he's married, he cheated, he did me a favor- an enlightening post.

[lifestyle1]

My BF left his wife for me and we have been together 5 yrs. I left my H.

I divorced and he never finalised it, naming excuse after excuse. By year 4 I started pressuring him, and began to thin "he's just not that into me"

 

I discovered 5 days ago he was cheating - and he's gone- i changed the locks. moved his stuff into the garage. to add insult to injury he left behind a pic of us, my anniversary card to him and 1/2 of his share of the rent.

 

He is an avoidance addict- Basically a person who has intimacy issues. He is hostile and angry. He would measure me, control me, insists I double wash the whites, use clorox on the bath tiles, bring him coffee each morning, even make the bed with an army seargant way of folding the corner sheets-

but he loved me-

He was frustrated by me, because I didnt try hard enough, couldnt cook well enough, didnt do the laundry right, and his undershirts were crinkled form the wash - here I am ironing undershirts.

 

He would judge, put me down, measure, and critisize me until he wore down my spirit- but he loved me.

When i got on his nerves and he could no longer control his anger, he would explode with verbal abuse calling me names, threatening to leave if i didnt do what he said to do, giving me ultimatums- he used profanity- even tho I told him it was a deal breaker and made me feel degraded.

 

he would leave pissed off- and i was afraid it was over- so I would call and apologize promising to try harder at making him happy.

 

during his 17 yr marriage he had numerous affaris on his wife- and met me.

I suspect now with clarity that when his relationship became too stressful - rather than resolve issues with his partner, he AVOIDED them by distracting himself with a new sexual relationship. This diverted his attention and made it easier to return home to the "ball and chain"

 

so when we moved into together - the thought did cross my mind that he might do it TO ME. I discovered HE DID on friday by looking at his cell phone.

he denied and denied until I called the married woman up and revealed every detail to her, that I know he would not want her to know. Only then did he call me and say why are you saying bad things about me to Monica?

 

He told her we werent living togehter, he denied having a sexual relationship. just lunch and phone calls. he thought he could get pissed off at me, take a breather for the weekend (don;t call me , he said, I need to think) and return on Sunday. But I blew it, because- after discovering his infidelity- I cleared out the closets, and changed the locks.

 

When all is said. It has been 5 days- and I am sad. He had his sister return his RV and parked it in the wifes driveway (around the corner from our house)

so he just moved back into his kids lives, his wife's and the driveway.

 

I pass it on the way to my kids school. He saw my son yesterday and did not acknowledge him at all.

 

Lastly- he called me today at work and without even saying hello- asked me if I had any herpes medication, because his dick is all full of blisters.

 

THERE IS A GOD - YOU SON OF A BITCH.

[Scott S]

Lastly- he called me today at work and without even saying hello- asked me if I had any herpes medication, because his dick is all full of blisters.

 

I certainly hope he didn't share it with you! Or any other viruses, for that matter!

[wahaha1]

oh my gosh!! This is the most ridiculous story that I've ever heard...., the guy is truely a jerk.

 

I hope you are doing fine. Take care!

[Asmera]

I laughed so hard reading that last line of your thread! There truly is a God!!! I think you should try and get some counseling for the way he abused you. Get some for you kid(s) too. They need it very much! There's free counseling available out there for domestic abuse if you look hard enough. Emotional abuse is way worse than physical abuse, I know, I've been there! You're sad right now, but believe you me, you'll be soooooo much happier when you can move on. DO NOT GO BACK!!!! He's a jerk and abusers NEVER change no matter how much they promise, beg, or plead! Be thankful he cheated on you and be glad you had the guts to move him out. It'll be the best 200 pounds you've ever lost! Hang in there! You did the right thing!!!!!