Griff22 Posted May 10, 2021 Posted May 10, 2021 So my ex girlfriend (also baby momma) recently broke up with her boyfriend of I'd say just over a year, she basically drunk called me the night of the break up but I was asleep. Anyway we got talking and I slept with her a few times and then she got back with her boyfriend within a few weeks. Then another week or so later, he broke up with her and again she was back texting me within a couple of days and you guessed it, I was back sleeping with her. It was going great for about a month and a half until a few days ago she told me she was back seeing him even though I was only with her a few days before. Now I was kinda pissed off because I was in a nice position with the sex and not having to deal with her as a girlfriend and my child is getting confused seeing mom and dad together and then mom and her boyfriend.... So I decided she can't be going from one to the other when she wants so I let her boyfriend know I've been sleeping with her the whole time and he didn't seem bothered at all! If I was him her ass would be gone! But is the guy lacking self respect and dignity or what? Had a huge fight with my ex over the situation and apparently Im the only guy that would feel this way. Another question... Is this it for the next few years? Are we going to be constantly on and off? I would say that I care about her because she's the mother of my child but I wouldn't be interested in going past just having sex with her. We're definitely not a good match but when it does come to the bedroom theres no other woman that makes me feel the way I do like her, I know I'm a man and its normal but I have an extra high sex drive and she knows how to use it. We're both still young, I'm 23 and she's 22 soon (our kid is 2). Sorry if this is a long ass post but I'd like some opinions on the whole thing, looking back on it I definitely shouldn't have told her bf that we were sleeping together but I was pissed off and also felt bad for the guy. Anyway thanks for reading!
Wiseman2 Posted May 10, 2021 Posted May 10, 2021 7 minutes ago, Griff22 said: my child is getting confused seeing mom and dad together and then mom and her boyfriend.. Sorry if this is a long ass post Don't get yourself or your child get caught up in her unstable drunkenness and on/off nonsense with her BF. Triangles lead to headaches and heartaches you're talking about. Not to mention STDs and confusion for your child. 1
Author Griff22 Posted May 10, 2021 Author Posted May 10, 2021 23 minutes ago, Wiseman2 said: Don't get yourself or your child get caught up in her unstable drunkenness and on/off nonsense with her BF. Triangles lead to headaches and heartaches you're talking about. Not to mention STDs and confusion for your child. I guess its just hard to see anything else considering I've been single since we broke up, I just don't have the time to be dating and when she became single I couldn't resist getting it from her! I just have to be stronger it seems, I do like that "Triangles lead to headaches and heartaches" line though. Thanks for the advice 1
ExpatInItaly Posted May 11, 2021 Posted May 11, 2021 9 hours ago, Griff22 said: But is the guy lacking self respect and dignity or what? No moreso than you are. She clearly came to you as a rebound/filler when she was having a rough time with her boyfriend, and you jumped right back in. Dude. How did you not see what was going on there? Don't throw stones at her bofyriend when you didn't demonstrate self-respect, either. It's time to find your own dignity and stop letting this woman yank your chain. This isn't good for you, and it's not good for your child. And it is not all her fault when you're volunteering to participate, so watch where you place the blame on that one. You and her clearly don't work as a couple. It's time you both matured a bit and cut the crap, going your separate ways romantically but co-parenting peacefully. 2 1
Blind-Sided Posted May 11, 2021 Posted May 11, 2021 Yep... I agree with @ExpatInItaly You don't have any self respect for yourself. OK... you broke up with her, and know you two are no good together. AND... sure... she broke up with her BF, and you got a little from her. But when she went back to her BF... you should have NEVER tried a second time to sleep with her. When she called you... that's when you should have told her to piss off. AND... it's not your position to contact her BF. That was done by you out of jealousy. Besides... if I was dating a girl, and the exFB and baby daddy contacted me... I don't think I would trust/believe him. (it's probably why to you it seemed like he had no dignity) On the point of "She is the only one to make you feel a certain way in bed"... well guess what???? There are lots of girls out there who are good in the sack, and you just need to get out and date again. Sorry I couldn't just be on your side. 2
Author Griff22 Posted May 11, 2021 Author Posted May 11, 2021 34 minutes ago, Blind-Sided said: Yep... I agree with @ExpatInItaly You don't have any self respect for yourself. OK... you broke up with her, and know you two are no good together. AND... sure... she broke up with her BF, and you got a little from her. But when she went back to her BF... you should have NEVER tried a second time to sleep with her. When she called you... that's when you should have told her to piss off. AND... it's not your position to contact her BF. That was done by you out of jealousy. Besides... if I was dating a girl, and the exFB and baby daddy contacted me... I don't think I would trust/believe him. (it's probably why to you it seemed like he had no dignity) On the point of "She is the only one to make you feel a certain way in bed"... well guess what???? There are lots of girls out there who are good in the sack, and you just need to get out and date again. Sorry I couldn't just be on your side. No worries man, Completely respect and appreciate both opinions, I thought I made it clear that I wasn't looking for anything more than just sex with her, the thing that mainly pissed me off was that we were doing family things together, we broke up so early that I never had those experiences, it was always just me and my kid. It was annoying that she could just jump back to her BF after seeing my kid so happy with both of us. If I was standing talking to my ex and I was holding my kid in my arms, she'd literally grab both our heads and push us together to kiss! And when that happens its like damn I'm sorry we're not together for her. As for telling her bf like I stated It was probably the wrong thing to do, that was mostly me putting myself in his shoes, atleast he could decide if he wanted to be with her still or not, personally I wouldn't... Heres the thing, if we didn't have a kid together, I know for a fact I wouldn't have seen my ex since the day we broke up, I see her on a regular basis and there is of course always going to be some sort of attraction or something. After we had the fight on Saturday, and when it was calm she was sitting on the counter with one leg along it and I was next to her she curled her foot around my waist smiling at me if she wanted me to make a move ( while her bf was in the other room) I think if there's people out there that think that behaviour is OK and none of her BFs business are pretty sick....
Author Griff22 Posted May 11, 2021 Author Posted May 11, 2021 5 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said: No moreso than you are. She clearly came to you as a rebound/filler when she was having a rough time with her boyfriend, and you jumped right back in. Dude. How did you not see what was going on there? Don't throw stones at her bofyriend when you didn't demonstrate self-respect, either. It's time to find your own dignity and stop letting this woman yank your chain. This isn't good for you, and it's not good for your child. And it is not all her fault when you're volunteering to participate, so watch where you place the blame on that one. You and her clearly don't work as a couple. It's time you both matured a bit and cut the crap, going your separate ways romantically but co-parenting peacefully. I saw what was going on, we both used eachother but I foolishly left it go beyond just sex I think. That other longer reply to blind sided ties in with what you said. Appreciate the opinions guys/gals
d0nnivain Posted May 11, 2021 Posted May 11, 2021 You want her back. That is why you let this go on. You told her BF in a transparent powerplay, thinking he'd dump her & she'd come crying back to you permanently. If you want off this merry go round, you have to stop sleeping with her. Think about your child. The kid will be very confused & HURT by mommy & daddy's instability. Be really careful.
ExpatInItaly Posted May 11, 2021 Posted May 11, 2021 8 hours ago, Griff22 said: I think if there's people out there that think that behaviour is OK and none of her BFs business are pretty sick.... It's not that it's none of his business. It's that you deride him for lacking self-respect when you do, too. She plays both of you for fools. 1
Recommended Posts