Allupinnit Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 7 minutes ago, Kyrak said: Fyi, I uploaded a "hot" selfie and few minutes after posting it, he went and checked my stories after not viewing them for two three days I think. I get it, it's just lust. Any ideas how can I turn this to my advantage? Speaking purely about hooking up and not losing my power I've found that often times the most powerful thing I can do as a woman is nothing at all. Even though it's casual I don't think men like it when we act all thirsty. Let him reach out to you. I feel like you're very invested in this guy beyond sex, though - you're sweating him.
Author Kyrak Posted May 20, 2021 Author Posted May 20, 2021 3 minutes ago, Allupinnit said: I've found that often times the most powerful thing I can do as a woman is nothing at all. Even though it's casual I don't think men like it when we act all thirsty. Let him reach out to you. I feel like you're very invested in this guy beyond sex, though - you're sweating him. Just like the game, it's thrilling me. But no emotions are there.
Author Kyrak Posted May 20, 2021 Author Posted May 20, 2021 7 minutes ago, Allupinnit said: I've found that often times the most powerful thing I can do as a woman is nothing at all. Even though it's casual I don't think men like it when we act all thirsty. Let him reach out to you. I feel like you're very invested in this guy beyond sex, though - you're sweating him. How is he related with me posting pictures of myself once in a while? Yeah, it does seem thirsty but I'm not directly engaging him so he can only assume. Apart from that message three days ago, haven't reached out haven't stalked him (we're literally only connected on instagram and he isn't active there) haven't post anything related to him. If he finds my content annoying, he can unfollow was just asking if men are visual creatures posting looking good or hot is nice trick to use once in a while (ofc nothing aggressive)
Allupinnit Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 17 minutes ago, Kyrak said: How is he related with me posting pictures of myself once in a while? Yeah, it does seem thirsty but I'm not directly engaging him so he can only assume. Apart from that message three days ago, haven't reached out haven't stalked him (we're literally only connected on instagram and he isn't active there) haven't post anything related to him. If he finds my content annoying, he can unfollow was just asking if men are visual creatures posting looking good or hot is nice trick to use once in a while (ofc nothing aggressive) Sure, but you asked what ELSE you could do. I'm saying don't do anything else. I get it, you like the chase.
Allupinnit Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 Also his following your "stories" doesn't say anything. He may have just lost interest.
Author Kyrak Posted May 20, 2021 Author Posted May 20, 2021 31 minutes ago, Allupinnit said: Also his following your "stories" doesn't say anything. He may have just lost interest. Yes I get this point doesn't mean anything of course and it's not a factor of interest. However, I am aware that whenever I post a selfie or picture of myself being outside he checks the stories and when I don't he doesn't bother. As far as doing anything else, I absolutely will not cause I like the chase but maximum 1-2 times initiating and stating interest. After that, ball on their court. Just enjoying the attention cause he's attracted to me I am aware (doesn't mean he wants to pursue further or chase or progress things but doesn't mind showing a bit of lust which I don't mind)
introverted1 Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 2 minutes ago, Kyrak said: Just like the game, it's thrilling me. But no emotions are there. We've got 4 pages of posts about this guy, and you're saying no emotions are there. I guess he has a golden dick, then, because why else would you be this obsessed with someone who isn't showing as much interest in you? 3
Author Kyrak Posted May 20, 2021 Author Posted May 20, 2021 Referring to lust as sexual attraction nothing more don't get me wrong.
Author Kyrak Posted May 20, 2021 Author Posted May 20, 2021 Just now, introverted1 said: We've got 4 pages of posts about this guy, and you're saying no emotions are there. I guess he has a golden dick, then, because why else would you be this obsessed with someone who isn't showing as much interest in you? Well good technique and quite good dick. If it's annoying you may stop following the topic, I'm gathering opinions not here to bother or insult anyone but it seems you're insulting me with such a comment but thank you for the obvious use of sarcasm.
Sun Seeker Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 Sleeping around so much with anyone and everyone implies you have very low standards.. which is a massive turn off for most guys, me included. Also you say you want just casual, but are expecting more. Lastly being in a proper relationship will satisfy your sexual needs better and more often, than these encounters. This guy has probably realised the reward is not worth it for all the extra hassle that comes with it, and I can see why. 2
Author Kyrak Posted May 20, 2021 Author Posted May 20, 2021 16 minutes ago, Punterxx said: Sleeping around so much with anyone and everyone implies you have very low standards.. which is a massive turn off for most guys, me included. Also you say you want just casual, but are expecting more. Lastly being in a proper relationship will satisfy your sexual needs better and more often, than these encounters. This guy has probably realised the reward is not worth it for all the extra hassle that comes with it, and I can see why. Respectable opinion. I don't see myself as a reward and frankly I don't much live by these unspoken rules. I'm just doing me, poor decisions or not will claim them and learn and progress. I won't skip the fun element in my encounters and exactly because I slept around a lot I'm trying to make my own rules to enjoy it. And casual requires some level of interaction bare minimum but it does. Anyhow, it seems you people are quick to judge behind a computer without really knowing the person so I'll take any opinion with a grain of salt. 1
GeorgiaPeach1 Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 21 hours ago, Cookiesandough said: Ohh boom bingo bango, that’s it .. the main chick got mad, she probably got jelly. she’s probably like let me see your phone, don’t respond, delete that ***s number lol. She said she’s cool with poly, but she either just relunctantly agreed or she means on her side only haha at least that’s what I think might have happened here. And I agree it’s hard to see someone as too desperate if you know they just want sex and you want the same... and it’s good... Sucks since it was, but I think you need to keep searching for a fwb who doesn’t have strings attached because this guy sounds a bit too messy. He won’t be convenient enough to be a good, steady fwb to you that keeps in regular contact like you’re looking for. I’ve never had fwb, but I’m sure what you’re looking for exists. Somewhere in the middle between f buddies and bf/gf . Esp since you found one in the past No one, not even the OP, has spoken with the "main chick", as you call her. How could anyone here know how she's feeling, what she did or what she agreed to?
introverted1 Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 1 hour ago, Kyrak said: Well good technique and quite good dick. If it's annoying you may stop following the topic, I'm gathering opinions not here to bother or insult anyone but it seems you're insulting me with such a comment but thank you for the obvious use of sarcasm. Sorry you feel offended, not my intent. It just seems that you are quite invested in this guy, in spite of repeatedly asserting that you have no emotions for him. For whatever reason, he seems to be fading out - maybe his gf isn't on board, maybe he senses that you want more than he has to offer, maybe he's bored with the sex, maybe he's juggling multiple FWBs... who knows, could be almost anything. I guess what is puzzling is why, if there is no emotional attachment on your side, you don't just find another guy. I am pretty sure dating sites have a fair share of guys who'd be happy to have a casual NSA arrangement. 3
Miss Spider Posted May 20, 2021 Posted May 20, 2021 (edited) 5 hours ago, GeorgiaPeach1 said: No one, not even the OP, has spoken with the "main chick", as you call her. How could anyone here know how she's feeling, what she did or what she agreed to? Never said I knew.. It was just an idea/ conjecture based on what the OP has shared about the situation and what she has heard/witnessed ... like 99% of like everything else on this forum . Why not reply to the all the other ideas like he has an exclusive gf or wife etc asking why they’re giving an opinion if they don’t know ? Bc no one here actually does My reasoning was based in open relationships I’ve seen where there are usually people who are the main bf/gf... makes sense because there are always people we are more intimate/feel closer to than others even if you want to also be intimate /have sex/get close to others too & I’ve also seen a comical amount of jealousy occur in such relationships Edited May 20, 2021 by Cookiesandough
Alvi Posted May 21, 2021 Posted May 21, 2021 (edited) I read some of your posts OP on here, not all of them but enough. OK, what is the problem exactly here? I mean, if you post on a dating site that you are looking for sex and nothing but sex or are looking for a FWB arrangement, you would be bombarded by guys. No shortage of suitors to pick and choose from. They should be chasing you, begging you to choose them and not the other way around. There are probably men who are better in sack than your guy. You might even specify that you are looking for a well-endowed guy who is good in sack in your profile, lol. Why are you so desperate and are throwing yourself at this particular guy? Is it because he is the "unattainable" one, the one who had his way with you and doesn't want any more repeats? Is it because your ego is bruised and cannot handle that he dared to cast you aside? He might come back to you at some point, he might not, never know. There could be a hundred reasons why he chooses to ignore you for now. What I don't get is why if you want just sex without any emotions, you cannot replace him? And very easily at that. Have all the fun you want, sleep with as many men as you want, if that is what you want to do, but don't get upset if one of them leaves. Replace him right away. One of my male friends told me once that a woman who is looking for FWB is considered to be very desirable by men. She could be grossly overweight, have no job, have 5 kids by 6 different guys and guess what? There is going to be a line-up of guys who are going to tell her that she is beautiful, wonderful and very desirable. Of course, none of these guys would ever consider her a relationship material but it's not like she is looking for a relationship herself. Edited May 21, 2021 by Alvi
Alvi Posted May 21, 2021 Posted May 21, 2021 (edited) 8 hours ago, Kyrak said: won't skip the fun element in my encounters and exactly because I slept around a lot I'm trying to make my own rules to enjoy it. And that's how it should be. On your own terms. But don't get too attached to a guy and also don't expect anything from him. Just enjoy as long as the ride lasts. When it is over, pick another candidate. Edited May 21, 2021 by Alvi
Alpacalia Posted May 21, 2021 Posted May 21, 2021 (edited) If you want the type of relationship you seek it's probably best to date single, available men. It's counterproductive for you that if he's messing around with you, honesty and dependability can't be high on your list of priorities. Nor can respect, availability, and being his top priority. That’s fine if that’s what you want, but chances are, you don't. Edited May 21, 2021 by Alpaca
Author Kyrak Posted May 21, 2021 Author Posted May 21, 2021 12 hours ago, introverted1 said: Sorry you feel offended, not my intent. It just seems that you are quite invested in this guy, in spite of repeatedly asserting that you have no emotions for him. For whatever reason, he seems to be fading out - maybe his gf isn't on board, maybe he senses that you want more than he has to offer, maybe he's bored with the sex, maybe he's juggling multiple FWBs... who knows, could be almost anything. I guess what is puzzling is why, if there is no emotional attachment on your side, you don't just find another guy. I am pretty sure dating sites have a fair share of guys who'd be happy to have a casual NSA arrangement. Yeah I do sleep around with random guys but I felt comfortable with this one. Anyhow, doesn't matter anymore. I will let it be.
Wiseman2 Posted May 21, 2021 Posted May 21, 2021 Sounds like you need a more consistent hookup partner. Hanging out with flakes and married guys is a waste of time. 3
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