ACE12345 Posted May 7, 2021 Posted May 7, 2021 Hi.. I haven’t dated anyone in a few years .. and since then I have become kind of OCD.. mainly being prepared for anything like overthinking about safety... including many little details about items all over the house so my infant relatives I live with will always be safe.. and also being organized to the point of having every thing I have perfectly placed neatly... I am 31.. I am going to get back into dating. Do you think that this would be a turn off for women? thank you :)
Wiseman2 Posted May 7, 2021 Posted May 7, 2021 (edited) 9 hours ago, ACE12345 said: my infant relatives I live with will always be safe.. ... I am 31.. There's nothing wrong with being organized but if it's paralyzing you there is medical treatment and supportive therapy . Do you live with parents and relatives? At 31 that may be more of an impediment to dating than being organized. Bottom line, if you are just neat clean organized etc. fine, but if you have an anxiety disorder you need to see a physician for an evaluation. Edited May 7, 2021 by Wiseman2 1
spiderowl Posted May 9, 2021 Posted May 9, 2021 If it is more than just being a tidy person - and it sounds like it is - then you need to seek out therapy if you want a partner. Very few people would cope with OCD but, you never know, you might meet someone equally OCD. It depends really on whether you feel it is affecting your chances in life in general? Doing many of the things you do is not going to make you safer, though it might make your infant relatives safer. Generally though, OCD tends to crowd out other things including relationships and a more carefree life. It might help you to have therapy anyway, to see if it helps you in ways you hadn't thought of.
d0nnivain Posted May 9, 2021 Posted May 9, 2021 It depends on how significant your OCD is & how you respond if a new person moves something. If you scream at her this won't work
Atwood Posted May 9, 2021 Posted May 9, 2021 (edited) If you have OCD you need to be prepared for the reality that it is not your partner's responsibility to join in with your OCD thoughts, rituals, urges, or behaviours. I understand how important those beliefs and feelings are but I would recommend seeking treatment and discuss dating with a therapist. It will help you get an idea of how best to approach it healthily so that you can maximize your chances of success in the long run. It might not seem that important when you're just thinking about getting back into the game, but if you meet someone you really like and continue to fall in love with them, it'll be really helpful to have those strategies in your back pocket. edit: having a mental health disorder isn't a turn-off by itself - the way you deal with it is what makes or breaks it. Being self-reflective, striving for health and wellbeing, and not allowing it to result in abusive or manipulative behaviour towards others is what makes the difference. If you take yourself too seriously and become angry, defensive or have issues controlling or regulating emotions, that can be difficult. Edited May 9, 2021 by Atwood 2
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