Couple questions about moving forward with multiple dates in a relationship

[Miss Spider]

42 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

Oh lord, I know what you mean, some guys simply CANNOT take no for an answer!  

In that case cookies, just block him.   You gave him the score, there is nothing further to discuss as far as I'm concerned.

And he'd be off my "maybe later" list after that too!!  Arghh!

Lol poppy he just wrote “that was the nicest back burner I’ve ever read”

Hahahah d***. 
 

yea he’s blocked 

Edited August 9, 2021 by Cookiesandough

[poppyfields]

You know, maybe this is precisely why people simply ghost.  To leave the door open in case whatever's going on that caused you to not want to date a particular person (at that point in time) didn't work out.

I suppose if they keep texting or calling, some sort of statement is necessary like things are crazy right now, but I dunno do most people do that?  Demand some sort of explanation when they get ghosted?

I've been ghosted once or twice and I never did.

One guy reached out again a couple of months later, told me a story of why he disappeared, and wanted to date me again but by then I had moved on.

@max3732what did you decide to do?

 

[Miss Spider]

13 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

You know, maybe this is precisely why people simply ghost.  To leave the door open in case whatever's going on that caused you to not want to date a particular person (at that point in time) didn't work out.

 

 

I’ve done it a lot and that’s been the main reasonIf I was certain I wasn’t ever going to be interested in the person ever then I would usually tell them that, but rarely is that the case

 

theres really no way to win, max lol

Edited August 10, 2021 by Cookiesandough

[max3732]

2 hours ago, chillii said:

Then focus on her and see how it goes op, all this multi bs is just exactly that bs. lf you've met someone worthwhile and your feeling into right now wth you shouldn't even want too you should want to be with her. ps if you wanna kiss longer just build up to kissing longer at nice times, no need to ask or say anything , she'll pull away a little at times if it's too much.  Good luck.

She actually invited me over so I'm hoping we'll be able to kiss some more where I don't feel so rushed. 

13 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

You know, maybe this is precisely why people simply ghost.  To leave the door open in case whatever's going on that caused you to not want to date a particular person (at that point in time) didn't work out.

I suppose if they keep texting or calling, some sort of statement is necessary like things are crazy right now, but I dunno do most people do that?  Demand some sort of explanation when they get ghosted?

I've been ghosted once or twice and I never did.

One guy reached out again a couple of months later, told me a story of why he disappeared, and wanted to date me again but by then I had moved on.

@max3732what did you decide to do?

 

I guess my intent with the message vs. ghosting was to let her know that I'm interested and an not leaving because of anything she said but rather because I found someone else. So I wanted to leave the door open if things don't work out. From what I'm reading here though I'm conveying just the opposite!

With 1 woman I sent something about finding someone like the "fixed" message. She sent me a response then blocked me but I have no idea what she said. With another one I sent a "lots going on now and don't have time to date" type message and she hasn't done anything.

The only other one is in another state and I'm not even sure why she messaged me. I haven't sent anything yet.

[poppyfields]

16 minutes ago, max3732 said:

With 1 woman I sent something about finding someone like the "fixed" message. She sent me a response then blocked me but I have no idea what she said.

If I had to render a guess it might have been "f*ck off," since she blocked you immediately thereafter!  LOL

Now that is NOT something I would ever say or do BUT never underestimate a woman scorned even if you're simply "dating."

That's why I don't recommend saying, some women might be cool with it, but others like I suspect the girl above, wouldn't take well to it.

Me?  I'd probably give you a polite response like "good luck, hope it works out," but I would never go out with you again if you were to ever circle back after being dumped by the first girl.

I wouldn't waste energy blocking in a situation like that.

This girl must have been pissed to do that imho!

 

Edited August 10, 2021 by poppyfields

[basil67]

On 8/7/2021 at 8:32 AM, SumGuy said:

Yes but at a certain age you pay the price the next day    

I reckon it's like the muscle pain after a good gym session.  It hurts, but it was worth it

[introverted1]

9 hours ago, poppyfields said:

If I had to render a guess it might have been "f*ck off," since she blocked you immediately thereafter!  LOL

Now that is NOT something I would ever say or do BUT never underestimate a woman scorned even if you're simply "dating."

That's why I don't recommend saying, some women might be cool with it, but others like I suspect the girl above, wouldn't take well to it.

Me?  I'd probably give you a polite response like "good luck, hope it works out," but I would never go out with you again if you were to ever circle back after being dumped by the first girl.

I wouldn't waste energy blocking in a situation like that.

This girl must have been pissed to do that imho!

Maybe I missed the plot but I don't think Max has even met these two women.  They were just chatting on the site and he was looking for a nice way to wrap things up rather than just disappear.  I think his message was fine in that context. 

[max3732]

34 minutes ago, introverted1 said:

Maybe I missed the plot but I don't think Max has even met these two women.  They were just chatting on the site and he was looking for a nice way to wrap things up rather than just disappear.  I think his message was fine in that context. 

That's correct! One I'd exchanged a few messages with and would normally have moved to asking her out for the 1st time.

The other I'd just matched with and had only exchanged like 2 or 3 messages

[poppyfields]

2 hours ago, introverted1 said:

Maybe I missed the plot but I don't think Max has even met these two women.  They were just chatting on the site and he was looking for a nice way to wrap things up rather than just disappear.  I think his message was fine in that context. 

I guess it was me who missed the plot, I thought he had actually been dating these other women!  

I think his message was fine too then in that context (or he could have used the "things are hectic right now" line) either one is fine.

Or just drop off.  When chatting on line before meeting (and only a couple of times?), people drop off all the time, I dont think a explanation is necessary in that context. 

And sorry max my head was in a really weird place yesterday!  No sleep the night before which always makes me a little crazy.

Not sure why that woman blocked you, seems like an overreaction. 

Edited August 10, 2021 by poppyfields

[max3732]

On 8/10/2021 at 9:35 AM, poppyfields said:

I guess it was me who missed the plot, I thought he had actually been dating these other women!  

I think his message was fine too then in that context (or he could have used the "things are hectic right now" line) either one is fine.

Or just drop off.  When chatting on line before meeting (and only a couple of times?), people drop off all the time, I dont think a explanation is necessary in that context. 

And sorry max my head was in a really weird place yesterday!  No sleep the night before which always makes me a little crazy.

Not sure why that woman blocked you, seems like an overreaction. 

The other woman just got back to me saying "thanks for letting me know". So I feel better with her that I didn't just ghost or block her.