cleverusername Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 (edited) Nope, but only by choice (I'm a dude btw). I have like 50 pending matches on OK, and 20 on Bumble and Tinder each but the I hate the shotgun approach. I only talk to one person at a time, and ironically the one i'm talking too now I didn't even meet online during the pandemic. Edited April 2, 2021 by cleverusername
Fletch Lives Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 10 hours ago, onegoalstl said: Well, if that's you in the avatar I don't think you would have any need for OLD. You'd get bombarded with messages that's for sure! - What, no love for me?! 1
Miss Peach Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 15 hours ago, onegoalstl said: Well, if that's you in the avatar I don't think you would have any need for OLD. You'd get bombarded with messages that's for sure! Thanks! That's really sweet! That's actually from the board game Clue. That's why I'm hanging out with Professor Plum in the library. Miss Peach was only in the expanded versions of the game. lol When I was on OLD a few years ago I actually received an email saying they would match me with better looking people because I had over 1K matches. Even with that much choice I didn't find it easy to have good dates. There's too much to weed through and the information I like to have isn't readily available in a profile. I prefer to go to meetups to meet people because then I can test whether I can enjoy their company at least prior to the date.
Miss Peach Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 14 hours ago, cleverusername said: Nope, but only by choice (I'm a dude btw). I have like 50 pending matches on OK, and 20 on Bumble and Tinder each but the I hate the shotgun approach. I only talk to one person at a time, and ironically the one i'm talking too now I didn't even meet online during the pandemic. I agree with you on the shot gun approach. Some men do it better than others but I can often tell when men are doing it. I may still go out with him but I will often take it slower with him as a result. I don't want to put too many emotions or sex on the line if a guy is still checking me out and weight his options. This doesn't seem effective either - talking to someone who won't go out. How much time do you have for dating? It seems like you could talk to one or two more people who seem like they might actually go out if that's your goal. You can still date one at a time if that's what you're comfortable with but to talk to one woman who won't go out seems ineffective to me. Plus you may just be building up a fantasy of her. 1
cleverusername Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 3 minutes ago, Miss Peach said: I agree with you on the shot gun approach. Some men do it better than others but I can often tell when men are doing it. I may still go out with him but I will often take it slower with him as a result. I don't want to put too many emotions or sex on the line if a guy is still checking me out and weight his options. This doesn't seem effective either - talking to someone who won't go out. How much time do you have for dating? It seems like you could talk to one or two more people who seem like they might actually go out if that's your goal. You can still date one at a time if that's what you're comfortable with but to talk to one woman who won't go out seems ineffective to me. Plus you may just be building up a fantasy of her. No, I hate the back in forth chit chat of it. If we match, it means there was some sort of initial attraction between the two of us, and my goal is to meet as quick as possible. If they say no, great, I'm not going to try and make them attracted. Plenty of people in the world. The "talking" stage with me is only one or two conversations. If we do click, great. I'm just going to enjoy the experience. I think there are really two approaches perpetuated in dating culture of society today, the first is the never ending reach for something "better". People will just swap and trade in people indefinitely to climb their way to what they perceive is the top, looking for someone better looking, or richer, or whatever. Then you have those who settle. They ignore all the red flags or negatives because of fear of being alone or self-image. They fall hard for someone because it is a security blanket, not because they actually enjoy their company. I like to take the middle ground. Live in the present, and explore this person. I'm not thinking long or short term, I just want someone to enjoy the now with and however long it lasts, it lasts. Way less pressure. Plus, I'm very comfortable being alone and with myself so I don't NEED someone. I can take my time with the dating process. Wow, this ended up wayyyyyy longer than I anticipated sorry hahaha
SumGuy Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 1 hour ago, Miss Peach said: ... When I was on OLD a few years ago I actually received an email saying they would match me with better looking people because I had over 1K matches. E.... What does that even mean, "better looking"? I can guarantee you if they thought "better looking" was main stream media portrayal of the "ideal" women I'd be really upset. I may date myself here, but have met women who think Tom Sellick was the hottest thing going, others that say no-way,; same for Tom Cruise; and Tom Jones, etc. etc. that's just the Tom's, let alone the Dick's and Harry's.
Miss Peach Posted April 2, 2021 Posted April 2, 2021 53 minutes ago, SumGuy said: What does that even mean, "better looking"? I can guarantee you if they thought "better looking" was main stream media portrayal of the "ideal" women I'd be really upset. I may date myself here, but have met women who think Tom Sellick was the hottest thing going, others that say no-way,; same for Tom Cruise; and Tom Jones, etc. etc. that's just the Tom's, let alone the Dick's and Harry's. My guess it had to do with how many people swiped on me. Since I had a lot of interest they tried to match me with others who were swiped a lot. I am told frequently by men I'm hot but I'm not the ideal model media look. I am of mixed ethnicity so no one can put their finger on me. I can pass for pretty much anything with darker/olive skin - Latin, Pacific Islander, Spanish, Italian, Greek, Middle Eastern, etc. My body is hourglass with a large chest. Not the type of image that would be on a typical magazine. I don't really find too many of the media's version of hot attractive either. I never understood why people thought Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt or George Clooney were hot. This is part of why I find OLD difficult for me. I have a wide range of looks I'm attracted to. And personality can make the looks more or less appealing.
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