brittanyjean259 Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 I have two questions in regards to 1) contacting the ex through a text on thanksgiving just to wish him a happy thanks giving 2)is it true if you let your self feel the pain of the relationship you will heal quicker...??? i havent talked to the ex in almost 3 months...would i ruin my NC if i just do that one thing...i want him to know that i still exist and that i didnt fall off the face of the earth....? what do you think
Art_Critic Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 It's not even Halloween yet.. Thanksgiving is more than a month off.. Why worry about it now ?? To answer your question.. Do not send him a text, letter , card, smoke signal or send one to his family.. You will just expect a reply and be hurt when it doesn't happen.. Try and move on and find someone else.
scobro Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 Why bother do you really want him to have a good thanksgiving?(i want my ex to get salmonella, personally)I think it's just a way for you to cling to some hope that if he contacts you there is hope to get back together.I honestly think it would be a mistake.
Author brittanyjean259 Posted October 19, 2005 Author Posted October 19, 2005 yeah your exactly right, it would just be clinging on to hope, ...was just sitting in class thinking about it...than was like wait what am i doing? i have different moods ... i wish i could get some one new, but it just wouldent be healthy.. but its okay thank you
Art_Critic Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 i wish i could get some one new, but it just wouldent be healthy.. Killer Attitude Brittany .. You will heal just fine.. Everybody heals at their own pace and with the attitude you have you will be a lot stronger when you come out of the fog.. goodluck
Author brittanyjean259 Posted October 19, 2005 Author Posted October 19, 2005 thank you ! if you let your self feel the pain, rather than ingore it.. do you heal quicker? sometimes when i hurt, i like it because i feel the more i hurt the quicker i can get over this.... does that make sence?!
Art_Critic Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 thank you ! if you let your self feel the pain, rather than ingore it.. do you heal quicker? sometimes when i hurt, i like it because i feel the more i hurt the quicker i can get over this.... does that make sence?! I have always believed that by feeling the pain you heal better and come out stronger.. I don't think faster though You are also more prepared for the next relationship
Author brittanyjean259 Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 Its kinda scary knowing that, the healing process its just a sad depressing feeling....its like i cant beleive this is really happening but if your with the wrong person and you are in love with them...what r u goin to do any way stay with them? so eventually this was going to happen and i guess better now than later... its still shocking you know what i meen? and since this is the first time ever of loving some one, it is the first time of ever loosing some one.. i just dont know howd id ever deal with a death of someone... that healing process would just be never ending and more unberable.. so i guess im thank full first cut is the deepest? was yours
Art_Critic Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 i just dont know howd id ever deal with a death of someone... first cut is the deepest? was yours Yeah the first cut is the deepest.. You learn from this and grow.. And in death sometimes it is easier because death is so final.. There is no chance to contact them and try to get them back. That is why moving on is really in your mind.. Try and believe your bf is dead to you.. that's more final.
meltwithme Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 Wow small world I was thinking the same thing today, also decided it would do me no good. Hope is the last thing to go, what helped me was realizing the ex just doesn't give a **** about you anymore. It hit me today and it stings baaaad. It will hit you like a sack of bricks at first, but then you can start to be indifferent to them as well. If they ever find the feelings they had it will be on their own. There’s nothing we can do to change the past or bring back those feelings that were once mutual. So the only thing to hope for now should be a bright future the rest of life, one chapter closed, now you must start a new one of your own. No sequel can be marked that doesn’t have ink - if your ex wants to bring back that ink (s)he will let you know.
Author brittanyjean259 Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 if my ex ever does come back, and i still love him... why cant i just tell my self( if this ever happens) NO, after all hes done to me, and after we break up he rebounds...thats if he does... is he worth taking back....or move on?i get so blind when he comes back and trys to manipulate me... i guess it hurts to think the truth:-x
JohnJohn Posted October 20, 2005 Posted October 20, 2005 NO, after all hes done to me, and after we break up he rebounds...thats if he does... is he worth taking back....or move on?i get so blind when he comes back and trys to manipulate me... This is a great thread. Take the advice of the previous posters. They are absolutely dead on correct. You get blind because love is blind as is so commonly said. Manipluating is a form of emotional abuse. No one deserves that. Try this: Did you ever wonder in the past what true love would be like? Did you imagine a "knight in shining armor"? If so how did you imagine how he would treat you? Like a Queen most likely? No one has visions of the perfect love where someone manipulates and controls them. You envision being treated well and you deserve nothing less.
Author brittanyjean259 Posted October 20, 2005 Author Posted October 20, 2005 it sure did feel like love, but in a hateful sometimes spiteful way....more so on his side... true love i guess happens when your older...it can happen when your young...but more so puppy love? i had the same feeling for him when he first came back to school.... ( b4 knowing him)...and i guess my love was based on infautaion....but it was still a feeling for 3 years... and is hard to let it go... i will defently look at it like that...because when i think of true love i just think of seeing other cuples....if he ever broke my stuff and got very tempermental...than i guess he isnt the right one for me... but i havent talked to him in almost 3 months, he def wont talk to me...so THATS GOOD thanksss
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