Smurf1 Posted June 20, 2021 Posted June 20, 2021 Hi everyone! As I wrote in the title, I'm graduating from university (hopefully) in a couple of months. In 20 days I have to move back home definitely and since I realized it some days ago, I can't help feeling a deep sadness. To be more specific, I'm not gonna miss university as much as I'm gonna miss my flatmates, one of them in particular. I felt something clicked with her as soon as we introduced ourselves a couple of years ago, not in a romantic way, it's just that we get along very well, and I enjoy spend time with her: I feel I have this kind of friendship only with my closest friends from home. Unfortunately, the town where I'm from is far from hers, like 6 hours by train, even more by car, and I feel sad I won't be able to talk to her in persons as often as if we lived toghether or hang out with her and other people from university. Summing up, I really don't want this friendship to fade with time; of course we will stay in contact but it's just different. On the other hand, I know I have my lifelong friends waiting for me at home, and I'm so happy and grateful for that! I just don't get why what I just mentioned affect me so much these days and I'd like to find a bit of inner peace, also in order to enjoy these days at best! Have you ever been in a similar situation or have any advice for me? I already talk to my friends, but I feel a more adult and life-experienced tip could help a lot. Thank you so much!
d0nnivain Posted June 20, 2021 Posted June 20, 2021 Stop being so dramatic. I say that in a caring way. Yes, life will change & you won't have as many in person late night chats. It won't be easy to get together but you will still be friends. I graduated from college more than 30 years ago. Last week I talked to 2 of my sorority sisters. I'm doing a business deal with one of them. I talk to the closest ones at least once per month. We are making plans to get together as a big group in September. I see many of them at least once per year, more if we can manage it & we're flung far & wide more than a 6 hour train ride away. We all have open door policies. A couple of years ago I saw an ad for really cheap (under $100) plane tickets to a city where my old roommate lives. I book them, called her & announced I was coming over for the weekend. If somebody far away is within 4 hours we make the effort to get together. Once per year everybody flies in to NYC & we go to a charity fund raiser sponsored by our alma mater. We have vacationed together over the years, all around the globe & anticipate doing it again. Vacation plans are sometimes coordinated but sometimes they are just announced & whoever wants to tag along books a ticket. Over the years our husbands have independently become friendly. Long phone calls, lots of facetime / zoom calls & social media keep us close. They remain a great source of joy & support. You may be moving on to a different stage of your life, but that doesn't mean your friendship ends. It just takes a bit more effort to sustain it. Different isn't always bad.
Wiseman2 Posted June 20, 2021 Posted June 20, 2021 Make sure you have all the social media and contact info for your college friends. Also connect to everyone on LinkedIn, it will prove valuable in the future. Keep active in alumni activities/apps. Consider organizing a "reunion" party, even if it's just a ~6 mos. from now. When you get home, get on some dating apps and consider restarting your hometown life.
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