How do you stop caring that your ex is with someone else?

[stopcaringbro]

someone else with them ,having sex, getting to be with them?

[stopcaringbro]

anyone?

[Gaeta]

Are you looking at their social media?

[dramafreezone]

It just takes time.

Getting over an ex is pretty much like detox.  The attachment to that other person is due to pleasure chemicals your body produces in response to this other person.  They're imprinted on your mind but you're no longer getting the chemical response.

You're going to go through withdrawal and it's going to suck but it will end.  Filling your time with hobbies, keeping your mind occupied helps.

Edited June 2, 2021 by dramafreezone

[stopcaringbro]

3 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

Are you looking at their social media?

yea i used to but now i stopped but i still think about it and feel bummed out 

[stopcaringbro]

3 minutes ago, dramafreezone said:

It just takes time.

Getting over an ex is pretty much like detox.  The attachment to that other person is due to pleasure chemicals your body produces in response to this other person.  They're imprinted on your mind but you're no longer getting the chemical response.

You're going to go through withdrawal and it's going to suck but it will end.  Filling your time with hobbies, keeping your mind occupied helps.

So what happens over time? it was my first relationship? do you start forgetting or one day just don't care about them anymore? what happens? 

 

[basil67]

Yes, you start forgetting and eventually don't care about them anymore.   In the meantime, it's OK to feel what you feel....just try to not dwell there too long.

[stopcaringbro]

7 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Yes, you start forgetting and eventually don't care about them anymore.   In the meantime, it's OK to feel what you feel....just try to not dwell there too long.

i feel bad ill forget them i loved them should i be happy to forget them? why do i still care bout them?

[dramafreezone]

3 minutes ago, stopcaringbro said:

i feel bad ill forget them i loved them should i be happy to forget them? why do i still care bout them?

I don't think you'll forget them.  I remember every girlfriend I've ever had. 

That feeling of deep attachment will fade, but it takes time.  You'll forge new friendships and romantic relationships.

[stopcaringbro]

10 minutes ago, dramafreezone said:

I don't think you'll forget them.  I remember every girlfriend I've ever had. 

That feeling of deep attachment will fade, but it takes time.  You'll forge new friendships and romantic relationships.

our relationship was about 7-8 months how long will it take for it to fade? i loved her deeply

[Ami1uwant]

Why did it rnd?

[stopcaringbro]

4 minutes ago, Ami1uwant said:

Why did it rnd?

it was really bad they left me for someone else but it was my fault i wasn't myself and they lost attraction to me i know people will say why should u care for someone who will do that to you but i blame myself 

[Lotsgoingon]

You have to stop missing the other person ... let them go ... so you don't care.

One big step is to focus on the weaknesses of the ex--all the things you didn't like of the ex. You gotta get your mind there.

[stopcaringbro]

4 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said:

You have to stop missing the other person ... let them go ... so you don't care.

One big step is to focus on the weaknesses of the ex--all the things you didn't like of the ex. You gotta get your mind there.

but she was so amazing, she was beautiful ,sexy, she was really fun, we had a great connection i always felt so happy when i ws with her, she always had fun date ideas.. i could do anyting with her and we would be having fun. i loved her so much

[Lotsgoingon]

You're romanticizing her. No one is that good all the time. You need to engage your critical brain. Right now, you are just drowning in love chemicals. You got to shut off those chemicals. They just create illusions that hurt you.

What were her flaws? If you can't identify any, then you need to do some work before dating again.

[stopcaringbro]

2 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said:

You're romanticizing her. No one is that good all the time. You need to engage your critical brain. Right now, you are just drowning in love chemicals. You got to shut off those chemicals. They just create illusions that hurt you.

What were her flaws? If you can't identify any, then you need to do some work before dating again.

flaws

- really immature

- been with over 100 guys

- always wanted ttention and validaton

- really clingy and needy

but she was so fun and always had fun date ideas and was so enuthastic and energetic

[Lotsgoingon]

Ok, you got some material to work with. 

[stopcaringbro]

6 minutes ago, Lotsgoingon said:

Ok, you got some material to work with. 

she ws just so fun and sexy and always wanted to go out and do fun dates she was the best gf seriously i f***ed up