Jump to content

Is it better for a man to need you or want you?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

In your opinion is it better to be needed or wanted by a man? I would honestly prefer both but mostly to be wanted. I feel like in some cases if a man needs you it may just be for what you can do for him or your resources. Your thoughts? 

Posted

Do we actually need anyone?

I'll go with option b.

  • Like 2
Posted

Why is the distinction important to you?  

I agree that want is better.  It's a choice where as need may be desperation.  

  • Like 1
Posted
31 minutes ago, Yungstagurl said:

I would honestly prefer both but mostly to be wanted. I feel like in some cases if a man needs you it may just be for what you can do for him or your resources. 

Ok, are you talking about someone using you like a mooch as far as "need" goes? I think you know that desiring you is better.

Posted

“Need” sounds like person has no choice in the matter. I pass on codependency thx 

  • Like 2
Posted
2 hours ago, Yungstagurl said:

In your opinion is it better to be needed or wanted by a man? I would honestly prefer both but mostly to be wanted. I feel like in some cases if a man needs you it may just be for what you can do for him or your resources. Your thoughts? 

What is need? What is want?

 

I want sex. I need her to have it.

 

Posted

I think Meatloaf had it down "I want you, I need you...but there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you"

More than his want or need, I want his love.

  • Like 2
Posted

I dont want to be needed. Its too Mother-y for me. Wanting me around and wanting me is much better 

Posted
35 minutes ago, basil67 said:

I think Meatloaf had it down "I want you, I need you...but there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you"

More than his want or need, I want his love.

And two out of three ain't bad. :)

I'll vote for love as well.

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
Posted (edited)

For me, it's better to be wanted and desired, not needed.

It's one reason why I've become so averse to committed relationships, at least how society defines; there is so much codependency, expectations and neediness, it's squelched a couple's basic desire for one another - sexual desire and true emotional connection.

Eventually, you begin to wonder, does my partner desire me OR are they going through the motions because they need me and have become emotionally dependent on me?  

Ever wonder why often times married couples or couples in committed relations seem to get on much better AFTER they break up?

During the marriage/relationship they rarely had sex, fought with each other and/or were bored to death with each other, then after they break up, suddenly their passion and desire returns and they're having sex like jack rabbits? Lol

I know a few couples like this and I myself contemplated this with one of my ex's a few years ago -  a FWB situation wherein we were truly friends, we cared for each other as true friends do, had sexual relations as a way to connect physically and emotionally, minus the "need" and "codependency" which destroys relationships imo.

Take the codependency and need away, and they once again feel their want for each other, their desire. 

Give to yourself what you need, and simply want and desire your partner, connect on that level, sexually, emotionally, spiritually, and everyone would be much happier and more fulfilled imho! 

 

 

Edited by poppyfields
  • Like 1
Posted
10 hours ago, poppyfields said:

For me, it's better to be wanted and desired, not needed.

Agree. But the semantics are strange in the opening post. Then there's the romantic notion of needing:

 

  • Like 2
Posted

maybe "want" is like more pursuing you, so i thought that want is more higher than need

but if man love you, he will wants and needs you 

  • Like 1
Posted
4 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Agree. But the semantics are strange in the opening post. Then there's the romantic notion of needing

Where would LS be if we didn't freight a single word with universal meaning and assume all people mean that when they say it?  And who is this Tom Petty guy to convey his own meaning? :)

I believe people want you to need them emotionally but don't want you to need them to take care of you.  I personally do not assume when some one says they "need" me it falls into either category.  So really cannot answer the OP's question as it presents a vague and possibly false dichotomy to me.

Context, behavior, more important than words and if seeking advice better to define what one means by want and need.  Really more important to me is are you getting what you want and what you need? 

  • Like 1
Posted

 

My woman loves to feel needed wanted loved and a million other things, and l love feeling the same from her, l dunno what the problem is it's a perfectly natural and beautiful thing. Real couples at peace have no need to play games just watch any old couple that are truly still in love, it's all there.

×
×
  • Create New...