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  • Author
Posted

yes it is true, that was just in the morning and I will not continue the chat with her. I wont block her though (no need from my side), I expect her to just not contact me and if she does will either ignore it or tell her to back off.

  • Like 1
Posted

You don't have to block her. Blocking is best when the other person is a pest -- not going away after you tell them too -- or when you are hurt by seeing them.  Neither is true here.  You simply want her to pick you & get back together.  For that you have properly left the ball in her court & by your actions, separating yourself from her, you are showing that you won't settle for crumbs or be the OM

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  • Author
Posted (edited)

Thank you that is what I will do. Honestly, I believe I do not have a problem with not contacting her, I think my problem would be when she is writing me which she probably will do again.

What should I do then? Ignore? Tell her to only write me when she is serious?

Edited by LoveIdiot
Posted

I'd probably send back different versions of 

Thanks for reaching out.  When you leave him & are ready to come back fully to me, we can talk more.  I won't wait forever.  

You have to be consistent.  

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  • Author
Posted (edited)

Thank you! On the upside I can say that I slept normally again finally. I had slept like only 5 hours for the past weeks, that sucked.

Edited by LoveIdiot
Posted
23 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

There is no "strategy" here. You'll need to step back. For your own peace of mind. Stop contacting her or leaving gifts or showing up

I AgReE

 

2 hours ago, elaine567 said:

My advice is to forget her and find another.
Next time try your best to not mess up, get your head in order, as messing up is rarely forgiven, second chances are very rare.

AmEn

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted

OK, I'd like to update you on how this all developed. The final point is still the same, however, it was quite an experience with ups and downs here and there. Yes, I did make some mistakes, so what, I do not care.

 

So, two weeks ago I told her I did not want to persue contact with her. I stood firm with this. On friday, she wrote me an angry/sad message how she felt like I was throwing her away once she had no more use for me and how all those feelings of last year where she felt hurt came back.

I did not yield and responded that was sorry to hear, but she has to understand the situation and my decision. She then formally apologized. I added how she was an awesome woman and blabla but at the moment how it does not work for me.

 

HOWEVER i got weak during the afternoon and told her I'd like to be near her. She asked me to come by. I did. We had sex then. She had to leave soon after and we met again the following monday and had a very nice evening, I stayed for 6 hours. She told me how she enjoyed it and chatted rather lovely with me. The next day, she declined meeting up, saying she was tired (she honestly has to take care of alot and work alot) but called me later on. I was disappointed, but it was still a little nice. The next day I asked if we could meet again, she declined again. 

Her up and down started to get on my nerves and I got a tad bit annoyed. The next day, last thursday, things erupted a little, I annoyed her with a comment and she canceled our meeting on friday. This triggered my doubts on the whole situation and I told her I'd have to go back to no contact. Some messages later she came to my place and we made out a little and talked more. We met on friday and had sex again, it was nice but right afterwards she was again a little cold. She met up with her boyfriend on saturday and was especially distant. I called her on sunday asking when we would meet again, she previously told me how she was busy blabla. I told her I didnt like that and she asked whether Id wanna come by now. So I did, this was two days ago. 

We had a nice time and things eventually got to the point of her saying she cannot go on like this, it was not her and she just could not be with me at the moment. She added "I love you" but because of her kid and her hurt feelings from last year (and also some blabla how our lifes are so different ...) she just could not do it at the moment. I told her I love her too. That was quite sad. I also added that I would entirely ignore her then as this is not acceptable for me. She was rather baffled. Not sure what she thought would happen.

Now of course she contacted me again today (albeit I wrote her a few messages yesterday, yes, I am ********) about some stuff. I will stay firm this time for real though. My god this sucks.

Writing this I realize a bit that this is indeed over. Thank you for reading. I doubt there will be any update.  

 

Posted
2 hours ago, LoveIdiot said:

I will stay firm this time for real though. My god this sucks.

It does suck but NC is still your best bet.  

Posted

Sorry to hear this. All you can do is finally delete and block her. And next time don't smother someone this much, it causes the type of pushback you saw.

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