Wiseman2 Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 7 hours ago, Vivalavi said: I cheat on him and lie about MM existence or being faithful. It's wrong on many levels and also selfish. Ok. Then you ready know that you have to sneak around and communicate randomly so your husband won't find out. It's unclear why you would expect a consistent pattern of communication when you know the reasons there isn't. 2
ExpatInItaly Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 9 hours ago, Vivalavi said: However, if he is distant because he is pursuing someone else - that I can't understand. How low would that be of him???! Uh...now you know how his wife feels. 2
pepperbird2 Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 (edited) 11 hours ago, Vivalavi said: I don't understand anything anymore. That could be because you are not suited to being in an affair. It doesn't suit your moral compass, but you're trying to make it work anyway. What sort of psychological /emotional damage is this doing to you? Edited August 23, 2021 by pepperbird2 1 1
BaileyB Posted August 23, 2021 Posted August 23, 2021 1 minute ago, pepperbird2 said: That could be because you are not suited to being in an affair. It doesn't suit your moral compass, but you're trying to make it work anyway. What sort of psychological /emotional damage is this doing to you? Also not suited to being in an affair because she has the expectations that one would have in a legitimate relationship - that his communication be consistent, that he cares about her feelings, that he makes time for her, that her needs are important to him. With those expectations, past the initial honeymoon phase, affairs are always going to be disappointing and confusing experiences. 2 1
Author Vivalavi Posted August 23, 2021 Author Posted August 23, 2021 1 hour ago, pepperbird2 said: That could be because you are not suited to being in an affair. It doesn't suit your moral compass, but you're trying to make it work anyway. What sort of psychological /emotional damage is this doing to you? I've never thought of it until you pointed it out. I'm taking this crumbs because that's all I can get as someone married. It is such an emotional rollercoaster. I get anxiety, sadness. I question my worth and sanity. And I'm sure there is more than I can think of right now.
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