Ember09 Posted October 10, 2021 Posted October 10, 2021 Evening all, a bit of a back story ive been single now for 3 years after a long term 8 year relationship. I've dated casually on and off for a bit but never clicked with anyone. I recently met this man through my work and we have been chatting quite consistently for 3 weeks before our first date yesterday. Hes a quick replier, very engaging in conversation etc. We went out for coffee yesterday, the date lasted about 3 hours, i feel like we got on great. Before i had even gotten home he had messaged me saying he had a great night, can't wait to see me again and seemed normal. Fast forward to today hes barely spoke a word, reading my messages and leaving them unanswered for hours and doesn't seemed bothered to have a conversation. Which is fine, im no stranger to things fizzling out but its such a contrast from yesterday? I guess what im asking for is some advice. Am i being too paranoid? Would this seem like a red flag to you?
Happy Lemming Posted October 10, 2021 Posted October 10, 2021 Is he a college football fan?? He could be watching any number of games on today.
FMW Posted October 10, 2021 Posted October 10, 2021 Not a red flag yet. Maybe he's just preoccupied with work or friends/family. His normal texting pattern may not be the immediate responses you received at the start. Give it a little time before making any judgments. In the meantime focus on other things and try not to dwell on it.
Wiseman2 Posted October 10, 2021 Posted October 10, 2021 10 hours ago, Ember09 said: , reading my messages and leaving them unanswered for hours and doesn't seemed bothered to have a conversation. He wants to date not make a textbuddy. Scale way back on the texting. He mentioned he had a good time and wants to see you again. The only red flag is your attempts at text-tethering someone after one coffee meet. Relax he's into you.
Alpacalia Posted October 10, 2021 Posted October 10, 2021 Try not to approach it anticipating a high level of constant communication. When you put too much stock in this outcome, you are overly invested in the future. 1
ShyViolet Posted October 12, 2021 Posted October 12, 2021 This is a person who you have gone on ONE date with. You are wayyy over-analyzing things. You're setting yourself up for anguish if you are going to put prospective dating partners' texting/phone habits under this big of a microscope. People aren't always glued to their phones. Maybe he's busy today.
spiderowl Posted October 13, 2021 Posted October 13, 2021 It is possible he is unusually busy today but he could at least acknowledge your message, that would be polite. I think it is strange he is not responding too. It all depends what you need really - if you are a person who likes communication and who wants to hear from him once a day or something, then ignoring your messages for hours will never suit you. While others say relax and don't expect him to want to text much, I agree to a certain extent but also consider whether you want a guy who is only going to communicate in person. Think about what level of communication would suit you best - you are the one who is dating the guy and who knows how it makes you feel. 1
Recommended Posts