Fox Sake Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 6 hours ago, Black Cement said: She finally replied, she said yes and seemed pretty excited. Just gotta find the right kind of date and be on my game… This is awesome news!!! Really happy you got your opportunity. It’s quite unusual, which I’m gonna take as a good sign on your behalf. You should know her reasonably well by now if you talk every day , so what’s your game plan for a date? 3
d0nnivain Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 10 hours ago, Black Cement said: She finally replied, she said yes and seemed pretty excited. Just gotta find the right kind of date and be on my game… Glad she said yes. What do you mean "the right kind of date"? Just spend time with her. You don't need to "be on your game." Be yourself but gracious, kind & attentive. Listen to her. Make eye contact. There is no need for some macho crap PUA BS. 3 1
smackie9 Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 10 hours ago, Black Cement said: She finally replied, she said yes and seemed pretty excited. Just gotta find the right kind of date and be on my game… The odds were against you but hey, sounds like you beat them. I hope everything works out for you Remember to just be yourself, and relax, enjoy! 1
smackie9 Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 37 minutes ago, d0nnivain said: Glad she said yes. What do you mean "the right kind of date"? Just spend time with her. You don't need to "be on your game." Be yourself but gracious, kind & attentive. Listen to her. Make eye contact. There is no need for some macho crap PUA BS. This 100%^^^ 1
Fox Sake Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 I got the impression by his “game” he was referring to just being himself and not being too nervous or awkward on the date and making her feel at ease.. I could be wrong tho. Given he did play a game of sorts for the last while, it’s not out of the question I guess! Definitely don’t play games! Also, please go and buy yourself a lottery ticket @Black Cement 2 2
mark clemson Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 1 hour ago, d0nnivain said: You don't need to "be on your game." Be yourself but gracious, kind & attentive. Listen to her. Make eye contact. There is no need for some macho crap PUA BS. All true and good IMO. But it's also true that you DON'T want to come across as overly nervous, insecure, awkward, or needy. So if "not being on your game" would mean coming across as any of those, then yeah. Let's not forget you took a month to actually ask her out. Speaking generally, women tend to respond well to confidence and strong social skills. 2 1
princessaurora Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 Yay! Glad it worked out. Now be yourself but do make it clear you're interested.. 1
Author Black Cement Posted August 23, 2021 Author Posted August 23, 2021 Well she didn’t want to go to the typical movie and dinner, so we decided to go on a hike. Maybe I’ll plan a picnic or something. When I mean on my game, I don’t want to be nervous and awkward. Just be more confident and try to have fun. 3
d0nnivain Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 That's great then. A hike & a picnic sound lovely. Outdoors is better with the virus too. Have fun. You got this. 1 1
glows Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 1 hour ago, Black Cement said: Well she didn’t want to go to the typical movie and dinner, so we decided to go on a hike. Maybe I’ll plan a picnic or something. When I mean on my game, I don’t want to be nervous and awkward. Just be more confident and try to have fun. That sounds fun already. 1
Miss Spider Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 (edited) Plz at least try to kiss her on picnic..how you gonna have James dean as ur avatar and wait over a month Edited August 23, 2021 by Cookiesandough 1 2
Author Black Cement Posted August 24, 2021 Author Posted August 24, 2021 5 hours ago, Cookiesandough said: Plz at least try to kiss her on picnic..how you gonna have James dean as ur avatar and wait over a month Lol, I’ll see what happens, don’t wanna force anything 1 1
d0nnivain Posted August 24, 2021 Posted August 24, 2021 10 hours ago, Black Cement said: don’t wanna force anything There's a difference between forcing & being confident enough to press your advantage. You can manipulate the situation into something where a kiss is plausible. Her body language will tell you if she is open. I think what @Cookiesandoughis saying is don't chicken out if the opportunity presents itself & do be on the lookout for it. 1
Author Black Cement Posted August 24, 2021 Author Posted August 24, 2021 2 hours ago, d0nnivain said: There's a difference between forcing & being confident enough to press your advantage. You can manipulate the situation into something where a kiss is plausible. Her body language will tell you if she is open. I think what @Cookiesandoughis saying is don't chicken out if the opportunity presents itself & do be on the lookout for it. Yeah, I have a problem with making the first move, it’s always been the girl. I’m always thinking I should be a gentleman and not take advantage of women. I just gotta remember we met on a dating site, and she wants to go out with me. 4
princessaurora Posted August 24, 2021 Posted August 24, 2021 I say this alot, but a cheek kiss is a great way to test the waters and let things flow naturally from there. 1 1
d0nnivain Posted August 24, 2021 Posted August 24, 2021 1 hour ago, Black Cement said: I’m always thinking I should be a gentleman and not take advantage of women. You are right that no one should take advantage of someone else. However on a date, if she's signaling that she wants to be kissed, you are not taking advantage of someone. You are giving her what she wants. 2 1
Author Black Cement Posted August 28, 2021 Author Posted August 28, 2021 So I just came back from the second date. It didn’t go as expected, but it wasn’t bad. First thing it was over 100 degrees and we went hiking with her dog, so not too romantic. She said how she’s an introvert and rather be at home but I got her to come out with me at least. We hiked for a few hours and I asked her to lunch, she said she had plans to meet with her friends and made time to spend the morning with me. As we said our goodbyes she said she would hug me, but she was all sweaty/sticky. So kissing her was out of the question. At this point , I feel we’re good friends who make each other laugh, but still unsatisfied. At least she agreed to go to a museum next time, & even a weekend getaway to Hawaii! So that’s where I’m at. 1
petee Posted August 28, 2021 Posted August 28, 2021 OK this is sounding good. A morning thing is good, and should take away some of your doubts? A museum would not be a good setting, perhaps get her bowling or doing something fun... leading into lunch? It does sound like she is introvert, and a bit like you with the whole kissing thing! You will find a natural moment, I'm sure, but if not try at the end of the 'date'. If she backs off then you have another friend! No problem with that, but you seem to be applying your own pressure!
Author Black Cement Posted August 28, 2021 Author Posted August 28, 2021 1 hour ago, petee said: OK this is sounding good. A morning thing is good, and should take away some of your doubts? A museum would not be a good setting, perhaps get her bowling or doing something fun... leading into lunch? It does sound like she is introvert, and a bit like you with the whole kissing thing! You will find a natural moment, I'm sure, but if not try at the end of the 'date'. If she backs off then you have another friend! No problem with that, but you seem to be applying your own pressure! I still feel doubtful, was planning on spending the whole day with her and kinda disappointed. Idk if I should ask her what her intentions are and if she wants to take it to the next level
petee Posted August 28, 2021 Posted August 28, 2021 We are as impatient as each other! You are just pals at the moment so roll with it. Once you cross the line then you will naturally start spending more time together. Do not ask her for her intentions, that's too forward for this stage and could get her thinking! What is the next level? I'd say a kiss, but she might take it somewhat differently. Play it cool, time is your friend here. Rush once, try twice. Don't rush!! 1 1
Author Black Cement Posted August 29, 2021 Author Posted August 29, 2021 4 hours ago, petee said: We are as impatient as each other! You are just pals at the moment so roll with it. Once you cross the line then you will naturally start spending more time together. Do not ask her for her intentions, that's too forward for this stage and could get her thinking! What is the next level? I'd say a kiss, but she might take it somewhat differently. Play it cool, time is your friend here. Rush once, try twice. Don't rush!! Yeah, I’ve been talking to people today, they said don’t rush too. I will just roll with it, at least we’re going out and shes interested in me.
Fletch Lives Posted August 29, 2021 Posted August 29, 2021 Rush? If you are not getting a date every week or so, it's dead. That's ok, there are more fish in the sea.
Author Black Cement Posted August 29, 2021 Author Posted August 29, 2021 16 hours ago, Fletch Lives said: Rush? If you are not getting a date every week or so, it's dead. That's ok, there are more fish in the sea. It hasn’t been every week because of me, not her.
Miss Spider Posted August 29, 2021 Posted August 29, 2021 (edited) At this point, she may just be hanging with you as a friend. She may no longer ( or have ever) see you as a romantic prospect. There is a sect of people on dating sites that become friends with the people they meet there if the dating doesn’t work out. I’ve heard of it. I have a male friend that I see a few a week for about now. I have no attraction to him but he’s good company Edited August 29, 2021 by Cookiesandough
Author Black Cement Posted August 29, 2021 Author Posted August 29, 2021 3 hours ago, Cookiesandough said: At this point, she may just be hanging with you as a friend. She may no longer ( or have ever) see you as a romantic prospect. There is a sect of people on dating sites that become friends with the people they meet there if the dating doesn’t work out. I’ve heard of it. I have a male friend that I see a few a week for about now. I have no attraction to him but he’s good company Yeah maybe. But the fact that she doesn’t like going out, yet she makes the effort to go out and spend time with me is a sign. I really don’t know her intentions, so I’m just gonna roll with this and let things play out.
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