Why do some people get upset if I'm dating two women who I don't have a commitment with?

[mark clemson]

There's nothing inherently wrong with this as long as you're being honest about the fact that you're dating (and potentially sleeping with) other people. They don't even have to know about each other directly, just that "there are others".  If that's not acceptable they are of course free to leave.

There's no point in living your life according to other people's morals or worrying too much about what their opinions might be. As the saying goes, opinions are like armpits...

 

[Alpacalia]

6 hours ago, dramafreezone said:

There's almost always some element of that, wanting to "win" the person over.  If it wasn't, would we care so much about the opinions of others regarding the people we date?   The more social proof this dating prospect has, the more coveted they are, and the greater sense of accomplishment if we "get" them.

Some take it much further than others, to where their entire existence is about winning again and again, chasing that validation, and that translates into how many conquests they can rack up.  You don't need to look any further than those that date for the chase or the "challenge."  They don't realize that it's never enough.

I think the notion of wanting to win is woven into pretty much every walk of life in some way.

Perhaps.

However, in the context of multi-dating, when you are genuinely interested in someone, you feel a connection to them that is unique to the individual. You enjoy talking with them and anticipate doing activities with them. It's difficult to replace them with someone else because it wouldn't be that individual.

[Wiseman2]

Because "some people" are rolling thier eyes because bragging about what a player you are is quite insecure.

[basil67]

You've just started this thread about how you're sleeping with someone else's girlfriend.  Perhaps you're being judged because one of the women you're sleeping with has a partner?  That puts a completely different spin on things.

 

[dramafreezone]

19 hours ago, Alpaca said:

Perhaps.

However, in the context of multi-dating, when you are genuinely interested in someone, you feel a connection to them that is unique to the individual. You enjoy talking with them and anticipate doing activities with them. It's difficult to replace them with someone else because it wouldn't be that individual.

Well when that connection happens it happens, whether the dater is dating 5 women at the time or none.  In fact, I think multi-dating makes it much easier to identify strong matches.  When one is in scarcity (and isn't dating a lot) it's much easier to over-invest or look at that woman through rose-colored glasses.

Edited June 15, 2021 by dramafreezone

[IslandSanctuary]

Doesn't upset me, I just wouldn't 'date' you. 
Personally, I am of the opinion that 'dating' is a commitment in itself. 
It's just bad manners. Some people are ok with it - they can do whatever they want. 
We are creatures of habit, and life is short. 

[Alpacalia]

3 hours ago, dramafreezone said:

When one is in scarcity (and isn't dating a lot) it's much easier to over-invest or look at that woman through rose-colored glasses.

I wouldn't assume there's a scarcity issue if one is multi-dating.

Nonetheless, if someone's motivation for dating multiple people at once is to avoid being unduly emotionally connected, and it works for them, that's great.

Everyone is unique in terms of emotional capacity and what they can handle emotionally before becoming involved with others.