Am I overthinking and being impatient or do I have a reason to be worried?

[Lisa the rock n roller]

I invited a guy  off bumble on a date last weekend after talking online for over a week. The first date went well. We had drinks and talked for four hours. I gave him a hug and said I hope we can do it again soon. When I got home, he sent a text saying that he had fun and we should see each other again. We've been in daily communication since.

 

 

We had our second date last night, we went on a nature walk and had dinner. We were both a little awkward, there were several silent moments.  He was hungover from a night out with friends. I thought the second date went ok. I told him it was fun seeing him again. I hugged him and held it while looking up at him (he's much taller than me) he got the hint and bent over a little bit so I could kiss him. He responded "cool" and smiled, I walked off chuckling.

 

 

I get home... A few hours go by and he hasn't texted, so I sent a text thanking him for a nice evening and said I hope he feels better soon. He responded a few minutes later, "Sorry I felt so terrible, it just kept getting worse, and the drive home was miserable" I told him, I've been there and understand. He didn't say anything about setting a third date, and we haven't communicated since then. I did not get much sleep last night because my thoughts kept me up. How long should I wait before considering him uninterested?

 

 

[cleverusername]

Man here, If I was interested in a woman and going on a second date, I wouldn't show up hungover. 

 

[d0nnivain]

33 minutes ago, Lisa the rock n roller said:

I did not get much sleep last night because my thoughts kept me up. How long should I wait before considering him uninterested?

I am so sorry you are so overly invested that you lost sleep over a guy you were only on 2 dates with.  I'd assume right now that he's not gonna call because he knows he screwed up. Generally though I'd give somebody 24 - 48 hours.  

[Gaeta]

You had 2 dates, it's ok to not talk every day at that point.

So far you've done all the chasing so relax and let him reach you. You have to let him show his interest.

Get busy with something, clean your closet or start watching a new netflix series.

[trident_2020]

This doesn't have anything to do with him and the texting and the hangover and anything else.

This is about you.

You sound really insecure to be so worried about a guy you met twice.

[dramafreezone]

2 hours ago, cleverusername said:

Man here, If I was interested in a woman and going on a second date, I wouldn't show up hungover. 

 

Meh, we don't even know how old they are.  When I was the age to drink that much, I wouldn't have even gone on a date if I were hungover so maybe he really liked her to gut it out like that.

[ShyViolet]

It's a bit over the top to lose sleep over a guy who you have been on two dates with.  I think you've made it clear to him that you're interested, so just leave it alone and see if he texts you again.  There's no exact time limit, but if you don't hear from him in a few days I think you can assume he's not interested.  Try not to obsess over this.  It is what it is.

[glows]

Since the second date was only last night, leave it for now and see whether he gets back to you during the week. There's no hurry.

Go about your day as normal tomorrow and don't worry about this. I think daily texting this early is a bit unnatural and odd but I may be old-fashioned.

[spiderowl]

I would not wait long, LIsa.  He has had chance to get to know you and to kiss you if he wants to.  If he is not taking the initiative after that, it is probably because:

- He assumes you will, as it seems you have been taking the initiative all along;

- He is not interested.

He doesn't sound terribly enthusiastic, does he?  Admittedly, he was unwell when he met you, which may be what was wrong.  He did turn up.  Generally, though, he does not sound very positive.  Could be just his personality.

If he does not contact you in the next 3-4 days, I would give him up as a bad job.  The alternative is that you do all the chasing, which will probably put him off anyway.  Most guys like to feel they have to 'win' the woman over.

[ExpatInItaly]

5 hours ago, ShyViolet said:

It's a bit over the top to lose sleep over a guy who you have been on two dates with. 

This. Regardless of what happens with him, I think you should re-evaluate how quickly you get attached, OP.

I would give it a few days and see if you hear anything more. If not, then chalk it up to a mismatch and keep moving. 

[smackie9]

People have heard me say this a lot....first impressions count! Showing up hungover for a date is a no no. It's rude, and disappointing. That shows he isn't about putting his best foot forward. I get it you really like this guy and willing to give him the benefit of a doubt. Sure give him a chance to make up for it. Honestly I think you are making a mistake. But whatever....give it a few days. If he doesn't contact you, next him.