Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Cute. Hey, I told you if beating up on me makes you feel better, go ahead. Nothing else worked! Beating up on you? Sounds like you're playing the victim.....
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Yeah but I came to this place because I'm not doing too well. Only now I can no longer post here---except just as entertainment. It was really the only place I had to go to but it was a mistake. There's more going on but I have nowhere to go now. I really hesitate to post even that because some poster will come back with some nasty reply to that too. I hope people don't do this to anyone else who is in my shoes. That wasn't nice Sami. Lis doesn't want to be someone's entertainment...as for me, I don't care. I like putting a smile on someone's face:laugh:
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Why don't you get it off your chest and just ignore those of us who annoy you? What's so hard about that? Because you were destroying what little self-worth I had. THAT'S why. Apparently you just want me to post more just so you can start up again. I'm smarter than that. I don't walk into fire after getting burned.
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 That wasn't nice Sami. Lis doesn't want to be someone's entertainment...as for me, I don't care. I like putting a smile on someone's face:laugh: Then what's your purpose HERE?
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Because you were destroying what little self-worth I had. THAT'S why. Apparently you just want me to post more just so you can start up again. I'm smarter than that. I don't walk into fire after getting burned. Now, REALLY!!! I was destroying what little self-worth you had? First of all, why would you give anyone that much power? Secondly, that's really out there! NO ONE can take you're self-worth away from you. Well, if you let them yes. And I never even THOUGHT about doing that to you...nor have I done that. But like I said. Keep beating up on me if it makes you feel better.
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Then what's your purpose HERE? I guess to put a smile on Sami's face! Duh!
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Then what's your purpose HERE? Also to take your beatings for everyone here. I can take it. Go ahead. Remember, the more you beat up on me, the better you'll feel!
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Now, REALLY!!! I was destroying what little self-worth you had? First of all, why would you give anyone that much power? Secondly, that's really out there! NO ONE can take you're self-worth away from you. Well, if you let them yes. And I never even THOUGHT about doing that to you...nor have I done that. Apparently you've never been in my shoes (emotionally). Maybe that explains why you can't relate. But like I said. Keep beating up on me if it makes you feel better. No thanks. I'm a little bored with that.
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Beating up on you? Sounds like you're playing the victim..... Oh, I just saw this. Playing the victim? Yeah, I guess you're right. I wanted to see what it felt like. Haven't been one in so long. I forgot what it feels like but judging from all the "victims" on here lately, I figure it must feel pretty good or else why would anyone play one.
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Also to take your beatings for everyone here. I can take it. Go ahead. Remember, the more you beat up on me, the better you'll feel! And by golly, we all know you're just here to help.
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Apparently you've never been in my shoes (emotionally). Maybe that explains why you can't relate. No thanks. I'm a little bored with that. I told you I've been as low as you have if not lower emotionally. I really didn't have a problem with people telling me what they thought..even if I didn't really want to hear it. Glad you got bored of beating me up...I'll go lick my wounds now.
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Oh, I just saw this. Playing the victim? Yeah, I guess you're right. I wanted to see what it felt like. Haven't been one in so long. I forgot what it feels like but judging from all the "victims" on here lately, I figure it must feel pretty good or else why would anyone play one. You seem to come here just to get attention I see. Didn't you say you were leaving pages ago?
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 And by golly, we all know you're just here to help. Well, good for you! You're finally catching on! Have a good evening!
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 I told you I've been as low as you have if not lower emotionally. I really didn't have a problem with people telling me what they thought..even if I didn't really want to hear it. Then DUH! You weren't where I am then. Nevermind. It's beyond your comprehension.
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 You seem to come here just to get attention I see. Didn't you say you were leaving pages ago? Yup, I left and came back. Yeah, I love attention. Doesn't everyone?
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Then DUH! You weren't where I am then. Nevermind. It's beyond your comprehension. Nope I wasn't where you are but I was as low...and don't start with that it's beyond your comprehension crap. You don't hold the patent on pain. Other people have felt worse pain and I've been in the depths of despair. So...no. It's not beyond my comprehension at all.
whichwayisup Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Because you were destroying what little self-worth I had. THAT'S why. Apparently you just want me to post more just so you can start up again. I'm smarter than that. I don't walk into fire after getting burned. Lis, don't ever allow anybody to make you feel bad. You don't know any of us, just as we don't know you. We help, we advise, we joke around. Some of us are lucky to bond and get to know eachother through PM's and share things. But really, we don't know eachother. So, please don't give anybody the power of making you feel bad. It's like a mom situation! My mom at times can make me feel like s***, can put me down, yet pick me up in the same sentence. I allowed her to do that to me for years, and I can only blame myself. I let her take control over MY emotions. Does that make sense? Now, what she thinks/does most of the time has no affect on me. I won't allow her to make me feel bad....I took back the power. So, do you see what I'm getting at? WWIU
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Lis, don't ever allow anybody to make you feel bad. You don't know any of us, just as we don't know you. We help, we advise, we joke around. Some of us are lucky to bond and get to know eachother through PM's and share things. But really, we don't know eachother. So, please don't give anybody the power of making you feel bad. That's a nice ideal but it's hard for me to apply it. People can make me feel THAT bad. That's why posters here should realize that not everyone is like them and some people are affected by things a lot more deeply than others. If posters say some of the things they've said to me to others out there who are like me, I'm really afraid they could lead someone to ending their life. Posters who say those things might think that if it was said to them, they might feel insulted but it wouldn't be a big deal. They don't realize that to someone else, it could mean the difference between wanting to go on or not. People can say they've been low and they know what that feels like. But they only know what that feels like for THEM. They don't know what it feels like for some people. People can feel low and worthless but still feel like they have some worth as a person. They can't relate to someone who doesn't think like them. That feeling of INNER worth is created over a lifetime. Some people have experiences in life (combined with high sensitivity) that don't allow them to ever acquire that. Now I don't want to hear replies of people saying how they've dealt with all kinds of bad things in their life. That's NOT what I'm saying here. A person can have a lot of bad experiences in their life, BUT if they acquire a feeling of worth at a young age, they can withstand that. Not everyone GETS a feeling of worth handed to them. Some posters here are only thinking about how it is FOR THEM and there's nothing wrong with that. What's wrong is them assuming that EVERYONE reacts to things like they do.
whichwayisup Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Good post Lis. I undertand and I hope others now do too. I hope now everybody will just contribute in a positive way.
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 Good post Lis. I undertand and I hope others now do too. I hope now everybody will just contribute in a positive way. But the thread is pointless now because I don't feel comfortable talking about any of it anymore here. I'm left with nowhere to go now. Never thought I'd go to a forum for support --especially having nowhere else to turn to----and end up with posters telling me to end my life, how unlikeable and unloveable I am, etc.... I suppose the benefit was to those posters by making them feel powerful for a day.
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Lis, you should count up all the posts or posters that you liked or thought helped you in some way. Don't you think that percentage would be WAY higher than the ones who said things you didn't like? It's the same in real life as someone pointed out. You'll get people who give you what you need and others who won't and yet others who make you feel worse (yes, because you let them. If some people helped then you should still post. If NO ONE helped then I can see not posting.
Hot Coco Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 Ok, I know you said you're not posting about this anymore but you're not still speaking to that creep are you?
t and v Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 and have been following along for quite a while. i have so many thoughts, feelings, awakenings, drownings, floating, i wanted to speak up so many times. now i think i have to say to this what tom petty said............... you don't know how it feels, yeah, you don't know how it feels, to be me.
newbby Posted October 31, 2005 Posted October 31, 2005 hi liswil, i have read through most of this thread but i skimmed the last bit because its really long. i think that sami d has made some very good points. i understand the frustration of posters as i have had to check myself a few times too. advice given is not usually for altruistic reasons as much as we like to think, as i think lindya pointed out. or it begins altruistically but mostly people want to get something back from their advice and if they dont they get angry. at this point they need to step back and take a look at themselves and why they are actually angry. it is their own problem if they get angry. sami also said that advice is pointless if it is not recognised by the person seeking it. it is very true. if the advice giver and the advicee are on different pages then it is pointless. when you are in the pit of personal hell that you are in it does seem as though you are alone in your suffering and it doesnt matter how many people say they have gone through this, because it does not help you. for one thing pain is subjective, and everyones pain is the worst pain for them, it is an impossible thing to compare. you simply cant. i know how you feel on that one, you are not arguing that your own pain is worse in order to be a victim, you are trying to explain in the hope that somebody will understand. so, how about if nobody ever actually understands? what then? i am saying this because it is a point i reached, i am not sure if it is helpful or not, but i do know that resisting the way things are multiplies our own pain, and i know this only in retrospect. you want people to understand and you want to be loved and accepted, you dont want to be alone or lonely or unloved or ignored. the trouble is that then because that is the way it is right now, you resist it and you fight against it. how about if you accept that it is the way it is AT THE MOMENT. just simply accept it. if you are not comparing the way things are, with the way you want things to be, or the way that things are for other people, then all you are actually left with, is the way things are. once you have accepted the way things are, it is easier to let go of the feelings. it takes alot of practise and is not easy to do. meditation also is very good and helpful with this. i completely agree with you about crisis lines etc. in my opinion when i have been at my lowest, they are useless, and sometimes harmful, as is psychology in any form. when i was at a point of being very suicidal all of the time, i rung all of those lines constantly and they made me feel worse. i went to the doctors and was put on medication which also made me feel worse. people can say all they like that those things are helpful and that you can help yourself with those things, but having been there and finding they were not, i completely agree with you. sometimes there simply is no help out there and it seems very bleak and pointless.
Author liswil Posted October 31, 2005 Author Posted October 31, 2005 you want people to understand and you want to be loved and accepted, you dont want to be alone or lonely or unloved or ignored. the trouble is that then because that is the way it is right now, you resist it and you fight against it. how about if you accept that it is the way it is AT THE MOMENT. just simply accept it. if you are not comparing the way things are, with the way you want things to be, or the way that things are for other people, then all you are actually left with, is the way things are. once you have accepted the way things are, it is easier to let go of the feelings. I should accept that I'm lonely, unloved, ignored, alone, etc...?
Recommended Posts