I guess I'm a little nervous.

[jgraham11]

17 minutes ago, stillafool said:

Yeah, don't count on this.  If he has marks on his face (usually a tattooed tear) he is a murderer.  Those marks are a sign of pride with them.

Haha he doesn’t have tears under his eye. He’s a gangbanger, it’s not a stretch to say he’s taken shots at people I suppose, but I don’t know for sure. 

I know it may seem crazy I’m even entertaining the idea of this, but it’s like @Wiseman2said, drinks are pretty harmless and if I ever get a not so safe feeling at any point, I’ll just cut my losses and move on. I’ll be very careful not to invest too much emotionally early on until I get a full lay of the land. 

Edited August 15, 2021 by jgraham11

[stillafool]

7 minutes ago, jgraham11 said:

I’ll be very careful not to invest too much emotionally early on until I get a full lay of the land. 

That's kind of hard to do especially since you've had a crush on her for a while.  One kiss could catapult you into a problem.

[jgraham11]

1 minute ago, stillafool said:

That's kind of hard to do especially since you've had a crush on her for a while.  One kiss could catapult you into a problem.

I had a little crush on her before, now I don’t. We were just messaging back and forth on Instagram and I just figured, screw it, I’ll ask her if she wants to get drinks. I’d be fine walking away after the first date or 3rd or 4th date even. By then I’d have a good idea of what I’d be getting into. 

[mark clemson]

22 hours ago, jgraham11 said:

 He’s a gangbanger, it’s not a stretch to say he’s taken shots at people I suppose, but I don’t know for sure.

21 hours ago, jgraham11 said:

I’d be fine walking away after the first date or 3rd or 4th date even. By then I’d have a good idea of what I’d be getting into. 

YOU might be fine walking away, but HE might not be fine with letting you, at least not without "showing you who's boss" first, possibly via violence.

Since there's a kid, he's always going to be part of her life.

I think you're frankly unwise to be playing "white knight" here. From what little I have seen, gang members get used to extorting others in various ways through the threat of violence. Anyone in their social circle who doesn't have the "protection" of other gang types and has something they want tends to be fair game. I think that will PARTICULARLY be true of you as someone who connects to a former GF. He may show up one day with some buddies and guns seeking to clean out your bank account (or worse).

I think you're better off (and possibly MUCH better off) seeking a less problematic partner.

Edited August 16, 2021 by mark clemson