LucyMac Posted April 21, 2021 Posted April 21, 2021 Hi all, I [23F] went on a date about a week and half ago with this guy [24M] that I'd be talking to for a while on Instagram, and the date went really well. We went to coffee and talked for about 3/4 hours with no awkwardness at all, and we had a lot in common. I wasn't sure if it was just friend vibes or not so I'm interested in going on a second date to see. Since then we've messaged a fair bit, usually he initiates the conversations, but I have too, and the chat is pretty basic and not too interesting- we definitely had more to talk about in person. It's not very flirty at all, but I would put that down to us two trying to figure it out and I would say he is somewhat shy. I asked him out the first time, and he has not asked me out again - yet he does message me so seems interested. Is he really interested? and what should I do? I obviously would prefer if he asked me out this time so I know that he is interested too, and because I feel like I've taken my 'turn', but I'm not sure if he will. I also think he might think I'm not interested romantically, which is somewhat true as I'm not sure yet and I'm hoping a second meeting will help with that. Advice is much appreciated!
Ami1uwant Posted April 21, 2021 Posted April 21, 2021 I’m thinking he doesn’t know how to ask you out ifyou asked him out.
Sun Seeker Posted April 21, 2021 Posted April 21, 2021 If you had to ask him out the first time, don't expect that to change for the second time. Also if he's shy, not taking the lead, sounds like he does not have much knowledge and experience with women. Add to the fact that you have admitted you are not too romantically interested after the first date already, it's starting to sound like a second date would just be a bad idea all round anyway.
Wiseman2 Posted April 21, 2021 Posted April 21, 2021 Pull back on all the messaging and chasing. See if he steps up.
Alfano Posted April 21, 2021 Posted April 21, 2021 15 hours ago, LucyMac said: I feel like I've taken my 'turn', So ask him out again and then he owes you two turns.
smackie9 Posted April 21, 2021 Posted April 21, 2021 IMO this is dead in the water. If a guy can't step up, then you will be the one doing all the work. Not flirty? basic conversation? boring.
diana9 Posted April 22, 2021 Posted April 22, 2021 A guy should ask you out if he wants to see you. He may be shy but u took the first step to ask him if he is interested he will reciprocate. I would back off, reply to a message that is okay but I wouldn't ask him out again, in this situation you can only win, he will ask you out or he won't and you will save yourself from a guy who is not for you.
Fletch Lives Posted April 23, 2021 Posted April 23, 2021 Some guys don't know what to do. Or perhaps he's just not into you
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