Philosopher Posted May 22, 2021 Posted May 22, 2021 If you are speaking to someone on a dating site or app and they do not reply to your message, after you have both exchanged one or two messages, is it a good or bad idea to message them again? Has anyone tried this and if they did, did it work out well or not?
Miss Spider Posted May 22, 2021 Posted May 22, 2021 (edited) It works. I’ve been on dates with guys who have done this. When I was online dating, I was talking to a ton of people and people would get buried in the inbox. Gotta bump yourself sometimes. Not much to lose Edited May 22, 2021 by Cookiesandough 5
Wiseman2 Posted May 22, 2021 Posted May 22, 2021 37 minutes ago, Philosopher said: If you are speaking to someone on a dating site or app and they do not reply to your message, after you have both exchanged one or two messages, is it a good or bad idea to message them again? Has anyone tried this and if they did, did it work out well or not? Were any of the messages suggesting getting together for coffee/meeting? Try that, if no response, just go to the next. 3
Author Philosopher Posted May 22, 2021 Author Posted May 22, 2021 1 hour ago, Wiseman2 said: Were any of the messages suggesting getting together for coffee/meeting? Try that, if no response, just go to the next. The most recent time where I have been tempted to message someone again I did suggest meeting up, however the time before that I was tempted to do this I had not suggested meeting up. In both these cases I did not message them again.
Miss Spider Posted May 22, 2021 Posted May 22, 2021 (edited) 31 minutes ago, Philosopher said: The most recent time where I have been tempted to message someone again I did suggest meeting up, however the time before that I was tempted to do this I had not suggested meeting up. In both these cases I did not message them again. They got bored/lost interest . I’d say your chances to revive it are about 15% but like I said, it’s happen w me, and with such little effort( few keystrokes), shoot your shot. Agree with wiseman it should be about meeting Edited May 22, 2021 by Cookiesandough
norealusername Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 I think you can send 1 more message after you don't get a reply. If they don't respond after that, it's probably time to give up on them. I can't actually recall this ever happening to me though.
Blind-Sided Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 Yep... make one last reach out, and be specific about a meeting. Something easy like coffee.
d0nnivain Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 You can but you best wait 48-72 hours between the 1st & 2nd message.
chillii Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 Sure if you wanna try why not, if you don't mind the possibility of probably being ignored ,so what, worlds not gonna end either way. 1
smackie9 Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 I would say it wouldn't hurt to ask them out BUT usually it means they are not really interested. But what does it matter? You try, you don't get a yes, you move on. I would recommend asking them out asap....don't chat for weeks. Let them know you are serious/interested.
LauraXX Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 Of course, you‘ve got nothing to lose. My last relationship wouldn‘t have happened if the guy hadn‘t sent a „Hello? You still there?“ message. However, I‘d wait 2-3 days. I was texting with a guy a few weeks ago and he seemed nice. Then I didn‘t open the app for three days and saw that he had texted me every single day, pretending that we were having a dialogue: Day 1: Hello, how are you? I did X and Y today. Now enjoying a glass of wine. Day 2: Hello, how are you? I just came home from work. Looking forward to the weekend. What are you up to? Day 3: Hello, how are you? Going for a hike today. What are you up to? I know it sounds bad, but that kind of gave me „the ick“.
SumGuy Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 On 5/22/2021 at 4:20 PM, Philosopher said: If you are speaking to someone on a dating site or app and they do not reply to your message, after you have both exchanged one or two messages, is it a good or bad idea to message them again? Has anyone tried this and if they did, did it work out well or not? One more after you have a bit of a rapor is fine. Generally it is a sign they found someone else but could just be life got in the way. I generally mention both situations and cool with it. Usually it was they decide to pursue someone else. I let them know I'm eminently cool with that (not in those words necessarily) and wish them luck...recognize they are humans with the hope and dreams and uncertainty like you. It can make a person's day and if there is any chance they will look you up later this will make it happen. (I have been looked up later for the record.) If life just got busy, or they want to go with that, things pick back up. Bottom line on things like this for me is give people a way to save face and make sure they know you are cool with whatever the truth may be. Sometimes you hear back nothing and you have your answer there but can rest at night knowing you gave them/it a chance.
dramafreezone Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 (edited) Best way to succeed with OLD is first to not give a dang about things like this. If she matched with you, whether or not you actually end up going out has to do more with timing than anything else. Maybe she's wrapping something up with a guy that she had previous interest in. Or maybe she's getting serious with someone. You've got nothing to lose because she's not going to message you back if you do nothing. What I don't think will happen is her looking at your message and thinking 'oh I was on the fence about that guy before but since he messaged me I'm definitely not interested." You are off of her radar right now so sending a message isn't going to cost you anything. Edited May 23, 2021 by dramafreezone
Trail Blazer Posted May 23, 2021 Posted May 23, 2021 On 5/23/2021 at 5:53 AM, Cookiesandough said: It works. I’ve been on dates with guys who have done this. When I was online dating, I was talking to a ton of people and people would get buried in the inbox. Gotta bump yourself sometimes. Not much to lose Yeah, this. Sometimes girls get overwhelmed by messages and it doesn't necessarily mean she's not interested. I've 'bumped' myself before and it's resulted in a date. I wouldn't do it more than once if she doesn't reply, though.
cleverusername Posted May 24, 2021 Posted May 24, 2021 Never double text personally when there isn't some sort of acknowledgment. Doing so gives them a pass to play games. If its an honest mistake and they miss it or whatever they can admit it like a grown adult and we can move on (honesty and integrity is important to me). Or they can keep ignoring and I have my answer. Either way I win. 1
Recommended Posts