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We never had a 1st meet due to the weird time she suggested for today


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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, d0nnivain said:

Neither of you was into the other enough to bend to make the meeting happen. 

You would rather stay up until 4 a.m. playing video games then go to sleep earlier so you could wake up & meet this new person at 11 a.m. 

She prioritized friends over meeting you.  

She prioritized her friends only after he made it clear HE prioritized playing video games till 4:00 a.m. rather than go to bed early enough to take her out the following morning. 

She's probably had it up to here with rigid controlling men expecting women to twist themselves into pretzels accommodating their schedule and in this case a rather wacky one consisting of playing video games till all hours of the morning.😳

I don't blame her, that would be a next for me too, sorry mate.

Edited by poppyfields
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Posted
4 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

She prioritized her friends only after he made it clear HE prioritized playing video games all night rather than go to bed early enough to take her out the following morning. 

She's probably had it up to here with rigid controlling men expecting women to twist themselves into pretzels accommodating their schedule and in this case a rather wacky one consisting of playing video games all night.😳

I don't blame her, that would be a next for me too.

Yeah, this. You're asking her to accommodate you, but were unwilling to accommodate her. You couldn't go to sleep earlier a few hours or wake up two hours earlier to meet her? I would next too...

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Posted
15 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

earlier in the week I sent her a text saying......"Weather looks real good for saturday"     Then she responded and I dont know how we starting discuss the details over text.    Then when she said lets meet at 11am my response was "I dont go to sleep until 4am and dont wake up until 12pm so lets make it for 2pm?    Then had a issue with that and then I even tried to bend a little and was willing to set my alarm for 945am.   Then I text her yesterday and said hope your day is going well and I will call you later to discuss tomorrow.    She said........"I made plans to do something with my friend so it will have to be later"    I called last night at 11pm to confirm what time and she never answered the phone and never text me today so her number has been deleted and she has been blocked

 

Reminder for the future to myself........."never discuss anything regarding meeting over text just wait until we talk on the phone"            I think the 11am discussion would have been better over the phone

Your sense of perspective is way off here.   For most people 11am is no where near to early.  A better way to play it is to agree, let her know you can make that work and warn her you may be a little sleepy need to get coffee because of your normal hours.  UNLESS that 4am bedtime is not due to work and just your lifestyle, as that kind of lifestyle is way off from most people.  Assuming she even believes you and doesn't think you are blowing her off for some reason...also if the goal is to be out in the nice weather...2pm is a kind of a late start where I live.

The lesson isn't never discuss over text but use the phone, the lesson is learn to be more flexible and sacrifice a little sleep...most people can make it through on night of only getting 5-6 hours of sleep.  In short, be more "can do" instead of "I don't know."  She seems pretty can do as after you said you couldn't do before 2pm she made plans..yet was still open it seems to meeting later in the day...which should have been fine for you as it accommodates your schedule. 

Also why wait to 11pm to call?  Are you trying to have it not happen?   Again perspective, it is not uncommon for a lot of people for 11pm to be in bed or at least ending their day, and not a time to initiate a phone call.  Blocking and deleting seems like an overreaction then, when someone says later I'm thinking 5pm or 6pm...if they haven't called by 9pm I'd figure they were blowing me off even though I don't go to sleep until midnight normally.

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Posted
11 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

I dont think I have never met anyone that early on 1st meet.   That was such a odd time to be meeting

We each live our own experiences, but can say 11am is not early to most in my experience.   That is it is not odd at all, waking up at noon, barring working the night shift or being a teenager is the more "odd" schedule for an adult.

And a very "I am interested in you" time because brunch is a very much interested in you time.  In fact, for those who I have known/know who are active outdoor folks, 11am is half the day is over. 

I suggest you need to gain more perspective on how others live and realize that if the reason you can't meet for a 11am brunch is your normal habit is to watch videos and play video games until 4am...and you really would rather have her work around that instead of you valuing meeting her more than than those extra 2 or 3 hours of video...most women are going to next you.   

Just for the record, I love computer games as well and having nothing against video games nor do I look down on them as a form of entertainment...it's just perspective man.

 

Posted

Sorry, but a 4am bedtime screams "party boy" or "gamer." And neither of those are worth my time.  11am is a perfectly reasonable time to have a 1st meet brunch date. 

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Posted
5 minutes ago, Crazelnut said:

Sorry, but a 4am bedtime screams "party boy" or "gamer." And neither of those are worth my time.  11am is a perfectly reasonable time to have a 1st meet brunch date. 

Just like last night, I went to bed at 5am and woke up at 12pm today.     Thats my schedule for years

Posted
1 minute ago, IntBrowser said:

Just like last night, I went to bed at 5am and woke up at 12pm today.     Thats my schedule for years

Good luck dating, then.  Surely you realize that's not typical, right?

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Posted (edited)

When you have a girlfriend she will have to endure this and go to bed by herself ?

You got to pick,  you want a relationship or the life of a bachelor.

How old are you?

Edited by Gaeta
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Posted
16 hours ago, IntBrowser said:

  I called last night at 11pm to confirm

You called to confirm at a time when most people are asleep less than 12 hrs before you wanted to meet, when she already had plans

Quote

We never had a 1st meet due to the weird time she suggested for today

The time she suggested is perfectly normal. Most of society doesn't go to sleep at 5 and wake at 12. Either you need to change your sleep schedule or date someone who works nights. 

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Posted

If I remember correctly you are around 40, so what woman of ~40 wants a man who is up all night playing video games and listening to music and who can't be bothered to get up early enough to meet her at 11am...
You sound like a confirmed bachelor actually

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Posted

Lol, I had assumed you worked at night before, didn't know you just stay up late. 

I agree with everyone. She probably got turned off that you just regularly sleep until noon and couldn't alter your schedule. Very few women are going to be OK with that. You might want to change your habits and don't bring up your sleep schedule anymore. 

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Posted
3 minutes ago, elaine567 said:

If I remember correctly you are around 40

🤨

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Posted
3 hours ago, poppyfields said:

So in her mind, you'd rather watch videos and listen to music until 4:00 am, then go to bed at a reasonable hour to take her out the next day. 🙄

>>Then when she said lets meet at 11am my response was "I dont go to sleep until 4am and dont wake up until 12pm so lets make it for 2pm? 

This^^ sounds rigid, inflexible, and if me reflects a lack of interest.  Not sure what you were thinking assuming she or any woman would be okay with this non-chalant, lackadaisical attitude.  

When "courting" a woman, an interested man would have gone to bed early enough to take a woman out the next day at a time convenient to her.

Not expect her to accommodate your wacky schedule cause you'd rather play video games to all hours of the morning.  Lord.

If it was because of your job, that's different, if me I would have accommodated.

But to play video games? 🤣

What were you thinking telling her that?  She's not a frat buddy for goodness sakes, I am assuming this is a woman you are interested in romantically? 

I dont play video games,  I was watching a game and betting on sports which is something I do on friday night.   Why change all that for a stranger I just met.   Now of course if we hit it off I would start to eliminate some things

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Posted
1 hour ago, Crazelnut said:

Sorry, but a 4am bedtime screams "party boy" or "gamer." And neither of those are worth my time.  11am is a perfectly reasonable time to have a 1st meet brunch date. 

so having things you enjoy doing that has you up until 4am is now an issue? lol    I thought we all had things we enjoyed doing when we are not working

Posted (edited)
26 minutes ago, IntBrowser said:

I dont play video games,  I was watching a game and betting on sports which is something I do on friday night.   Why change all that for a stranger I just met.   Now of course if we hit it off I would start to eliminate some things

Fair point I suppose but it's important to be cognizant of how your actions appear to the women you date or want to date. 

Here, your action of preferring to stay awake until 4:00 am and then expecting her to accommodate that, in her mind translates to rigid, unyielding, controlling, not interested.

I mean you didn't even allow her the opportunity to say yes or no man.

You said "I dont wake before 12:00 pm, let's make it 2:00 pm." 

Assuming 2:00 pm worked for her, because it worked for you.

Of course, you have the right to do whatever the hell you want, just don't be surprised if women aren't interested.

You are not the commander-in-chief lol, you don't get to make all the rules and expect women to follow like we're low life peons placed on this earth to accommodate men. 😂

Edited by poppyfields
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Posted

And then you block her like she did something wrong. 
 

You can do whatever you want but don’t expect someone to bend to your weird schedule when you can’t compromise. 

Posted

Need not make so complicated.  Give her a "hoot hoot" and reschedule.🦉

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Posted

Obviously yours and her expectations are different. It wasn't a match. Carry on.

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Posted
1 hour ago, IntBrowser said:

I dont play video games,  I was watching a game and betting on sports which is something I do on friday night. 

Ok so you are a gambler too, that will have gone down well...

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Posted

It’s pretty obvious she didn’t want to go on the date at any time of the day 

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Posted
3 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

It’s pretty obvious she didn’t want to go on the date at any time of the day 

True ^    Between the last minute arrangement and the hours you keep, she decided to not bother meeting you. 

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Posted
3 minutes ago, Cookiesandough said:

It’s pretty obvious she didn’t want to go on the date at any time of the day 

Possibly, but not obvious, imo.  She did suggest 11:00 a.m..which is reasonable.

To me, it was his presumptuous attitude that turned her off.

>>Then when she said lets meet at 11am my response was "I dont go to sleep until 4am and dont wake up until 12pm so lets make it for 2pm?

A bit arrogant, but who knows cookies you may be right. 

Or maybe she was on the fence and his response pushed her to the "off" side.

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Posted
1 hour ago, elaine567 said:

Ok so you are a gambler too, that will have gone down well...

Its a hobby not part of my everyday living account

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Posted
4 hours ago, norealusername said:

Lol, I had assumed you worked at night before, didn't know you just stay up late. 

I agree with everyone. She probably got turned off that you just regularly sleep until noon and couldn't alter your schedule. Very few women are going to be OK with that. You might want to change your habits and don't bring up your sleep schedule anymore. 

I always been a night owl

Posted
4 minutes ago, poppyfields said:

Or maybe she was on the fence and his response pushed her to the "off" side.

That's my thought on the situation.  

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