more startling than a private or "direct message" Im not really into social media at all, the instagram profiles can be interesting though-good showcase- was surprised recently some of the content acquaintances of mine have there, I guess it is quite tempting to get involved. be it for business or for dating or whatever 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 (edited) 6 hours ago, Emma B said: Lol yeah that's true, But honestly reality fame is different from movie fame. also this girl dm'd one of the old bachelors and now they're together lol. But your right, i'm going to open my dm to other men to lol i'm familiar with all the fames (LA-local here). I just wouldn't limit it to people who are newly drunk on their newfound fame having seen the difference when these sorts are out in bars in person as well. The reality guys are soaking up the new attention and tons of new girls throwing themselves at them. In theory that's only 25 guys from the latest season let's say or you're right go back into older seasons where there were just as cute or cuter guys and the attention has settled in a bit or faded. Anyway in a way you should treat your sliding into DMs plan like a dating app in terms of volume a bit more and up the numbers--as long as the guys aren't connected to each other which is pretty easy to see. Or you could go narrowly targeted and really really really go after one or two of the ones that you think you'd like the best. The benefit being, with IG you can get a good idea about what a person's personality might be like vs a flat 2D dating app profile. Good luck. lol let us know how it goes Edited October 21, 2021 by Versacehottie Link to post Share on other sites
ResentCourtship2099 Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 I would hope she is being serious about expressing interest first, and not just trying to tease or lead me on, just use me for validation, if she is serious, it's an awesome change of things for a woman to go after a guy for once Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emma B Posted October 21, 2021 Author Share Posted October 21, 2021 13 hours ago, Wiseman2 said: Unfortunately, dming randoms on social media is not "in person the organic way". It's simply a different type of online dating, except contacting men who aren't necessarily on there for dating. What happened with the last BF? Since that didn't work out why try that approach again? Are you in school? Are you involved in clubs, groups, sports, fitness, volunteering, taking classes and courses, working full time as well as a side job? Those would be realistic opportunities to meet men "in person, the organic way" Scanning social media and sending random flirty messages to men is no different than online dating apps. Try broadening your horizons and use virtual as well as real life ways to meet men. Well i never said that's the ONLY way I wanted to meet guys, just that, that's one of the ways. My last BF didn't work out because he ended up being racist...before that we were very happy but I can't in good conscious date someone who's ignorant enough to believe racism doesn't exist...especially since I'm a black women who deals with racism 24/7...so yeah. other then that I think it's a brilliant idea to dm some people, who knows if anything I can make more guy friends that way. I go to school but it's a community college so no one is cute to me tbh (except for the theater kids), I will be transferring to Rutgers University soon and they are ALOT of cute guys there lol. But i can kind of be shy if i find a guy really cute, even though im outgoing. And lastly I don work but it's mostly freelance stuff since I am an actress, I meet some cute guys sometimes lol. But it's in New York and some of the guys there don't take dating seriously. Anyways I'm just trying to be more open as ever since it's about to be cold soon where I live lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emma B Posted October 21, 2021 Author Share Posted October 21, 2021 12 hours ago, chillii said: What's a dm ? At any rate , if l was single and had a dm and someone slid into it , however they do that to whatever a dm is , the mind boggles haha, but it sounds kinda sexy of you have a dirty mind like me. Anyway , l wouldn't mind at all. Dm is direct message Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emma B Posted October 21, 2021 Author Share Posted October 21, 2021 5 hours ago, Versacehottie said: lol i'm familiar with all the fames (LA-local here). I just wouldn't limit it to people who are newly drunk on their newfound fame having seen the difference when these sorts are out in bars in person as well. The reality guys are soaking up the new attention and tons of new girls throwing themselves at them. In theory that's only 25 guys from the latest season let's say or you're right go back into older seasons where there were just as cute or cuter guys and the attention has settled in a bit or faded. Anyway in a way you should treat your sliding into DMs plan like a dating app in terms of volume a bit more and up the numbers--as long as the guys aren't connected to each other which is pretty easy to see. Or you could go narrowly targeted and really really really go after one or two of the ones that you think you'd like the best. The benefit being, with IG you can get a good idea about what a person's personality might be like vs a flat 2D dating app profile. Good luck. lol let us know how it goes Yeah that's a good idea! I think I'm just going to look at things I'm interested in...like fitness for example and if there's a guy that's into that as well and i like his profile then I will def slide into his dm's lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dramafreezone Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 8 hours ago, Gaeta said: The expression "slide into your DMs" implies that it takes someone who's very smooth and bold to privately message a stranger or acquaintance online. Sounds like something a smooth operator would do, someone on the prowl looking for a hook up. I guess it depends how old you are. If you're in your 20s it might be perceived as cool to do that. I don't know how smooth an operator one has to be to slide into a DM. The whole OLD construct is non-confrontational, low risk to one's ego. Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 1 hour ago, Emma B said: Yeah that's a good idea! I think I'm just going to look at things I'm interested in...like fitness for example and if there's a guy that's into that as well and i like his profile then I will def slide into his dm's lol. Absolutely like-minded interests is a great way to go. I definitely know people who have dated bc of meeting over IG or meeting once in person and then adding on IG and then it snowballs in a good way that it wouldn't normally have done. A lot of guys are enthralled with the actress occupation (whether or not you have big credits yet). You can definitely "market" yourself in a way too because you are pretty and I assume fit, that is even better than a dating profile (less shameless in a way). Because the theory is you're promoting yourself as a brand and your occupation and the like on IG--but of course it can be somewhat calculated and enticing. Guys are definitely into it--so some would probably slide into your DMs! Staying open is just key in general Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted October 21, 2021 Share Posted October 21, 2021 I agree that if you're comfortable doing it, find someone who shares your interests and strike up a chat. Just because it's simple to send a private message doesn't mean your message will be productive or risk-free. You should also bear in mind that these aren't people who are especially on dating websites, so you don't know if they are single, in a relationship, married, etc. But I'm guessing that will be one of your screening factors. Link to post Share on other sites
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