Newly dumped by ex gf. reason being: I have issues to sort out.

[nicchamilton]

I’m 29(m). She’s 25. Me and my ex gf had been dating for about a year and 3 months. The relationship was a typical healthy relationship at first. we had some great times. Due to outside stressors like family issues/school getting tough and work being stressful I went from being overall happy to moody and hot and cold with her. This put a strain on our relationship about 8 months in. For no reason I would take things personal she would say to me even when she meant no harm. During fights I was toxic. I rarely raised my voice but our fighting definitely took an emotional toll on her. I caused fights for no reason. Not on purpose but just because I had issues in my head i needed to deal with. She told me I should see a therapist for managing stress and things related to that. I didn’t. She talked to me about this seriously a couple times. A few months later She warned me she was breaking down and running out of energy to continue this. I acknowledged she was right and I’ll try to work on it. I didn’t do anything. not because i didnt care about her but just because at the time i didnt see it as a big of a deal. I didn’t see a therapist or try and help myself. 2 months later from that Convo she dumped me giving the exact reason as talked about before. She said she was so depressed and couldn’t handle it anymore and that i broke her heart. she cried telling me this. i could tell i really damaged her. It was a clean break up and I wrote her an apology letter admitting my mistakes. We ended on very good terms. She knows I am seeking help now and working on myself. She has already expressed she isn’t romantically attracted to me anymore. She acknowledged our relationship was good at times and she doesn’t have bad feelings toward me. I truly feel like if I had done something to help myself in the relationship we would’ve never broke up. Our fights were never about serious stuff. We like the same things and have the Same morals. I’m wondering if there is anything I can do to gain her trust back or show her it wouldn’t be a repeat if we got back together. Thanks for the advice!

[Keridan]

Honestly, stop worrying about her and worry about you. I mean, I get how impossible that sounds. But you openly (and admirably) admit to what you did wrong. Until you fix that, you can't make anyone happy. Deal with your issues, then if it still works, show her you did better.

Do right by you so you can do right by those you love.

[nicchamilton]

Youre right. Thats what im currently doing. 

[TeddyBundy1993]

I think she's done with you.  When she clearly expressed being with was stressful for you & moreover she says she isn't attracted to you anymore. Still if you wanna try you will have to show yourself as a complete different man for whom she fell for. But it isn't easy always and it's exhausting. Look she already mentioned your behavior drained her. Keep yourself in her shoes would you return to such person or run away? Still you wanna pursue her then it's your call but do not rush into anything or try hard. Give her, her space catch up for normal and test where is her level of interest in you.  If she's done just let her go. And move on yourself. If she gives you another chance needless to say don't behave like previous times

[trident_2020]

If you really cared about her you'd be thinking about what she wants, not what you want.