mila Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 things between he and i have been rocky the past two weeks. i don't think it's working out. i'm terribly disappointed with the way he's behaving. he should've been more understanding about the things im going thru at the moment. but instead, he's pushing me away. i already apologized for what i did (which isn't a dealbreaker in my vocabulary -- just lack of communication skills and patience). he accepted it but still keeps harboring the resentment. and i won't apologize again. im tired of it. i don't get it. one minute, we were extremely happy. he even said he wouldn't know what to do if he never met me. then literally a couple of days later, we were fighting. and we're still fighting. he's been out of town this whole time, on a biz trip, when we started fighting. it's been tough because he's not here. it would've probably been a lot easier if he were in town. i just feel like he's not making an effort to make this work. i feel like he's not willing to compromise, nor willing to accept me for who i am. who i really am. and not the fantasy that he's created in his head. im not perfect. i feel like he's a totally different person after this big fight. he's not what i expected him to be. he would call me just to say hi. but he's still standoffish. and he got defensive when i joked about something that insinuate he could be fooling around. it was just a joke for me and we would always make jokes like that. but yesterday, he got defensive about it... like, if he has nothing to hide, why get paranoid? know what i mean? and whenever i tried to talk about us, our issues, he would always say he doesn't have time right now. that he's been stressed out at work and that he'll deal with it when he gets back (which would be tomorrow). my worst fear is that he might be going behind my back. that he could be talking/seeing another girl while he was up there. i don't know. i don't have a proof. but i just feel that something's not right. my instincts never fail me.. it sucks because for years, i've managed to be by myself. i've never let anyone get close to me. because i have been burned before. i have been cheated on before. twice actually... and when i met him, i chose to break down that wall. i trusted him. i let myself be completely vulnerable... now, i feel like i made a mistake. why am i such a fool for letting him get close to me? i really feel stupid right now.. why is this happening again??? i'm more mad than sad.
Lishy Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 all of the cheating signs are there hon - If you ask he he will deny it unless he wants to leave you. Or maybe the distance between you has made him more stand offish
Author mila Posted October 19, 2005 Author Posted October 19, 2005 all of the cheating signs are there hon - If you ask he he will deny it unless he wants to leave you. Or maybe the distance between you has made him more stand offish thanks for responding to my long post. i don't know if he is cheating on me or not, but i do know something is not right. and i know he will deny it if i do ask. so i have to gather my evidence first so i can back up my accusations. i guess im just taking it too hard on myself because i feel like it's not fair. i did what i could. i gave 100%. i have been honest with him from day 1. and this is what i get. i don't undestand it.
Lishy Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 Baby you did NOTHING wrong - You did the right thing opening up and being trusting with him. If we do not open up we will close ourselves off from love and sometimes we have to take risks. Good on your for allowing that to happen after being cheated on previousely. If this guy is doing the same thing HE is the loser!!!!!!! Ok now you have to find out what the heck is going on babe. Gather your evidence before you confront him - If he is cheating and he knows you are suspicious he will hide things better. I suggest you back off from him and give him back some of the treatment he is giving you - Actions speak louder than words - SHOW him how it feels rather than tell him! If he IS cheating then best you find out what kind of guy he is now than when you get further down the road and maybe have kids or a morgage!! Good luck darling x
Lishy Posted October 19, 2005 Posted October 19, 2005 Ps ...... never ignore your womens intuition we are rarely wrong when we smell a rat!!!!!
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